Parents who have full access to their kid's Facebook account?

[redhen]

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I just saw this...Are you serious? You realize those teens wouldn't have been able to murder had they had the PROPER supervision? How many of those parents are quoted as saying they had no idea what their kids were up to? If they were monitoring their children, they would have known, and those incidents may have never happened.

Yep..
Plus its called simply being a good, involved parent.

 

[Kschwartz]

I do not get why so many of you do not seem to trust your children..

Its facebook. If you're so concerned about what they are doing on there then just don't let them get one at all, no need to snoop around for no reason. I as a teenager would feel a bit violated if I knew that my parents were CONSTANTLY checking and snooping around my facebook without having a reason for it.. even though I don't have anything to hide; it's still nice to have privacy..

Like I said in my other post, I think a lot of this should and can be resolved by just teaching your kids how to be safe with their stuff and telling them what they can and cannot do, it's not that hard.


Also, if you had suspicions about your child doing something their not supposed to, why not just confront them about it rather than go through their stuff. Yeah go ahead and check if you still believe he/she is hiding something, but at least AFTER you have talked with them about it first.

 

[EmtheFishLady]

I don't think it's a matter of trusting our kids. I just know how much *I* screwed up at that age. My decision making skills were not the best. I don't think any teenager really has the maturity level to make good decisions all the time. I don't make the right ones all the time NOW. As parents, it's our job to help guide our children and keep them from making the same mistakes we did. Montitoring you isn't about trust. It's about responsibility.

 

[acid_chipmunk]

I wasn't going to post on here, but the more I thought about it, the more I needed to.

First: my kids are 11 and 7, so I don't have to worry about social networking yet. They have a computer with internet access. They can only go to sites I have previously approved because of the restrictions I have put on it. This being said, if I EVER found my kids to have a FB account without prior approval from me and without me having the user name and password, they would be done for. As for having MULTIPLE "hidden" accounts, that would be the end of their internet access in my house. That is blatant lying to your parents there, and will NOT be tolerated in my house.

Second: my kids don't have cell phones and won't have them until they drive and have a job to pay for it on their own. There is no reason that kids my daughters age should be texting her friends. If she wants to call and talk to her friends, that is fine. If she wants them to come over, that is fine. A cell phone for texting, I don't think so. Now, this may make me sound like a hypocrite, as I have a smart phone and text a lot, but I work in an environment where I can't always talk on the phone and need to have text to keep in contact during the day. Plus, I have the full-time job that pays for the cell phone.

Third: the door policy is the same in my house! If you are in your room door is open unless you are sleeping. Changing isn't a problem because of the way our house it set up, you can't see into any of the rooms unless you are in them. Slam the door because you are mad at me, off it comes. Don't keep it open when I tell you to, off it comes. Simple as that. My house, I pay for it, my rules. Don't like it, tough.

I was raised with out internet in my house until I was a senior in high school. Back then, there was no Facebook. Heck, I didn't even get on Facebook until I was 26 or 27. My mom treated me the same way about my door. There were no cell phones when I was growing up. I survived and made it to adulthood and parenthood just fine. If that stuff had been around, my mom would have had the passwords, just like she did to my email while I was still living at home.

Am I overprotective of my kids, YES! And rightly so. This world is an awful place, no matter where you are. I work at 911 and my husband works in law enforcement. We see what happens to kids everyday. We see the parents that didn't give a crap and let their kids do anything they wanted. Those are the kids that are doing damage to other peoples property. They are the ones committing violent crimes. It's not the kids who had parents that cared.

My kids may not like my rules, I know I didn't like my Mom's when I was growing up, however now that I am an adult, I see she was protecting me and being a PARENT, not my friend. My kids will see that eventually and thank me for it. Especially once they have kids of their own and have a foundation of how to raise their kids.

 

[redhen]

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Yep.. its not about trust. Is MY responsibility to monitor the minor children living in my house. Anything less is neglectful.
And if you have nothing to hide, why worry about it then?

 

[acid_chipmunk]

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Obviously you have never lied to your parents. Kids lie. I know I did when I was growing up. That is one of the reasons why I would have access to my kids' accounts. If they don't like it, then they don't need to have them. Simple as that. Another reason is, I pay the bills, I buy the computer, I WILL have access. End. Of. Story.

 

[acid_chipmunk]

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Yep.. its not about trust. Is MY responsibility to monitor the minor children living in my house. Anything less is neglectful.
And if you have nothing to hide, why worry about it then?

Agreed with both of you!

 

[redhen]

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I 100% agree.

 

[chicken crazed 1o1]

I think it weird how most kids think that there so cool because they have a cell phone they should get a life ecspeccially the ones in my class

 

[saddina]

In Order:

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And give them time to cover up anything they may be doing wrong? Kinda eliminates the whole point of asking, doesn't it?