Okay, this was really funny. LOL.

[Fierlin1182]

A linguistics professor was lecturing his class the other day. "In English," he said, "a double negative forms a positive. However, in some languages, such as Russian, a double negative remains a negative. But there isn't a single language, not one, in which a double positive can express a negative."
A voice from the back of the room retorted, "Yeah, right."

 

[BirdNut]

That's great! I love stuff like that. Thanks for sharing, Ray!

 

[Fierlin1182]

It can't be healthy, doing so much chest-splitting giggling.

Basic Flying Rules:
1. Try to stay in the middle of the air.
2. Do not go near the edges of it.
3. The edges of the air can be recognized by the appearance of ground, buildings, sea, trees and interstellar space. It is much more difficult to fly there.

 

[Fierlin1182]

Tower: Mission 123, do you have problems?
Pilot: I think, I have lost my compass.
Tower: Judging the way you are flying, you lost the whole instrument panel!


A young and stupid pilot wanted to sound cool on the aviation frequencies.
So, this one time he was approaching a field during the night time.
Instead of making any official requests to the tower, he said: "Guess who?"
The controller switched the field lights off and replied: "Guess where!"


ATC: Piper N 4444D, traffic at your 2o'clock, 500 ft below you.
Piper N4444D: Well, we see a light coming towards us ...
ATC: Look again - there's probably a plane behind that light.


ATC: "N123YZ, say altitude."
N123YZ: "ALTITUDE!"
ATC: "N123YZ, say airspeed."
N123YZ: "AIRSPEED!"
ATC: "N123YZ, say cancel IFR."
N123YZ: "Eight thousand feet, one hundred fifty knots indicated."

(Holy crap, someone stop me.

)


A DC-10 had an exceedingly long roll out after landing with his approach speed just a little too high.

San Jose Tower: "American 751 heavy, turn right at the end, if able. If not able, take the Guadeloupe exit off of Highway 101 and make a right at the light to return to the airport."

(I remember that one, one of the first ones I ever came across a couple of years back.

)

 

[HCFarms96]

A linguistics professor was lecturing his class the other day. "In English," he said, "a double negative forms a positive. However, in some languages, such as Russian, a double negative remains a negative. But there isn't a single language, not one, in which a double positive can express a negative."
A voice from the back of the room retorted, "Yeah, right."

That's great! Busted out laughing when I read that! Read it out loud to by Mom and she laughed, too

 

[Fierlin1182]

It came from a book of Aussie jokes. I don't think it actually originates in Australia though.

 

[Zinnia-Hen]

ray's two cents :

Tower: Mission 123, do you have problems?
Pilot: I think, I have lost my compass.
Tower: Judging the way you are flying, you lost the whole instrument panel!


A young and stupid pilot wanted to sound cool on the aviation frequencies.
So, this one time he was approaching a field during the night time.
Instead of making any official requests to the tower, he said: "Guess who?"
The controller switched the field lights off and replied: "Guess where!"


ATC: Piper N 4444D, traffic at your 2o'clock, 500 ft below you.
Piper N4444D: Well, we see a light coming towards us ...
ATC: Look again - there's probably a plane behind that light.


ATC: "N123YZ, say altitude."
N123YZ: "ALTITUDE!"
ATC: "N123YZ, say airspeed."
N123YZ: "AIRSPEED!"
ATC: "N123YZ, say cancel IFR."
N123YZ: "Eight thousand feet, one hundred fifty knots indicated."

(Holy crap, someone stop me.

)


A DC-10 had an exceedingly long roll out after landing with his approach speed just a little too high.

San Jose Tower: "American 751 heavy, turn right at the end, if able. If not able, take the Guadeloupe exit off of Highway 101 and make a right at the light to return to the airport."

(I remember that one, one of the first ones I ever came across a couple of years back.

)

Semi-random here, but I lived near the San Jose Airport.

For a second there, I was wondering why "Guadeloupe exit" & "Highway 101" sounded so familiar.

I've been on both of those and have flown with the San Jose Airport.​

 

[sourland]

Originally Aussie or not, it's funny.

 

[Fierlin1182]

That's awesome! I have no idea where any of the places mentioned are, it was just a funny joke.

Sounds south American to me, for some reason.

 

[Fierlin1182]

More from our "Don't get wise with us" file:

A United Airlines 747 captain tries to make light banter with Sydney, Australia, Approach Control ...

Captain: "Good morning, Sydney, this is United XXX, we're 50 miles out and have your island in sight ..."

Approach: "Roger, United ... you're cleared to circle the island twice, then it's okay to land."


(Okay, that is great! I bet it was United 840. Or maybe United 841. Which one is the arrival again? I can never remember.

)