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rant: At some point it's time to GROW UP!

Discussion in 'Random Ramblings' started by Rhett&SarahsMom, May 11, 2009.

  1. Rhett&SarahsMom

    Rhett&SarahsMom Songster

    May 8, 2008
    Usually it happens shortly after the 1st child is born. You wake up one morning and realize that YOU are a PARENT. No longer can you run off for kidless vacations to Cancun. No longer are your "long" weekends relaxing. You are a PARENT.

    But then there are some that just dont seem to grasp this. Even after their second, third or more child arrives.
    And when your immediate family. Your parents, sister, brother. And your extended family ie aunts uncles. And your CLOSE friends. The ones you often have your kids hang out with their kids. Stop answering your phone calls and emails when you "NEED" someone to watch your children OVER NIGHT. When even your family is suddenly busy. Or is suddenly picking up more hours on the weekend. Despite the fact they too have kids. They are trying to make you realize that YOU NEED TO GROW UP!

    case in point. Email received from a mom that we dont see for YEARS at a time. Seriously. We havent seen these guys for over a YEAR! And last time they were here the boys were MONSTERS

    I realize you have an event up in NH on May BLAHth.
    However, I was wondering if you guys would even remotely be up for / willing to take our boys from sometime after 6-7pm (or earlier or later, but we have coverage up till 5pm and it's about a 2 hour drive) on Saturday, until around 2-3pm on Sunday.

    My Dad is willing to watch them for part of the weekend - from Friday afternoon until Saturday around 5pm - but we haven't yet found someone to take them for the remainder of the weekend. My sister and brother are working, one of my sisters is not returning my calls, my cousin is busy, etc. etc. Our sitter is also graduating on Sunday, so we don't even have that option!

    As I said, my dad will take them till around 5pm or so, and he's in H", MA, so if we didn't pick them up til 5pm, it wold be 7pm-ish at the earliest that we would be able to drop them off.

    I'm still seeing if my sister can take them (and thus not have us shuttling them around), but in the chance she fails to get back to me, would you be willing/able to take them?

    Thanks again, and sorry for imposing!

    Yeah. I am going to be up at 6am and going ALL DAY. Then getting home and taking care of my animals and house. I am taking my kid with me.

    BTW.. the thing they are going to? It's a game. Where mom and dad dress up like "elves" and run around in the woods throwing little seed filled fabric packets at other people in costume while yelling "spells"
    It is NOT a work related thing. It is NOT life or death.
    My dh played until our daughter was a year old. Then decided spending time with her and I was more fun.
    Also. I do not have a place for these kids to sleep. We do not have another bed. We do not have carpeted floors. We do have a dog that has run of the house, that I am not about to lock up overnight.
    These kids do not know my dh or I. They have been here in our home once. Keep em overnight? Is this chick on crack?

    Why are these "parents" not getting the GIANT hints that their family is sending? Their family doenst want to do this anymore. It's obvious.
    She emailed me last month that the entire FAMILY suddenly was unavailable. Really? Shocking!

    My mom would have sat me down by this time and given me the what for. If I had been like this. Which I was not. I sold my "toys" when I had my daughter. My events/hobbies are things I can take my kid to.
    My mom willingly takes my daughter. She is al;ready making summer plans!

    Luckily. I have plans for that morning. When we get back we are meeting my MIL for her birthday And the next day we are taking our dd to my work.

    I want so SO badly to respond with "No. sorry. Maybe your family is trying to tell you something."

  2. gabrielle1976

    gabrielle1976 Crowing

    Feb 21, 2009
    Columbia river gorge
    Some people never get it , I have a friend and though I love her I feel she could use a LOT of help in the parenting department , she started putting her kid in child care The DAY she came home from the hospital , She didnt work at the time . [​IMG]
  3. Duncan

    Duncan In the Brooder

    Mar 12, 2009
    Duncan, SC
    We have to have a license to drive a car, register to vote , etc. We should have one to became parents too.
  4. DuckLady

    DuckLady ~~~Administrator~~~BYC Store Support Staff Member

    Jan 11, 2007
    NE Washington State
    Do you care if you offend her?
    If not, maybe you should send what you wrote. [​IMG]
    She needs to hear it and it sounds like her family has not said anything or she is not hearing them.
  5. Rhett&SarahsMom

    Rhett&SarahsMom Songster

    May 8, 2008
    Quote:they are "kind of" friends of my dh's Although he hasnt seen them in ages. They dont invite us to parties for their boys. They dont come to parties we invite them to. Granted we are a good hour and half away. But we plan stuff for weekends. And the last party I invited them to was for my dh's birthday.. and it was only 15 minutes from them.
    BTW these are the same people that sent email invites to their wedding and never sent even an email "thank you" for the gift we sent them.
    So obviously they are lacking in more than parenting skills.

