***Please try to answer based on the audience you are addressing!***

[ChooksChick]

I have to say something here.

For many new users, the blunt and straightforward way many long-time users on here answer questions seems rude.

I have read many answers that have taken me aback, because they are rather as though the OP ought to have known the answer, or if they ask a second time different way (likely because they didn't understand the answer given) they are treated as though they are being difficult.

Go back and read many posts asking for help lately as though you are a new, inexperienced, frightened and upset chicken-owner! It's not the nice, helpful way a person distressed ought to be treated, many times, and while I'm not saying people ought to sugar-coat, if you are feeling as though you might get snippy in your answer,

*just don't answer*

I'd rather have a vacuum of silence than be made to feel as though I'm being condescended to and made to feel bad about a mistake I may have made in an attempt to save a loved pet.

This is not an attack on any one person- it's something I've wanted to say based on answers in many threads lately, and it makes me feel awful for those newcomers who just need help.

 

[19hhbelgian]

 

[Luna_Chick66]

Well said.

Sometimes the old timers get a little arrogant.

 

[Buck Creek Chickens]

Quote:
your right, some of the snippiest answers come from those who have been posting for awaile, some are down right rude or have nothing to do with the question. if someone can't answer nicely don't answer at all.

 

[mandelyn]

Good point!

It's something that happens when the same answer is given repeatedly, and most anyone is guilty of it after months or years of passing along the same information. The more someone has to "repeat" themselves, the tone aften changes, even though is being said to someone brand new.

It's hard to remember that you're "talking" to someone new, and to not have a tone like it's the 1,000th time you're saying something.

But that's just my take on it, since I'm guilty of it on horse forums.

 

[Reinbeau]

Sometimes the poster is upset and defensive - and sees offense where there is none. Can long-time responders get testy? Yes, especially with simple problems that have been answered time and time again and those answers are easily found via a search. They shouldn't snap back, that does nothing but scare the newbie or upset poster off.

We all understand when someone is upset, they've got a valued or loved hen who is sick, injured, in trouble, torn open, bleeding, etc. and they're scared because they haven't dealt with such a seemingly huge problem before. I have yet to see any of the knowledgeable posters here give that person a hard time - but I have seen those posters who, upset as they are, bite the head off the responder because they've asked for further information, or clarification.

I'll turn this around and say - if you are asking a question here, be thorough with your information, remain calm, and understand that it might take a bit of time to get a good answer - be just as kind back to the responder as you expect them to be to you. This is a two way street here, we need to show respect to the newbie as well as the knowledgeable - and vice-versa.

 

[wombat]

I'm not an old-timer here, but I spent years on a board that answered questions regarding dog problems, and I see the same sorts of things here.

Sometimes an answer isn't arrogant ... if you answer the same questions week after week, it's easy to get a bit brief with the answer, and that might come off as rude.

Also, it's hard to know what the person on the other end of the question already knows. If you post basic info they already know, you're "condescending." If you leave it out and they didn't know it, you might add to their problems.

So there's room for understanding on both sides ... old-timers should take care not to come off as arrogant, but people asking questions shouldn't be too quick to take offense over the answers, either.

 

[DuckLady]

Well said, Ann.

And remember that tone is hard to convey online. Also, when you perceive a person is not as nice as you feel they should be, try to remember that they are human and you have no idea what is going on. Maybe they visited Emergencies to find help for themselves over somethign catastrophic and paused to try to offer help.
You just don't know.

And this is the internet. You need to have a thicker skin than in person, because you don't have the tone and body language to accompany the written word.

 

[speckledhen]

Well-said.