Okies in the BYC The Original

[artsyrobin]

Quote:
Thanks! will try that.... hopefully it will come back to life...

 

[smfamf]

Quote:
You are gonna come visit us, right? I mean we will be only a few minutes away and we might need some chicken talk.

 

[smfamf]

Quote:
LOL. Do you know when it will be. I may just have to wait and get some administrative advice on my new pens. I designed it all out on paper and it looked good. It measured out to have plenty of room for all birds. I took a couple of cans of spray paint and marked it out on the ground. Uhh, that looks way too small!! At least that is what I said to Jordan, my helper, and we stopped halfway and decided to hit the drawing board again.

POOPS Haves/Wants list coming soon.

 

[Buckguy20]

Quote:
I heard a story about a woman who was driving and had her three year old daughter in the back seat.
As she was driving along, she saw four dead raccons in the road. A whole family.
She didn't want to have to explain things to her DD so she sped up hoping to avoid any questions.
However, the little girl spoke up and asked "what was that Mama?" The woman told her "it was just some wood that fell off of a truck."
The little girl replied, "is that what killed all of those raccoons?"

I don't know why, but that cracked me up.

 

[MAllen]

Quote:
I heard a story about a woman who was driving and had her three year old daughter in the back seat.
As she was driving along, she saw four dead raccons in the road. A whole family.
She didn't want to have to explain things to her DD so she sped up hoping to avoid any questions.
However, the little girl spoke up and asked "what was that Mama?" The woman told her "it was just some wood that fell off of a truck."
The little girl replied, "is that what killed all of those raccoons?"

I don't know why, but that cracked me up.

 

[MAllen]

Now that I have my yearly taxes out of the way & have a chance to reflect on my internet use during 2009 I just wanted to take a moment here to thank all of those who have sent me such educational e-mails over the past year. I've taken them to heart and I'm totally messed up now and have little chance of recovery.

I no longer open a public bathroom door without using a paper towel or have them put lemon slices in my ice water without worrying about the bacteria on the lemon peel.

I can't use the remote in a hotel room because I don't know what the last person was doing while flipping through the adult movie channels.

I can't sit down on the hotel bedspread because I can only imagine what has happened on it since it was last washed.

I have trouble shaking hands with someone who has been driving because the number one pastime while driving alone is picking ones nose (although cell phone usage may be taking the number one spot).

Eating a little snack sends me on a guilt trip because I can only imagine how many gallons of trans fats I have consumed over the years.

I MUST SEND MY SPECIAL THANKS to whoever sent me the one about poop in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet sponge with every envelope that needs sealing.

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl (Penny Brown) who is about to die in the hospital..... somewhere.

I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program.

I no longer eat KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.

I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.

THANKS TO YOU, my email friends, I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

BECAUSE OF YOUR CONCERN, I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.

I no longer can buy gasoline without taking someone along to watch the car so a serial killer won't crawl in my back seat when I'm pumping gas.

I no longer use Saran Wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.

AND THANKS FOR LETTING ME KNOW I can't boil a cup of water in the microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face... disfiguring me for life.

I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.

I no longer receive packages from UPS or Fed Ex since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.

I no longer shop at Target since they are French and don't support our American troops or the Salvation Army.

I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica , Uganda , Singapore , and Uzbekistan .

I no longer buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe, BONUS!!

THANKS TO YOU I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big brown African spider is lurking under the seat to cause me instant death when it bites my butt.

AND THANKS TO YOUR GREAT ADVICE I can't ever pick up $5.00 dropped in the parking lot because it probably was placed there by a sex molester waiting underneath my car to grab my leg..... well... OK, so I still do this one

I can no longer drive my car because I can't buy gas from certain gas companies!

I can't do any gardening because I'm afraid I'll get bitten by the brown recluse and my hand will fall off.

Oh, by the way.....
A German scientist from Argentina , after a lengthy study, has discovered that people with insufficient brain activity read long forum posts with their hand on the mouse.

Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late.... we're all doomed.

 

[Buster52]

 

[Buster52]

 

[Buster52]

 

[Buster52]