So...those of you that have had to do the liquid diet for a procedure-

[NancyDz]

Good Luck SHelly! I did this last year... it's tough to get that gallon down and you spend a lot of time on the toilet. A it goes right through you. Also make sure you have some soft toilet paper and maybe some wet wipes too... ( sorry gross I know but details that help when you go through it. ) the procedure was a breeze, i even woke up towards the end and watched the screen... it was wild and I was looped up

But really the worse part is the
drinking the gallon, plug your nose and follow it with chicken broth as that was the only thing that got the taste out of my mouth. My dad died of colon cancer so I will suffer through this procedure regularly but it's worth it.


Good luck !

 

[The Chicken Lady]

Sometimes, you can get a powder than you can mix up with water and drink instead of the liquid drink from the pharmacy.

I forget what it's called, but DH gets that kind because he's allowed to mix the powder with Gatorade, which tastes much better. If you have to have another exam eventually, see if you can get the powder.

 

[sred98]

BLEAH!!!

I've gotten the glass bottle and then the big tub of stuff you mix up. One down, one to go! I almost lost it on the last little bit of the big tub.

Oh...and found a PUPPY locked in my chicken house storage area...no food, no water.

I think my oldest son (10) stuck it in there yesterday, as best I can tell, and forgot to tell me when he went to his friend's house.

Sweet dog, ignores the chickens, licks the horses, but I think it belongs to someone. I put a found ad on Craigslist.

I've got to drink my last bit in one hour and 20 minutes!

Then, I'll be done!

Thanks for the encouragement!

Shelly

 

[beak]

I threw up the stuff they give you for cleaning out the night before. They said it was no problem. They only did the 1st third of my colon, so I was awake for the whole thing. It was embarrassing when the camera was showing where it was headed on the 27" TV screen. Then after that I had to have a lower GI and the catheter slipped out and was spraying that chalk stuff everywhere. If you have a lower GI be sure to drink a lot of water to flush the chalk out. I didn't drink enough and it turned in to a log. Yes it was unpleasant.

 

[CoyoteMagic]

I had one a couple years ago. Psyio-soda (sp?) 2 little bitty bottles I mixed with 7-up. It was AWFUL!!! I didn't even manage to get the first glass down before it all started moving along!!

Only thing I can recommend is................... grease your butt! After it all starts moving you will be happy there is a little buffer between your butt and the TP. Beings you will be going every 2minutes!!

 

[Sugar Sand Farm]

On the lighter side. My broathr just emailed this to my DH thought you could use a laugh.
ABOUT THE WRITER
Dave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winning humor columnist for the Miami Herald.





Colonoscopy Journal:

I called my friend Andy Sable, a gastroenterologist, to make an appointment for a colonoscopy.


A few days later, in his office, Andy showed me a color diagram of the colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point passing briefly through Minneapolis.



Then Andy explained the colonoscopy procedure to me in a thorough, reassuring and patient manner.


I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn't really hear anything he said, because my brain was shrieking, 'HE'S GOING TO STICK A TUBE 17,000 FEET UP YOUR BEHIND!'


I left Andy's office with some written instructions, and a prescription for a product called 'MoviPrep,' which comes in a box large enough to hold a microwave oven. I will discuss MoviPrep in detail later; for now suffice it to say that we must never allow it to fall into the hands of America's enemies.


I spent the next several days productively sitting around being nervous.


Then, on the day before my colonoscopy, I began my preparation. In accordance with my instructions, I didn't eat any solid food that day; all I had was chicken broth, which is basically water, only with less flavor.


Then, in the evening, I took the MoviPrep. You mix two packets of powder together in a one-liter plastic jug, then you fill it with lukewarm water. (For those unfamiliar with the metric system, a liter is about 32 gallons). Then you have to drink the whole jug. This takes about an hour, because MoviPrep tastes - and here I am being kind - like a mixture of goat spit and urinal cleanser, with just a hint of lemon.


The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great sense of humor, state that after you drink it, 'a loose, watery bowel movement may result.'


This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground.


MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don't want to be too graphic, here, but, have you ever seen a space-shuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with you as the shuttle. There are times when you wish the commode had a seat belt. You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently. You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally empty, you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet.


After an action-packed evening, I finally got to sleep.


