*sigh* I'm loosing my touch. (Warning: Hi-jacked by Em)

[Spookwriter]

In Alaska does one have to mow the grass during the six days of summer?

 

[sourland]

In Alaska does one have to mow the grass during the six days of summer?

I think that the voles generally take care of the grass.

 

[Spookwriter]

Okay Alaskan, you've really got to stay on one thread...
it confuses the heck of me when you get in the wrong place.

(I'm easily confused)

But the best way to keep the voles out of your pantry
involves a few sticks of dynamite. You do have a few
sticks thawed out, don't you?

First, take all your food out of the panty. (You might want
to store it at the neighbors while we rid you of the voles.)

Then wait until the empty pantry gets full of the voles hunting
for your food.

Light a few sticks, throw in the pantry, close the door and run.

Do not stop running until you hear a big "boom".

Then you can go back and wal-la...no more voles. Problem
solved.


Spook....who use to be an exterminator years ago. I still have
some dynamite left if you need a few sticks.


P.S. You may need to call your insurance agent after we get
rid of the voles.

 

[Tanichca]

I would read your whole post, Spook... But I saw that at one point, you left out the r in pantry, and my dirty mind caused me to start giggling. Is that what you're wearing under your sheet?

 

[DDNONIN2016]

In Alaska does one have to mow the grass during the six days of summer?

Now that is funny

 

[Bunnylady]

I saw you flirting over there on the front porch, Spook.

Trying to cadge some goodies and get someone to push you in the swing. Tsk, tsk.

Not trying to hijack that one, too, are you?

But y'know, I've advocated dynamite as pest control for years.

Around here, one of the major lawn pests are some little beasties called ground pearls.

My treatment of choice is about 20 sticks of dynamite per acre. For some reason, nobody has wanted to let me try it.

 

[Alaskan]

Ah no sweet lady!

When it is green and lovely outside, then all the voles leave my house to play in the sun. The one I heard last night must be a bit slow to move out, waiting for real grass perhaps. My house will then be vole free until it is cold outside, then all of the rodents in a one mile radius will come to live in my nice and toasty house.

It is always so nice, to look out at the freshly fallen snow, and see the many rodent tracks that all lead to my door.


However, the time of no snow is the time when my arch-nemesis are the Golden Crowned Sparrows! I hear their laughter as they descend in locust like swarms, eating every pea plant, every flower bud, in their path!!

They are VICIOUS little buggers! Like flying piranhas! In a flash, your lovely vegetable bed is only dirt, EXCEPT FOR THE WEEDS!

Yes, that is right boys and girls, they do not eat weeds, just peas, lettuce, spinach, all cute blooming plants, any plant you actually treasure! They have "Alaskan likes THIS plant, so we will EAT IT!" Power!

Alaskan... Who is very very close to snow free

 

[Alaskan]

In Alaska does one have to mow the grass during the six days of summer?

Well....the locals here qualify any day that reaches or exceeds 60 F as"summer".

Last year we had maybe eight days of summer. but the grass grows just great as long as we stay above 40.

But...no mowing yet, my grass isn't all green yet. I have been able to find a few baby dandelions to feed to the chickens.... I did see some BLOOMING dandelions in town today! WHOOT!

 

[Alaskan]

Okay Alaskan, you've really got to stay on one thread...
it confuses the heck of me when you get in the wrong place.

(I'm easily confused)

Huh? (Alaskan looks down, yep...in the right place. )

But the best way to keep the voles out of your pantry
involves a few sticks of dynamite. You do have a few
sticks thawed out, don't you?

First, take all your food out of the panty. (You might want
to store it at the neighbors while we rid you of the voles.)

How much food do you think I store?

Why would I store my food in a panty?

Now Alaskan is very confused

Then wait until the empty pantry gets full of the voles hunting
for your food.

Light a few sticks, throw in the pantry, close the door and run.

Do not stop running until you hear a big "boom".

Then you can go back and wal-la...no more voles. Problem
solved.


Spook....who use to be an exterminator years ago. I still have
some dynamite left if you need a few sticks.


P.S.    You may need to call your insurance agent after we get
rid of the voles.

To really get rid of the voles, I should just burn everything down. That will take care of the voles, the mess, the clutter, and so many things!

Alaskan... Currently in DAY ONE OF SUMMER....we hit 65!!!!

 

[sourland]

Alaskan... Currently in DAY ONE OF SUMMER....we hit 65!!!!

It was a whomping 64 degrees F today in good old NJ.