    I dont know.. I emailed her the truth. That we are going out to dinner with Saturday night and then meeting some friends for drinks. I also "nicely" let her know that my dh, daughter and I are usually busy doing things as a family on the weekends. Which we are. Since he gets home from work after 8 during the week and the weekends are our family time. I mean we will drop our dd off with my mom an hit a movie(a movie a weekend the last the last two weeks!) But it is only by both my daughters and my moms request that I leave her there for an overnight or a week. I have only left her with my mom or MIL overnight when I have an event to work the next day. I would never even think of asking a "friend" to keep her overnight. Especially so that dh and I could go play in the woods. That's just absurd IMHO
  6. I don't know. I mean my kids are my life and I gave up nearly everything for my family, to be Mom and Wife. BUT, I still think that Mom and Dad do need down time away from kids now and then. My husband and I need time alone together to refresh and enjoy being adults only with adults, it makes us better parents. We come back with alot more patience and understanding.
    A family member takes our three kids one day a week for several hours so that we may have adult time. Either I go to work with him and watch movies (he's a manager at a movie theater) or we go out on a date night.
    We have asked people to watch our kids so we could go see a movie we have waited for for ages, or to go get a new book that came out, or to go to a concert or something. There are times when I need to do something for work while my husband is working and I need a sitter too... But when we ask for a special babysitting session we give up our one day a week that MIL takes the kids. We don't then get two days that week...
    Our family loves our kids though and they don't mind, nobody has ever tried to avoid us or anything and we watch our nephews and nieces in return.
    You're kinda making me feel guilty now though...
    I sure hope I'm not one of those people [​IMG]
    I've never thought about it.
    Last edited: May 11, 2009
  7. gabrielle1976

    gabrielle1976 Crowing

    Feb 21, 2009
    Columbia river gorge
    I cant speak from experance with the whole letting others watch youre kid , Im a sigle mom and have 2 family members that dont like to watch my son, I go to a movie about 2 times a year and once a month my mom has started to watch him for 30 min while I wiegh in across teh street for TOPS , thats it I always have him other wise unless he is in school , it dosnt matter if Im deathly ill or its the week end or my birthday or anything else. Some times I wish someone one anyone would help me but they dont and thats fine because I CHOOSE to have a child and if that means I dont get a free day to my self till he is 18 then I made that choice no one else. Would I let soemone watch him once a week for me to go out or soemthing , probly will I hunt people down for this no , I have an MRI on my neck and upper spine and no one is willing to watch him so he is going wityh me like usuall, I had a sleep study done in the hospital my sister took him home but he fussed so I ended up with a baby in my hospital room during that as well .
    Your a parent , do you need time to yourself Probly , is it other peoples responsbiltiy to watch yorue kid so you can go out Nope.

  8. Quote:Well of course. We don't hunt people down or force them to take our kids, and we don't gripe if no one does. It was our MIL's idea to take them once a week 4 years ago and we have done it on and off ever since.
    We homeschool so we have kids all the time.

    If I lived near you, I'd watch your son so you could do your MRI!
  9. BTW.. the thing they are going to? It's a game. Where mom and dad dress up like "elves" and run around in the woods throwing little seed filled fabric packets at other people in costume while yelling "spells".

    That sounds like something a child would enjoy [​IMG]
    No sitter necessary.

  10. gabrielle1976

    gabrielle1976 Crowing

    Feb 21, 2009
    Columbia river gorge
    Quote:That sounds like something a child would enjoy [​IMG]
    No sitter necessary.


    I shure would take my son to that lol he would have a blast smacking people with fake spells and dressing up [​IMG]

    Oh and I wasnt pointing any fingers people that ahve someone to watch there kids so they can have a break are lucky , I just dont think it should be something that people Expect others to do , if that makes any sense at all . I have the missfortune to not only be a single parent but to have a small uncopertave family, but it puts my life in perspective to me wich is always a good thing ,
    With star trek out Ill be useing all my cards to see if I can get to go , I dont think it would be 4 year old freindly, so if I dobnt have a sitter ill just have to netflix it later.
    Last edited: May 11, 2009

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