The next morning my wife drove me to the clinic. I was very nervous. Not only was I worried about the procedure, but I had been experiencing occasional return bouts of MoviPrep spurtage. I was thinking, 'What if I spurt on Andy?' How do you apologize to a friend for something like that? Flowers would not be enough.


At the clinic I had to sign many forms acknowledging that I understood and totally agreed with whatever the heck the forms said. Then they led me to a room full of other colonoscopy people, where I went inside a little curtained space and took off my clothes and put on one of those hospital garments designed by sadist perverts, the kind that, when you put it on, makes you feel even more naked than when you are actually naked..


Then a nurse named Eddie put a little needle in a vein in my left hand. Ordinarily I would have fainted, but Eddie was very good, and I was already lying down. Eddie also told me that some people put vodka in their MoviPrep.
At first I was ticked off that I hadn't thought of this, but then I pondered what would happen if you got yourself too tipsy to make it to the bathroom, so you were staggering around in full Fire Hose Mode. You would have no choice but to burn your house.


When everything was ready, Eddie wheeled me into the procedure room, where Andy was waiting with a nurse and an anesthesiologist. I did not see the 17,000-foot tube, but I knew Andy had it hidden around there somewhere. I was seriously nervous at this point.


Andy had me roll over on my left side, and the anesthesiologist began hooking something up to the needle in my hand.


There was music playing in the room, and I realized that the song was 'Dancing Queen' by ABBA. I remarked to Andy that, of all the songs that could be playing during this particular procedure, 'Dancing Queen' had to be the least appropriate.


'You want me to turn it up?' said Andy, from somewhere behind me.


'Ha ha,' I said. And then it was time, the moment I had been dreading for more than a decade. If you are squeamish, prepare yourself, because I am going to tell you, in explicit detail, exactly what it was like.


I have no idea. Really. I slept through it. One moment, ABBA was yelling 'Dancing Queen, feel the beat of the tambourine,' and the next moment, I was back in the other room, waking up in a very mellow mood.


Andy was looking down at me and asking me how I felt. I felt excellent. I felt even more excellent when Andy told me that It was all over, and that my colon had passed with flying colors. I have never been prouder of an internal organ.



On the subject of Colonoscopies...
Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during the exam were quite humorous..... A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients (predominately male) while he was performing their colonoscopies:


1. 'Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!'


2. 'Find Amelia Earhart yet?'


3. 'Can you hear me NOW?'


4. 'Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?'


5. 'You know, in Arkansas , we're now legally married.'


6. 'Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?'


7. 'You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out...'


8. 'Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!'


9. 'If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!'


10. 'Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity.'


11. 'You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?'


12. 'God, now I know why I am not gay.'


And the best one of all:
13. 'Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?'




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[Judy]

This is honestly the first time I have laughed out loud at a post here.

 

[deerman]

Well I went thru this three times in a year.

Clear liquid , nothing with a red color, In place of the gallen they can give you pills.

Take 2 every 15 min. with 6oz. of clear liquid, stay in a room next to the bathroom.

Think it was a total of 20 pills, its the best way, no bad taste took mine with 7up.

Test, nothing to it. Good luck

 

[deerman]

I would like to add to this post PLEASE DO NOT put this test off.

So many people fear the test as I did for years. Nothing to the test ,yep you sleep thru it. The prep will the pills not bad either.

Colon Cancer takes years to form, it can with this test be prevented.

I put these test off for years, only went for the test after having trouble. Now I am fighting stage 3 colon cancer. This could have been stop if the tumor had been remove before it turn to cancer.

 

[sred98]

Quote:
I agree. My MIL was diagnosed with stage 4 when she was 56. She barely got to see her first grandchild before she passed. By the time they had found it, it had metastisized to her lungs, liver, and brain. She was having chronic bronchitis/asthma type symptoms and they found it on a chest xray. If she had gone for a colonoscopy when she was first having trouble years ago, she would still be here.

There isn't a day that goes by that her family doesn't miss her.

My FIL goes for one regularly now...which is amazing, because he hates doctors.

I'm getting ready to leave, got most of it down.

I accidentally puked into the last cup of the Moviprep, so I decided to toss it. I think that's ok!

The drinking was definitely the worst. If I have to have any more, I will definitely ask about the pills! Thanks for posting that!

Deerman-good luck with your battle.

Shelly