Not sure how much more I can take!!!

jjdward

How bout them DAWGS!
10 Years
May 4, 2009
1,321
3
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Buchanan, Georgia
As I sit here and think about a new year starting and the last one ending, all I can think about is how CRAPPY 2009 was!!!!. Now before I go on, let me say that I feel bad for even thinking that cause I know that every breath I draw is a blessing form God. I know He loves me and will never leave me.

Here is the deal:
In all my 26 years on this earth, I have never had a year that has been more troubled or filled with more trials. The last 6 months have really been bad. Everything I have done has fallen apart! I don't mean big things. I mean little every day things, but its EVERYDAY!!!
To just name a few:
Cut backs at work both in number of hours as well as hourly pay
Had to deal with a CRAZY girlfriend(she is an ex now thank God) that was almost the death of me!!!
While doing some tune up work on my truck, I broke off a spark plug and now I need to have the head re-worked (not cheap)
Lots of plumbing problems (I hate plumbing)
The truck I bought was doing just fine till about 2 months ago and then it has been one thing after another

Then toward the end of October, I started dating somebody(We'll call her Jane). Things with Jane and I have been going great till about three weeks ago. Nothing too big in the long run but it was hell for me at its peak!!!! If it hadn't been for a mutual friend of ours, I would have not stood by Jane the way she was treating me. Things are much better now but not like they were. I really hope they are headed back that way!!!
And one other thing: This may be hard for some to understand, but the Lord has really been making my heart heavy with something. I don't know what to call it but I know its something!!! Its not conviction, not sadness, not fear. But I'm just so emotional about God and His love for me!!!! Now I have been a Christian for a long time, but I have never felt like this!!!! I mean I can't even sing regular peppy songs at church without tearing up!!!!

To sum this thing up I'll say this: 2009 would have to be one of if not the worst years of my life. There have been so many trials and troubles. To the point to where I don't know how much more I can take. I'm truly at my wits end. Even in the midst of these storms and trials, I truly beleive the Lord has something planned for me!!!! I don't ask that He take away the storms He has given me, but I pray ( and ask you to pray) that He helps me sail through them. So I guess the reason I posted this is because I wanted to ask if you would pray for me. I need wisdom, strength and peace. I'm not wanting pity or anything, just prayer and advise! Thanks in advance!!!!
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Ya know, 2009 was not good for a lot of us!!! I believe that God is preparing you for something to come. May be you, may be a friend. The only thing I encourage you to REMEMBER!!!! We are NOT to judge others, it's not our job. It's God's. Accept the people in your life for who they are, without judgement. And we are allowed to sever ties with people who act against us - adultery, stealing, lying to harm you.... You get my drift.
 
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I have seen too many people lately quick to judge someone because their faith says it's wrong. They tend to forget the judgement is God's chore, not ours. We are too love others as we love ourselves, as hard as that is sometimes, it is still what is expected.
 
2009 was a rough year. Been to more funerals than I care to count, my favorite dog died ( NOT joking) and sometimes we wouldn't be eating if it weren't for the canning I did all summer and the eggs that the hens poop out for me. AND YET, being old, I realize it's the crap that life deals us that makes us the sturdy folks we are (you know the verse..."knowing that the testing of our faith produces endurance", right?). We learn to focus on what we can do, what has gone right and enjoy the little things. Our problem solving skills are improved as is our sense of accomplishment. I know a gal whose life is simple. She is a housewife with everything. She buys what she wants, when she wants. She could work, or not and she is the most miserable person I know. Her sister is the opposite. Single Mom who has physical challenges and a son who is going to need a form of cranial surgery that would make you wince and cry. Do you know what she calls these events? Opportunities for victory. Everyday each one of us has an opportunity and sometimes multiples. It's the choices we make and the perspective we choose to take that colors the outcome. List the good things and focus on them. I think you'll find that life is better then you think. You have a job. I'd be willing to bet that you have a family that loves you. Your truck probably started today and I'd be willing to bet that you have had three squares. If you really need to put your plumbing issues into perspective and have a laugh I'll tell you the story of the time my husband caused the toilet to levitate off the floor of our house. If I die with a smile on my face it will be because of that little gem...
 
jjdward, maybe the feeling that you are having towards God is thankfulness for helping you through the previous year as bad as it was. It is good to be humble and know that He is God.

If you make yourself available He will use you...Isaiah 6:8, "Also I heard the voice of the Lord, saying, Whom shall I send, and who will go for us? Then said I, Here am I; send me."

Ed
 
Please remember that life ALWAYS DOES get better. I think of life as a circle/cycle.. its gets bad/hard at times...but then it ALWAYS turns around and good things happen. Then it gets crummy again... then it gets better again....
Its just how life is. Nobodys life is ALWAYS perfect and always happy. Please keep the strength to keep on, keeping on. Best wishes to you.
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