Processing Day Support Group ~ HELP us through the Emotions PLEASE!

[Sally Sunshine]

Thanks for all of this. It helps a lot. I am, of course, keeping that stiff upper lip in front of my kids, explained that it was very important to be respectful and how this is the food they eat. I don't know why I personally feel so dang bad. I know it's stupid since I have eaten chicken all my life. My family is a hunting family and they will see deer shot and gutted, etc. They have eaten venison and wild turkey. They love to tell the story of how they once bit into shot while eating a turkey. I know this is good for them in the long run and LeafBlade, I've already said next time, we will do this or that and my middle boy looked at me and said "next time??"

Its a start and like I said in our message, keep it real! there are few of us compared to those that are clueless! KIDS need this, do you know last time we processed a few months ago, I had bunch of kids come home off the bus and I stopped processing and covered it all up, and would you believe all four parents with their kids asked if they could watch and see the process and the kids were just fine, some were grossed but we did explain EVERYTHING to them, and the parents thanked us for opening THEIR minds up as well, for it was something they needed to see too. I thought that was so cool of the parents. MIND you we dont live in a big city or town here, so our folks are pretty tough and simple people, so not sure that would go well in a neighborhood lol

you should try a few meat birds at some point. I am glad we did! they are not as gross as people say they are!

 

[Fire Ant Farm]

Ok jumping on this thread because we harvested our first chicken today. I was worried more about my kids but they seem fine. My middle boy is a little off but the rest seem fine. We are about to have chicken pot pie for dinner and I still feel awful. This was a dual purpose bird that turned out to be a rooster. We knew the plan including eating any roosters. I know that it is good for my kids to know where their food comes from but I still feel terrible...

Why do you think that is? You've eaten chicken before this?

I can't speak for lanaschix, but I thought about this A LOT after doing my cull. I completely believed in what I was doing and how right it was for many reasons, and it took be a little while to nail down exactly what it was that made me feel bad or sad about it. And I think for me at least it comes down to this: These birds have trusted me and looked to me to feed them and protect them and keep them warm and happy ever since they were hatched. Even if I always intended to eat them, they still began the culling day with total trust in me to care for them. That is probably the primary source of any unpleasant emotions I have had about it. But that's what a good farmer that raises meat does. I come from a long line of city folk - for someone who has not kept livestock before, but only pets, this is a mental adjustment that I need to work to make quite consciously.

I have found that it helps to identify the source of "feeling terrible" (whether logical or not) and look it square in the face. Lanaschix, it may be helpful to work on identifying exactly what it was that made you feel so bad, not only so you can better adapt and adjust as this becomes part of your life, but also to assist in the conversations you may have with your children.

Just a thought...

- Ant Farm

 

[Beekissed]

Quote: Yep. Those are the ones. They are the same ones that think you are traumatizing your chickens if you kill chickens in front of your chickens. Nothing to base that on whatsoever, but they imagine it will traumatize the chicken because THEY would be traumatized if someone killed another human in front of them, they reason. But are they truly traumatized when they see another human killed? They see it depicted on TV in scenes so real one cannot tell it from the real thing and will snack on food as they watch it. No trauma at all.

It's all twisted thinking and it's getting worse and worse each day. I don't have any patience at all with it...as you might have noticed.

 

[Sally Sunshine]

who was it who said very early in this thread and I have to admit I tell myself each time I have to do the deed for each individual chicken, along with a short blessing and thankyou.... something like this......



you never have to be happy when you take a life, never go at it like its something you enjoy.

this has changed me for each bird and made it easier, it gives me time to take a deep breath and remember to keep it real

 

[Sally Sunshine]

Over the years I've noticed that kids usually take their cue from their parents on such things, so if their parents are acting like this is a traumatizing or unusual thing to be doing, the kids will do so also. They will be looking to you on how to process the things they've seen and have done in regards to their food supply. I'm thinking if you want them to process this in a healthy manner and to be able to rationalize that chicken is chicken, whether it comes from your yard or the store, you will have to set the right example on it. No grimacing or acting like it's unusual, no vocalizations of how it may be hurting the chicken or how sad it is that he is dying or dead, etc.

In the old days it was called keeping a stiff upper lip and it was a valuable tool for teaching youngsters how to do the same. There's nothing wrong in feeling sorrow for a life taken, but with that sorrow there needs to some common sense and viewing the event from a bigger perspective than how it makes you feel during the moment. It's a great teaching moment and can mean the world of difference for the child to see their parents being strong in the face of a difficult task.

this comes into play with a lot of things with kiddos! The minute someone coddles its downhill from there, my boys are tough and strong because I was pretty tough on them. We had family issues one time and the XMIL was all on the boys like ohhh your poor things and yadda yadda! me and the X cut her off and told her she should NEVER act like that in front of them again.

