I think I know what Deb is going through..... It's harder to deal with when it's a child or grandchild of a DQ. They live through their progeny.
I worked with a woman who had Everything Worse Than You Or Me or Anyone Else. That character on SNL makes me laugh because it was almost like that. Really.
This gal had a brain cancer scare after I was diagnosed with breast cancer. She spoke of uterine ablation years earlier when I had a vaginal hysterectomy. Her tonsils grew back when someone had theirs out, and the new set went bad, too.
We always suspected she would grow a third breast and get cancer in it, or her gall bladder and appendix would simultaneously rupture, because a co-worker broke an ankle, and this gal talked about having had broken a leg in TEN places as child.
She performed CPR on the roadside with a complete stranger, she said, dialing 9-1-1 between compressions, and saved him, when I marvelled about my (then) boyfriend performing the Heimlich maneuver on a restaurant guest at the table next to ours.... (the restaurant didn't comp the fellow's meal! The staff just stood around whilst the guy choked. We thought wait persons had training; well, my BF was an officer and EMT and he got up, went over, did his thing, checked on the guy, and came back and sat down. The patient also finished his meal... Nice little story until the DQ heard it and had to top it.)