This is my first, personal, non related post. I need to vent.
My DH and I have been married for 11 years. His kids have always been challenging. He's got a boy and a girl, and I've got two boys. My oldest son is 23, marred 3 years and has a baby daughter that is 15 mos old. My first grandchild! LOVE IT!
My youngest son is turning 18 next month, and he's a senior this year. He's going to college when he graduates, to persue a career in computers. I'm really proud of my boys. Good manners, pretty good students, they haven't been perfect but what kid is?
On to the step-kids. They didn't live with us for about the first half of our marriage. Brittany moved in with us when she was 12, but then she discovered BOYS. Lost all interest in sports (she was a great basketball player!), and life became BOYS BOYS BOYS with her. We put her on the pill, because she began lying about what she was doing, to be with boys. In the meantime, her mom married a third husband, with FIVE SONS! And magically, Brit moved back home with her mother to be near the BOYS! At her mother's house, she skipped school until she was expelled, shoplifted twice and was arrested and went to jail. She is now 20 and pregnant by one of her step brothers at her mom's house (NOT MY BOYS). Her mother did not protect her as she should have. I would have gone nuts if my boys even looked at her the wrong way, which they never did. "That would be gross, Mom!" Is their response.
Step dau has moved back home. She has done a 360 turn about with her attitude, we've got her studying to get her GED. Baby is due in Oct. She helps with housework and is, in her own words, "Glad to be home"! I'm proud of her for trying to turn things around, and of course will do what I can to make sure baby and mama get off to a good start.
Now, the step-son is a pot smoking burn out. He's been caught with pres drugs twice in the house, plus pot and other stuff. I am just so tired of it. He is a nasty, disrespectful brat who cares only to have a good time. DH is tired of this too, and so his way of dealing with it is to let the boy do what he wants. Step son is never home, and when he is home, his attitude is terrible. His hygene is bad too. All I ask is that he cleans his room, takes his dirty clothes down to the laundry room, and takes out the trash. Very small things that only take a minute, and it's like pulling teeth.
The kicker here is that his dad let him have a party in our neighboring woods behind the house. Where he had pot and alcohol. He is not 18 yet. He asked my son to go to the party too. (This was supposed to be a campout, with food and a campfire.) Against my better judgement I let him go. Now my son was acting suspicious. (We are very close). I point blank asked him if they had pot and alcohol there and he said yes.
This is the second time now, (I know, shame on me) that the step-son has gotten my son to party. ) My son just stays with us on the weekends and alot in the summer, because he lives with his dad to attend a good high school. I am feeling like a predator lives in my own house. A drug dealer is preying on my own child.
It's becoming a strain on the marriage because DH doesn't discipline his son. Step-son does whatever he wants. It's like he rules the roost. I am punishing both boys.
They will paint our shed, the hen house, and two smaller coops. They will do yard work and other things until everything is ship-shape and ready for fall outside in the yard. They will be doing heavy duty chores outside, as punishment for breaking the rules. No fun until all the things are finished. I will be right outside working along with them. I need to paint the front deck and picnic table, so I can keep an eye on them.
I really want the step son to go back to his mothers. (He came to us later, and he was already too much into smoking pot, I think.) His dad wants him to stay here and graduate, but he will turn 18 in January, and still has TWO years of school yet, because he has failed a year. He does get good grades since he's been with us, BUT he has behavioral problems every single year. He's in the IEP program, and that helps him too. It is exhausting. He doesn't want to follow our rules, (my rules, I guess, which are no underage drinking, no drugs.) We are constantly bickering and I don't trust him one bit. I don't trust him driving. But his dad doesn't care, lets him do whatever he wants to do.
I am at the point where, I think if he doesn't want to follow our rules, then he should go back to mommy's where he can smoke pot and do everything he wants anyhow. I just don't care anymore.
THERE! I VENTED! I do feel better....Thank you for reading.....
