need help/suggestions re: autistic son - dangerous

[farmerlor]

Several of my children have FAS and while that's it's not autism some characteristics of FAS are hyperactivity, NO impulse control and a very low pain threshold. Those last two symptoms make these children very dangerous to themselves because they honestly think (actually they don't spend a lot of time in thought about it) that it might be fun to jump over the bannister and roll down two flights of stairs. When my daughter started getting up at night and wandering around we had the same fears that you have so we eventually started locking her in. With our bedroom right next to hers we could hear if she needed us in the night and she was safe.

 

[klf73]

I appreciate the ideas but with 7 kids in the family no one has their own room. He rooms in the huge master bedroom with his 2 older brothers which is why he is on a different floor. Our bedroom was converted from our old family room and the family room moved to the basement. I found a bed, think it is Noah's World Bed, which would be awesome if I could get his insurance to cover it. It is exactly what I need but the $3600+ isn't doable right now. I am going to call his pediatrician and his specialist on Monday as well as speak to the teachers/therapists at his school. Will try and cross my fingers it works. I think this plus a baby monitor for him to let me know he needs to get out is the best solution. Motion alarms won't work as we have many pets...

 

[saddina]

After looking at the bed site, it's a modified bunk bed. It seems that you could do up one with a bunk bed, tent fabric and mesh.

 

[klf73]

the zippers are the biggest thing. and with a bunk it wouldn't go high enough that he couldn't undo the zipper from the inside. If dh was here I would have him build something, but since he's not.........

 

[keystonepaul]

you have to think out of the box. and out of yourcommfort zone a bit. First, how can he get a knife to do harm. They should be key locked away- yes they can, it's a pain in arse, but they can- everyone every time they are used- take em out, use em, wash/dry them, return them to locked. Same with matches, lighters, etc. Second, do what you have to do to get him in his own room and secure it if that's what it takes. Two bunk beds in one room=4 kids in one room. I slept in a room with two brothers- 1 single bed, 1 bunk and enough room for two dressers and us to walk between beds. let the kids whine about being cramped- it's your house, your family, third, you can buy a motion sensor alarm that will sound when he gets up, it can be mounted high on the cieling put it across his door, the speaker part is mobile and can be kept by your bedside. He opens the door and comes out into the hall, you get woken up and get him back to bed, Fourth, what type of services is he getting?? What about the county behaviorist and a plan for your family and him. Some are really good, some are poor and it depends on the agency and moreso on the individual clinician, but help is available- find it, be a bother till you get it, if you don't like the clinician ask for another, time after time, after time until you get one that make sense, fifth, you might not like the things offered in by the clinician, or think you can't do them, but you can and should. Parents often have a difficult time ignoring attention seeking behavior and responding to postive, not making eye contact or using verbal communication and relying on gestural prompting, etc when teaching skills, shaping behavior, or whatever else seems to work, don't be the weak link in the chain (this may deal more with day to day stuff than the actual up at night issue, but it's all part of the big picture), Sixth, respit help is available (again big picture, long term) everyone needs a break there are respit group homes available- overnight, weekends, etc, and often paid for through medicaide/medicare, ect. utilize them, You need a break from time to time. Again, there are wonderful companies running group homes out there and absolute horrors- do you homework. Good luck Keystonepaul

 

[sune42]

The problem I see with the alarm is waking everyone else up. It may sound cruel, but I was going to suggest switching the doorknob around so you can lock it from the outside of the room. However with two other people that may be a problem. Sorry I don't have anything else useful to suggest. Best of luck to you.

 

[Sonoran Silkies]

I agree with KeystonePaul--you need to get him into a room of his own where you can better control him. Is there any way you can build an interior wall to separate one of the bedrooms into two smaller ones? Or do you have a large closet that could be made into sleeping quarters for him? I do worry about the idea of locking him in--what about fire or other emergency? I would check with his doctor about the possibility of sedation. While he might need less sleep than typical children his age, is there any chance that he is getting rest at times when he should not? Or that he is not getting enough exercise and activity during the day?

ANy anything that could even remotely be dangerous neeeds to be under lock and key--preferably combination locks, so that you don't have to worry about him finding and taking the key.

 

[mom'sfolly]

Another option would be to move him into your room, at least temporarily. Or move a bed into the living room so that he is on the same floor as you. In this case, a sleeper sofa might be your best friend. And put alarms on every door that goes to the outside. Put them up high enough that he can't reach them, don't bother to tell him they are there, and set them before you go to sleep.

 

[geebs]

Gaba.... email me... I have a 16 year old son and we got the shirt already.. I have some great resources for you.

http://www.understandingautism.org/

 

[geebs]

My son burned our house down... Really... I didn't get him diagnosed til he was 13... I will tell you now what I did.. You need to manage his diet very carefully... Odds are he has triggers that are setting him off and not letting his brain shut down.... I would look at a NO SUGAR and a Low starch diet.... It is a very difficult thing... No milk for my son as it acts like an opiate in his system... I would spend money on understanding autism as opposed to a bed... I would put some kind of device on him that wakes you when he is up and give him somethign to do at night (game machine).... To teach an autististic child requires calm repetition... Their brain works soooo differentlly. I am available to talk to on the phone.

Medications for autism can make it worse.... But Gaba should help calm him.. You have a gifted son like I do... (if something is dangerous.... It cannot be on the property)... that is just how it is here... They are soooo resourceful... their brains work like that... I can't HIDE anything from my son... he will find it... no matter if I dug a hole under the house... he would find it... but it is a gift.... If I lose something... he can find it...no matter what...

Tony Atwood is the foremost leading expert on Aspbergers (high functioning autism)... I highly recommend his video/clinics etc.....It is easy to understand and does cover all areas on the autism spectrum from Aspergers to the very impacted. You can find his material if you google it... Or if anyone wants more info... email me.