Need help...***Update***I think I'm done guys!

[JessHall]

Thank you all so much for all your input and kind words.
I guess the hardest thing for me, is living in a small house, a dish on the table can make the whole kitchen look a mess... (by the way, I'm the dishwasher, we don't have a real one... many people don't so I'm gonna quit complaining!) etc.
I always worry about what it would look like the next day if I don't at least spot clean. Or I worry about how long it will take to do it all, or I hate spending my entire day off, doing house work. My parents only live two houses up, and I shutter at the thought of them seeing the house a mess...
I guess I'm all screwed up because I just caught myself thinking, ok, if I have the sitter drop him off, I'll have 10 minutes to clean up the house then I'll spend time w/ him... Or, if I ask to leave work 30 min. early, I can race home and do it...but then I'm loosing $! I am really way too messed up right now. And on top of it all my body is telling me it's time to quit all together. ALL my muscles are hard as rocks. OK, I'm just whining at this point.
Thanks, guys. I'm going home and letting everything slide for a little bit. I think a nice walk would do our whole family some good.

 

[Wifezilla]

He hardly sees you and you worry about dishes? Buy paper plates and give yourself and him a break.

 

[agnes_day]

i had one like that..he was such a terror! he would even strip his clothes off and take off down the road, laughing at my poor attempts to catch up to him. he finally grew out of it, thank god.

it will pass, i promise.

 

[TipsyDog]

I'm old school and believe a woman should stay home and raise her children. I'm probably going to take alot of heat for that comment, but it's just what I believe.

Is there ANY way you can quit your job (or one of them)? I understand all the financial reasons - really I do - but I've found most women I know who work have to because of their own choices in life. New car, new house, clothes, shopping, eating out, baby sitter ... the list keeps going. If you stay home, cook all food from scratch, don't need work clothes, commuting, baby sitter, take-out, lunches, etc., etc., can you still pay the bills?

There are so many things in this consumer society that you really don't need. I know if I got a job it would cost me money. Between a car to commute, clothing and all the things I mentioned and THEN the additional taxes because of a higher tax bracket, it wouldn't be worth giving up home cooked meals for my family and my position of wife and mother always here for everyone who need me, including all the animal care, lawn mowing, gardening, canning, etc. For example, today I hand washed and waxed my DH's truck because I had time and he will be thrilled. Now he has less to do on the weekend so we have more time to enjoy each other's company.

I really feel for women today who have to work and raise a youngster. It's very hard. I wish you all the best with your little boy!

 

[ScoobyRoo]

You have some long posts here so forgive me if someone wrote this already. Forget cleaning the house. You only get this one chance. Spend it with him. Make a deal, "help me put these clothes away and we will play a game." I was clean freak until you learn (experience) that life can be short. Enjoy it with your loved ones while you can.

 

[deb1]

Quote:
This is a good idea. Paper plates and cups could be really helpful at this stage of your child's life.

 

[JessHall]

My day has gotten worse.... Long term, not so sure what the outcome will be, but at the moment it feels bad.
My son wants NOTHING to do with me this evening.
I made the easiest dinner possible and I am hoping onion will pass for a veggie tonight...
My husband had to work late...
and I'M NOT GOING TO HAVE MY BABYSITTER AFTER A MONTH!!!!!! Yeah, that got sprung on me when I picked him up today. My God sister watches him, and her little half bro at her dad and step moms house. They are fire fighters, and just had another baby, very good people... and they're moving... in a month! I knew it was coming but didn't believe it, now it's true and I'm really sad.
Choosing a person to leave my child with is the scariest decision I've had to make as a mom.
Thanks for all your support.

maybe a prayer or two would do me some good.

 

[augustmomx2]

It is one of the most difficult decisions! You'll find someone, I promise...I have found the majority of my childcare through co-workers and have been very happy.

I have a 3yo dd (just turned 3 in Aug) and your son sounds like she is. Everything she does is so exhausting, but she's the best helper ever

I tell my dh all the time that God gave her to us to keep us young, but age us at the same time

Long ago, after my ds was born, I made "rules" for myself. I would start with a rule to apply during that week. For example; no cooking on Fridays...EVER. Leftovers, wing-it, it doesn't matter, so long as I don't have to cook and we can all eat on disposable utensils/plates.

Another rule, baths at discretion when they were young. My ds who is now 7 requires a shower everyday, but he's old enough to take his own. My 3yo dd, gets a bath everyother day.

Find something that is a time-sucker and learn to adjust it. Make it easier for you. That way you'll still accomplish the task, but it will be done more efficiently/easier.

You are doing the best as you can as a mom

Your son is fine with your best and you should be too

 

[Carolina]

I agree with TipsyDog. See if in the next month you can figure out how to stay home and be a mom or work-at-home mom. I've done what she suggests about figuring out how much your job costs--you'd be surprised how the money really isn't worth it.

You'll find out that the time with a happy son and husband are worth $$$$$$$$$$$$!!

 

[Wifezilla]

Wait wait wait...

You work two jobs, and you are married and your husband is working???

(Tipsydog, hold me back)