Signed,
The self proclaimed evil step-monster, AKA Mommie Dearest
My DH and I have been married for 11 years. His kids have always been challenging. He's got a boy and a girl, and I've got two boys. My oldest son is 23, marred 3 years and has a baby daughter that is 15 mos old. My first grandchild! LOVE IT!
My youngest son is turning 18 next month, and he's a senior this year. He's going to college when he graduates, to persue a career in computers. I'm really proud of my boys. Good manners, pretty good students, they haven't been perfect but what kid is?
On to the step-kids. They didn't live with us for about the first half of our marriage. Brittany moved in with us when she was 12, but then she discovered BOYS. Lost all interest in sports (she was a great basketball player!), and life became BOYS BOYS BOYS with her. We put her on the pill, because she began lying about what she was doing, to be with boys. In the meantime, her mom married a third husband, with FIVE SONS! And magically, Brit moved back home with her mother to be near the BOYS! At her mother's house, she skipped school until she was expelled, shoplifted twice and was arrested and went to jail. She is now 20 and pregnant by one of her step brothers at her mom's house (NOT MY BOYS). Her mother did not protect her as she should have. I would have gone nuts if my boys even looked at her the wrong way, which they never did. "That would be gross, Mom!" Is their response.
Step dau has moved back home. She has done a 360 turn about with her attitude, we've got her studying to get her GED. Baby is due in Oct. She helps with housework and is, in her own words, "Glad to be home"! I'm proud of her for trying to turn things around, and of course will do what I can to make sure baby and mama get off to a good start.
Now, the step-son is a pot smoking burn out. He's been caught with pres drugs twice in the house, plus pot and other stuff. I am just so tired of it. He is a nasty, disrespectful brat who cares only to have a good time. DH is tired of this too, and so his way of dealing with it is to let the boy do what he wants. Step son is never home, and when he is home, his attitude is terrible. His hygene is bad too. All I ask is that he cleans his room, takes his dirty clothes down to the laundry room, and takes out the trash. Very small things that only take a minute, and it's like pulling teeth.
The kicker here is that his dad let him have a party in our neighboring woods behind the house. Where he had pot and alcohol. He is not 18 yet. He asked my son to go to the party too. (This was supposed to be a campout, with food and a campfire.) Against my better judgement I let him go. Now my son was acting suspicious. (We are very close). I point blank asked him if they had pot and alcohol there and he said yes.
This is the second time now, (I know, shame on me) that the step-son has gotten my son to party. ) My son just stays with us on the weekends and alot in the summer, because he lives with his dad to attend a good high school. I am feeling like a predator lives in my own house. A drug dealer is preying on my own child.
It's becoming a strain on the marriage because DH doesn't discipline his son. Step-son does whatever he wants. It's like he rules the roost. I am punishing both boys.
They will paint our shed, the hen house, and two smaller coops. They will do yard work and other things until everything is ship-shape and ready for fall outside in the yard. They will be doing heavy duty chores outside, as punishment for breaking the rules. No fun until all the things are finished. I will be right outside working along with them. I need to paint the front deck and picnic table, so I can keep an eye on them.
I really want the step son to go back to his mothers. (He came to us later, and he was already too much into smoking pot, I think.) His dad wants him to stay here and graduate, but he will turn 18 in January, and still has TWO years of school yet, because he has failed a year. He does get good grades since he's been with us, BUT he has behavioral problems every single year. He's in the IEP program, and that helps him too. It is exhausting. He doesn't want to follow our rules, (my rules, I guess, which are no underage drinking, no drugs.) We are constantly bickering and I don't trust him one bit. I don't trust him driving. But his dad doesn't care, lets him do whatever he wants to do.
I am at the point where, I think if he doesn't want to follow our rules, then he should go back to mommy's where he can smoke pot and do everything he wants anyhow. I just don't care anymore.
THERE! I VENTED! I do feel better....Thank you for reading.....
Signed,
The self proclaimed evil step-monster, AKA Mommie Dearest
