Terrible Twos?

[SarahFair]

Oh goodness! My son is almost 2 and is just getting terribly out of control!

It has gotten to the point where I can not hardly go in anywhere. My SO and I cant go out to eat because he wont sit in his highchair, constantly fights with us, screams, cries, slings himself all over..
Trying to put him in the car seat he always arches his back and screams cries hits fights..
If his food isnt exactly what he wants he throws a fit or if you dont get him milk (after the first 2 cups) he throws himself all over me screaming and hitting.
If I tell him no its kicking hitting screaming crying.
Crying and Screaming is almost his WHOLE day.


Timeouts just dont seem to be working.
I tried popping him but that just seems to make him think that its ok to hit. For me to sit there and hold him

I dont know where to go with this. My other son was NEVER like this. He is very well behaved.


I dont know if this is just a stage or some kind of under lying problem if its something Im doing wrong...

I dont know how to fix it.
Any Suggestions for me?

 

[Mrs. Turbo]

welcome....the terrible twos last until they are 4-5 years old.....

I have a 3 and a 4 year old stuck in the 2 stage.

 

[rainplace]

I don't know how long this has been going on, but my oldest did something similar. I was able to put a stop to it pretty quick by making his time out a chair facing the wall. If he wouldn't sit there, or screamed and cried while there, I sat on him till he got himself under control. Once he was under control, timeout was for two minutes.

 

[sparkles2307]

Um, have fun? I vaguely remember the twos...and my youngest is only 4 now, so I guess that means its not as bad as it seems in the moment. Kind of like childbirth. I dont remember that being so bad either. Supposedly they shouldnt hear "no" but just be re-directed. I'm no tree-huggin hippy so my kids have heard NO since day one. I ignore them when they have tantrums, they figure out that they arent getting a response and quit.

 

[rainplace]

oh yeah, and the other thing, never threaten punishment as in, "If you do that one more time, I'm going to..." Punishment needs to be prompt, even when it's inconvenient to you.

eta: the word punishment sounds so harsh...

 

[Hoosiermomma]

Have you ever watched Super Nanny? If not you need to. She has great tips and practical solutions for misbehavior.

 

[Judy]

Quote:
Yup. The store/restaurant problem is harder. Mine hated the kiddie chairs in restaurants, too, but did OK if allowed to sit in a regular chair. He also did better in the big part of the grocery buggy than in those little seats made for them.

 

[Katy]

Although it's hard to do sometimes totally ignoring the temper tantrum always worked best for me with my own kids and now works with the grandkids ( two 2 years olds) that I babysit on a regular basis. At the first sign of a hissy fit turn around and walk out of the room or their sight. Usually if they don't have anyone to perform for it's no fun anymore. I really never had any trouble with them doing it in public because they found out at home it wasn't going to get them the results they wanted. One of them has fits for her folks in the store because she doesn't want to ride in the cart. She found out the first time she tried it with Grandma it was going to get her nowhere unlike with mom & dad who cave in to her crying. They think I'm lying when I tell them she doesn't do that with me!!

 

[SarahFair]

Here at home time outs work. Ill say 'TIME OUT ASHTON WE DO NOT HIT'. Hell run and sit on his bed.
Its when we go out and Im in the middle of Walmart with my buggy full Im close to being done shopping he starts throwing these huge fits or wanting to stand up and get out even after I resit him x10. When I snap the belt he screams and screams and screams and just sucks in and fights it off while Im turned looking at shampoo. Then I hear all the comments on here and other places that they are sick of peoples kids screaming in walmart. Times I have held his legs through the buggy till he stopped trying to get out. Should I just pick him up and take him out to my car and leave my milk meats and other frozen foods sitting in a full buggy in the middle of the store?

How do you teach your kids in public?!?

 

[Hen_House_Rocks!]

I feel for you. My two girls started the "terrible two's" at age one and didn't get over it until around the age of four. We had a 5 year period where we didn't go anywhere with them except daycare, preschool, and different parks and things where it was okay for them to be loud and boisterous.

The best advice I can give is to avoid situations that seem to be triggers. For us it was sit-down restaurants. Instead we would get take out and go eat at the park. The kids would play while my husband and I ate and enjoyed each other's company. WHen the girls wore themselves out, they would come eat.

Time out didn't work for us at first either. Then we started using their beds as the time out spot. They were allowed to sit with one toy or a book and have a little alone time. Then when they were able to calm down and behave, they could get up and join the rest of the family. This method worked wonders for us.