Starting new support group - EOLWDP

[okiechick57]

I can SO NOT relate to the glass 1/2 full thingy........I be a ray of sunshine all the time

 

[PurpleChicken]

Me theme song "It's a great day to be alive" by Travis Tritt.
Think it's a coincidence our son's name is Travis?

Two points/Questions:

Is he a pessimist to everyone or just you?? Most people who know me think
I'm happy and upbeat but my wife may disagree (a little)

Sounds to me like he is suffering from a form of anxiety. Depression
is a symptom, not the disease. If everything is lousy than it can't get worse.
The meds he took may have alleviated the anxiety and made him better.

It also sounds like YOU have FAITH, probably something he is lacking.

 

[nccountrygirl]

Last year when my DH almost died from complications from Cancer I came to the point where I really did not care if I lost every thing we had. Oh I knew that we needed a home to live in but I needed My husband more. It was during all those days and nights in UNC that I came to realize how short life was and a house can be replaced but loved ones can not. I wish you luck with this, your husband is wasting precious time worrying over things that are so irrelevant in the grand scheme of things.

 

[quadcam79]

I think it's just the way us guys are...
same thing for my house, my GF always looks at the positive and I focus on the negative. she says i'm getting better since we moved and have our own house in the country.

I think we get grumpier as we get older lol

 

[okiechick57]

Quote:
well spoken PC
AND you to N.C..........

 

[ruth]

Quote:
Beefy, I always love your posts. You're right. That was really my point in the beginning. "It's just the way he is" - didn't need to have it psycho-analyzed. He has his good points too but I don't need to form a support group for those. My original post was a light hearted attempt at calling all optimist-living-with-pessimist together and share experiences and suggestions. I never meant for it to get so deep and personal but realized I must have been holding in more than I realized. I truly started out thinking it would be a funny thread.

Here's another funny 1/2 full 1/2 empty story. I just bought 30 hatching eggs and put in bator. Yesterday my husband must have asked me at least twice "how many eggs do you have in there"? Each time I said "I don't know. I ordered a dozen each from two different people but one guy sent me extra and I didn't count them - maybe 30 but guy told me to be prepared to fail". That night, in bed, he asked me again "How many eggs do you have in there?" I couldn't help but laugh - I knew exactly what he was thinking. I said "for the first time ever you are thinking positive." He looked at me in shock and said "Positive?" I said "well positive in a negative way. You're thinking every one is going to hatch and we are going to have 30 more chickens as if that's a bad thing" He said "You're right - what are we going to do with 30 more chickens?"

"Oh, I don't know, same thing we do with the other 13 - let them run around property all day long. Maybe make use out of the barns and stables and animal buildings on the property."

As I mentioned my daughter is a therapist and she said that most people create the world they want to live in. I believe that's true - for some there's always chaos/dramas - for others the need to be the victim - for others to always see life through rose colored glasses and for others to always see the empty glass and believe that it will never hold water again.

 

[bantymum]

Wow, My dh can be really miserable and pessimistic and he takes it out on me until I snap and tell him where to go.

I dunno how he could be so mad at me , im the sweet natured, always up for a laugh, try almost anything once type girl.

we disagree on almost everything, however I fob him off and just get on with life.
Yes it can drain you living with the negative vibes, but we must draw an imaginary shell around us to protect us from the heavy burdens of depression.
Keep your chins up, dont allow yourself to become a victim, you are beautiful and dont let anyone tell you otherwise.
So many couples take the divorce option as they give in to the fight and cannot see through the mud.
Divorce isnt the easy way out, either is putting up with the C.r.a.p we just have to try and focus on what we like about each other and yes sometimes we dont like anything!!! somehow we just manage to wake up the next morning in a positive mood and have a great day.
Yes we will bicker one minute and smooch the next but that makes it more interesting.
I was in a wonderful mood this morning until i got to the shops and dicovered that a two year old had just fallen off a second storey balcony next to the shops, shes fighting for her life, I feel very sad but i have learnt to let the sadness leave me as my feelings arent going to help her.
I dont know what the answers are .
Just be kind to yourselves and to others, find a way to give joy to someone. That is all!

 

[fallenweeble]

it's important, when you live with a gloomy sort of fella or gal, to have lots of (non-gloomy) friends, fun outside interests, interesting hobbies, pursuits, etc. etc.
it helps. doesn't fix it. but helps.

hang in there!

 

[hensdeliverthegoods]

You're right. That was really my point in the beginning. "It's just the way he is" - didn't need to have it psycho-analyzed.

My apologies, Ruth. It wasn't my intention to psycho-analyze, but just to offer up some information. I realize you know your own circumstances better than anyone else could.

I must remind myself once again to stick to only reading/posting on chicken-related threads.

 

[Patchofheaven]

Ruth, I think you are dealing with this situation perfectly - "Laughter is always the BEST medicine."