My mum is very depressed and in hospital/stroke?

Sorry to hear about your mom. Both of my folks are doing well, but my DH's folks both went through a lot of medical issues before passing on. I know it is hard on the family.

Just be there for her even when she is ornery. Just remember with your health to take care of yourself too.

Prayers are going out to you and your mom.
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Oh my...Im so sorry to hear of your moms health. Its hard to watch a parent get older. Sounds like you mom and mine are in the same boat. Dr said, she wont see another Christmas. Just spend as much time as you can with her.
You are such a careing and loveing person Helen...and almost to a fault! Dont let yourself get worn down. You have a lot on your plate, but remember....you are first..take good care of yourself. We all love ya here...and you can PM me any time you just need to talk.

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My mom has a lot of issues; well, has had them for a good portion of her life. My older brother & sister (I was sort of an accident at 8 years younger) are no longer in contact with her, so I'm in charge. She's 83 now, and has a long litany of health problems. I moved her out from Boston about 4 years ago to be with us here in California. One thing that has helped, that I think Purple Chicken mentioned, is just letting the negative comments breeze past without really letting them register. A read a "psych" type book when I was younger - I think it's called "The Road Less Traveled" about a strategy to use when you are trying to get through a difficult conversation, and it's helped a lot. I know it sounds odd, but you basically pretend that you are not there, and you ask the person a bunch of questions - focus entirely on them. You are not there, so their answers are irrelevant, but it makes them feel acknowledged & appreciated. Not sure if you have kids, Bantymum, but the hardest part for me has been trying to shield my kids (5 & 8) from a difficult situation. I would never leave my kids alone with my mom, let's put it that way.

Anyway, you are in my thoughts. Take comfort in the good memories you have - my siblings have none of those; since I came along a bit later & was raised by my aunt and uncle, I have quite a few. They (the good memories) are probably what has made it possible for me to maintain the relationship that I have.

Laura
 
I wish you the best Bantymum in your struggles. Sometimes we think why me? Sometimes we feel we are being tested like Job in the bible. I lost both of my parents to cancer and there is nothing worse to see what was a vibrant person disenergrate before your eyes. To see this nearly tore the life out of me. It really depresses me when certain holidays roll around ie mothers and fathers day. I wish the best for your mom and you as well as I know you to have been battling your own health problems. I know it can been wrenching to see a animal be sick. I had both my cat and dog get sick on me within a 3 week span. Anyway you have a wide support here to try and help you through this. Anyway feel free to vent-rant or whatever here. You will be in our thoughts and prayers.
 
Bantymum: May the good Lord give you all the strength you need to deal with all this. It's tough, really tough but you sound like a strong woman so I'm sure you will get through all this.
Prayers coming your way.
Jacie
 
So sorry about your mum. Mine went thru a very drastic change when she had lung cancer. She was very active and led a busy life. After the surgery, she is a shell of herself. So hard and sad to see. She's 80 yrs. old. She has come out of her depression somewhat, but she's not the fun loving mom she use to be. It' s like she waiting for death to take her. Hope you mom gets better.
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Thankyou so very much for your sweet replies.
I had a good sleep and am recharged.
I always have to remember that my dear little boy is at a critical age to learn about life and He comes first no matter what.
Mum is in good hands with lovely nurses who cuddle her lots.
The animals are doing well too.
I just have to reorganise my schedule so nothing gets neglected.
Love you all thankyou.
Its 10am here now and I have a beautiful sunny day, now to take a shower, wash my hair, get out the back and build a dove landing ramp so I can let them out for their first freedom flight.
 

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