I am a mean mom can you tell

But I to tell you I am proud of my older sons, out of college, making more $ than I could ever imagine, both have houses and loving wives! SO i did something right!

 

[Beekissed]

Quote:
I so agree! That's why I asked that question. Explore why you feel bad and be honest with yourself. Does it come from within or does it come from without? From expectations and irrational thinking out there that says someone is being cruel if they kill an animal and THEN eat it, but somehow not a bit cruel if they just eat it after some nameless person in some mysterious place they don't want to hear about has killed a nameless chicken raised in another place they don't want to hear about?

I have come to believe that a person who does not supervise the humane killing of the birds they raise so tenderly are the cruel ones. Yep, I said that. It's my responsibility to nurture that bird clear up until the very last day, kill it in full health and well being~before it sickens and dies in torment, and use their bodies for what they were intended. Anything less is a disservice to my good chickens. I can't imagine letting them die of old age or illness and letting them get sick before I gave them a humane cull. It's my job to give them a good day every day but the last day and even that isn't so bad. It's done quietly and without drama, no chasing or nervous energy on my part. They trust me to take care of them and I do, right up to their very last breath I am there, seeing that they don't suffer any more than they have to. Then I don't waste their life by not eating them, as some do. I enjoy them down to the very last bit of their energy.

We have a bond, my chickens and I, and they will watch me kill their flock mates and still trust me that very same hour, just as they have every other day. I have been given stewardship and dominion over them by their Creator and I take it quite seriously. Very seriously. I have to answer for my actions with His good animals that He has entrusted to my care and I don't take that lightly. I have to stand up and answer for it all. It's that big.

 

[Fire Ant Farm]

I so agree! That's why I asked that question. Explore why you feel bad and be honest with yourself. Does it come from within or does it come from without? From expectations and irrational thinking out there that says someone is being cruel if they kill an animal and THEN eat it, but somehow not a bit cruel if they just eat it after some nameless person in some mysterious place they don't want to hear about has killed a nameless chicken raised in another place they don't want to hear about?

I have come to believe that a person who does not supervise the humane killing of the birds they raise so tenderly are the cruel ones. Yep, I said that. It's my responsibility to nurture that bird clear up until the very last day, kill it in full health and well being~before it sickens and dies in torment, and use their bodies for what they were intended. Anything less is a disservice to my good chickens. I can't imagine letting them die of old age or illness and letting them get sick before I gave them a humane cull. It's my job to give them a good day every day but the last day and even that isn't so bad. It's done quietly and without drama, no chasing or nervous energy on my part. They trust me to take care of them and I do, right up to their very last breath I am there, seeing that they don't suffer any more than they have to. Then I don't waste their life by not eating them, as some do. I enjoy them down to the very last bit of their energy.

We have a bond, my chickens and I, and they will watch me kill their flock mates and still trust me that very same hour, just as they have every other day. I have been given stewardship and dominion over them by their Creator and I take it quite seriously. Very seriously. I have to answer for my actions with His good animals that He has entrusted to my care and I don't take that lightly. I have to stand up and answer for it all. It's that big.

When I finished eating the first chicken I culled, I took the carcass, three necks, and five feet (one from each of four named Naked Necks that were culled, plus the culled abnormal pullet), added three quarts of water, a large chunk of fresh ginger, a carrot, an onion, and a cinnamon stick. It was they very best soup I have ever had, and it intentionally contained parts of most of the birds I culled.

I called it Love Soup.

- Ant Farm

 

[Sally Sunshine]

When I finished eating the first chicken I culled, I took the carcass, three necks, and five feet (one from each of four named Naked Necks that were culled, plus the culled abnormal pullet), added three quarts of water, a large chunk of fresh ginger, a carrot, an onion, and a cinnamon stick. It was they very best soup I have ever had, and it intentionally contained parts of most of the birds I culled.

I called it Love Soup.

- Ant Farm

 

[Beekissed]

That's exactly how I feel about the soup I eat from mine...it's all my love in a jar, then I feed it to my family in love too. It's hours, days, months of my work and fellowship with that good animal for the purpose of letting it fulfill its life here on Earth and then I get to provide good, nutritious and healthy food to my family in a world where that is increasingly hard to find.

It's all about love for me.

 

[jimbob86]

Quote: Anthropomorphizing- Assigning human emotions to animals- and it's a load of crap: They are chickens, and if you kill one, pluck and draw it right in front of the rest of the whole flock, you can toss the contents of their deceased flockmate's crop to them and they will eat it with the same alacrity the deceased did the first go-round.

Quote:
Well, they live in a world of make-believe, and KNOW IT....... they know the televisor is telling them a story....... they are comfortable with that......it's when stuff gets REAL that they are out of their element and can't function ...... and disparage those who can ..... and I can't fathom why......