Sticky Situation Advice?

You are obviously a very kind person. Here are a few suggestions:
Make a 'house rules' chart; that way it is not YOUR rules telling them what to do - its the HOUSE rules.

#1 House Rule: No Internet access without you or your husband in the home.
That should free up some of their time to do chores, and, it is a reasonable rule

#2 House Rule: No guests without you or your husband in the home, and, without your permission.

#3 House Rule: The agreed upon 'chore list' will be completed before 5:00 pm. every day.
Sit down with them and make a fair list and all of you sign it.

#4 House Rule: The chicken coop must be dismantled and a new one built to specifications agreed upon by you and the builder and signed by each. Enough said.

Good luck. I hope you get these people out of your home sooner than expected...
 
^ I like those rules.


SO someone did speak to him about the coop because S started talking to me about how she didn't realize what expectations I had (!) and that I didn't make it clear I wanted to keep predators out (um, no, I did when I bought and paid for the more expensive hardwire mesh).... and that she didn't realize I wanted it to 'house quality' not 'coop quality'... um...???? THIS ISN'T COOP QUALITY, I said. This isn't a coop. It will KILL my chickens, I said. "I just wish our expectations could meet up."

This isnt even coop builder speaking, just D (the worker's) girlfriend. The other one who does even less than coop builder.

Chore list. Now. This is just... naughty words. >
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PS I'm going to cry I think.
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PS2: As I was showing her how crap it was (and she ddn't understand why 'the door isn't even square' means crap) I actually CUT MYSELF on the coop. Huuuuge cuts all up my arm now.
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I was an unwilling house-guest courtesy of a flood about 5 years ago, so I can speak from your guests' position:

Regardless of the situation, NOTHING excuses people from being poor guests. Or poor craftsmen.

For what it's worth, I absolutely understood each time someone I was staying with (there were three different households we stayed with until we managed to get an apartment) criticized some aspect of our lack of courtesy or housekeeping. Not only was it hard for us, it's hard for households to stretch to accommodate additional people long term, and I was willing to do whatever I could to make things easier for them (once I got over the shock and quit watching the darn flood on TV).

Buck up and tell the dude that the Apartment Inspectors are going to flip over his creation since it doesn't match the approved plans. He may feel ... bad? But if he's got the opportunity to redeem himself by rebuilding it properly, maybe that'll help?

I also have experience telling contractors/builders/masons/framers/plumbers (I'm a short, curvy girl with a long blonde ponytail) they've built something wrong and they're going to have to tear it all out and re-build it at their expense, as it doesn't match the contract documents (ie, plans) which CLEARLY show the detail in question. It was difficult for me to do in the beginning, but I got over it. It does help when someone they respect (ie, man-boss) backs you up when they call him up to whine.
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Thank you! This really eases my heart a lot about my guilty conscious. I just didn't want to make life harder on them than it already is, y'know? But this isn't going to work, at all. And it sucks, but I have to be firm - this stuff just doesn't work for me.
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Someone has spoken to him. I've said plainly and clearly what needs to be done and my husband is coming home tonight (and guess what? my work cancelled!) and we're going to start tearing it down tonight - and then we're going to reuild over the weekend with him watching and show him what a good hard day's work is.

PS, I found out his age: he is 25.
 
I would not beat yourself up over this, this guy is 25 years old it is about time for some tough love anyways. You have went above and beyond in my estimation and if this guy has not figured out life to some degree then he may never figure it out sad but a fact not everyone has it, not trying to be mean here just stating a fact.
Quote:
Thank you! This really eases my heart a lot about my guilty conscious. I just didn't want to make life harder on them than it already is, y'know? But this isn't going to work, at all. And it sucks, but I have to be firm - this stuff just doesn't work for me.
sad.png


Someone has spoken to him. I've said plainly and clearly what needs to be done and my husband is coming home tonight (and guess what? my work cancelled!) and we're going to start tearing it down tonight - and then we're going to reuild over the weekend with him watching and show him what a good hard day's work is.

PS, I found out his age: he is 25.
 

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