Or FW, future wife
The NFC B-Day Chat Thread
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Hey Kelsey please do not take this the wrong way as it is not a criticism, just food for thought.
Think about it carefully before taking on a parrot or similar which is likely to bond with you and you only. You are young and who knows what your plans may be in the future. As you say, with the larger birds, you could be making a 50 year or more commitment.
I read a lot about how you do not have time sometimes to do the things you want to with Gator and your fish are not as clean as you would like, along with the chickens sometimes. Adding more is just going to put you under more pressure and sometimes if we are under more pressure with so many daunting tasks ahead of us, we just give up completely and do none of them.
Also, you go away a little bit now, adding more pets is just going to make it more difficult to find someone to take care of them, especially if those pets are the type which can sometimes bond to one person.
I know that I would not want to be trying to take care of an angry or feeling deserted parrot.
Reading your post, you do not want more than one because you want them to bond with you but you also want more than one because you do not want them to get lonely; that kinda reads like you want them around when you have time for them but they need to keep themselves amused when you do not.
Sorry if that sounds harsh.
If you want to work with or interact with the larger birds and have the free time that they require, you could think about volunteering at a bird sanctuary etc where those birds will not be totally reliant on you and you alone.
Also, it would be great experience and practice to see if you do want to keep one and you will experience first hand the care and attention they require.
Think about it carefully before taking on a parrot or similar which is likely to bond with you and you only. You are young and who knows what your plans may be in the future. As you say, with the larger birds, you could be making a 50 year or more commitment.
I read a lot about how you do not have time sometimes to do the things you want to with Gator and your fish are not as clean as you would like, along with the chickens sometimes. Adding more is just going to put you under more pressure and sometimes if we are under more pressure with so many daunting tasks ahead of us, we just give up completely and do none of them.
Also, you go away a little bit now, adding more pets is just going to make it more difficult to find someone to take care of them, especially if those pets are the type which can sometimes bond to one person.
I know that I would not want to be trying to take care of an angry or feeling deserted parrot.
Reading your post, you do not want more than one because you want them to bond with you but you also want more than one because you do not want them to get lonely; that kinda reads like you want them around when you have time for them but they need to keep themselves amused when you do not.
Sorry if that sounds harsh.
If you want to work with or interact with the larger birds and have the free time that they require, you could think about volunteering at a bird sanctuary etc where those birds will not be totally reliant on you and you alone.
Also, it would be great experience and practice to see if you do want to keep one and you will experience first hand the care and attention they require.
I've been watching bird videos and now I really want a bird. But birds are way too loud and messy. But I've been watching some people with macaws and they are absolutely gorgeous.
And most of them leave the wings unclipped and do flight training so like for instance, one I've been watching is bonding with the bird and building her confidence and getting her to fly to them like from across the room or a perch a short distance away or whatever. And let me say, they look gorgeous flying. And I've seen big aviaries and huge cages, both indoor and outdoor, and ones that don't even go in the cage, just hang out all day. And birds that free fly off cliffs and stuff. And I would love to have that bond and have a bird to fly to me and stuff like that. But macaws are BIG and very expensive (both initial cost at upkeep), very loud, and very messy, and need a lot of work, attention, and interaction, and time so I probably won't get one. But maybe eventually. But I would like a smaller parrot, maybe an African Grey or conure. But greys are very very good imitators and talkers and can be irritating lol and intelligent so need stuff to do. And conures are very loud and messy. Although from what I understand green cheeks are little bit quieter and pretty cuddly??
I'll probably just end up getting a cockatiel or budgies or parakeets (similar but one's American and skinnier, smaller, and flightier, kinda wanna go to a breeder and get a real English budgie and/or handraised) but cockatiels don't really talk I don't think? And budgies would probably get eaten here lol so probably can't free fly. But I do like the whistling of cockatiels and they can learn cool tunes. And parakeets and budgies are small and cute and pretty cheerful and can learn lots of tricks. But they also chirp and whistle and make bird noises all the time. So I kind of would almost rather have a conure or macaw or something that doesn't scream or be loud a lot but is just loud volume wise. But idk. But the bigger birds are like having a perpetual two year old for 50 years. But they're a lot more cuddly being bigger. More to hold and cuddle lol
But budgies are adorable.
My other thought is having like 4 or more in a large flight cage or outdoor aviary 24/7 or in summer. But the problem with that is they say that if you have more than one then they tend to bond more with each other than with you. But I think it is selfish to only have one and also to keep it in a tiny cage. So I do plan to have at least 2 and a bigger cage. But a group of 4 is so fun to watch interact with each other and play and such. But it's also louder. And might be harder to train, if at all possible. So idk. 4 kind of seems, I think, it's more to just watch and observe and be pretty. Whereas one or two I might be able to train to do tricks. With bigger, possibly more intelligent or complex birds, having one isn't that big of a deal because they can bond really closely with you, their flock, but imo, budgies are much more flock birds. I mean, they fly around Australia in huge flocks. So it seems cruel to me to only have one. But it can be done. But only one bird is also more work cause with a pair or group, they keep each other company.
I would like to eventually get a big aviary though and have like 6 or 8 or even 10 haha but we'll see.
But either way, whether I get 2 or get 4 or more, I think I will get one bird at a time and/or keep the new one separate for a while first so that they bond with me first and then the other birds so that way I can still teach them things or catch them if I need to, etc. Or I might get two at a time so they don't forget how to be a bird.
And if I got a cockatiel, I would get at least a pair.
But birds are a lot of work and I also want gerbils, for which I already have all the stuff, and a bigger fish tank or a pond, plus quail, so this would be a long way off. But I do eventually want to do it. I have a perfect spot in mind. Or if that doesn't work, a second idea.
I just need to know whether they can stay outside year-round or if I would have to bring them inside? Which could easily be done. But it'd be nice for them to have the wing room.
But some say oh you'll kill them if you have them outside full time or colder than 65 degrees F but then on this New England group I'm on, some people do have them outside and someone just recently, like a few months ago, built an outdoor aviary for parakeets and cockatiels. And someone else has finches, which are a lot smaller, out yearround. So I think it can be done, despite what people say. You just have to acclimate them properly and I think have a windproof box/shelter to go in or wall one side or something in winter. But I'm just not entirely sure how to do any of that. And wouldn't want to kill any of them.
But it's also somewhat a lot of work with proper diet and everything but I guess it's not that much work, not anymore than what I should be eating for myself lol, fresh fruits and veggies and sometimes sprouts
You have to think about what you want out of life such as a family and travel. I'd never have a large parrot around children. They just can't read the birds body language (heck, most adults can't) and those beaks do some serious damage. A friend of ours leaned down to kiss her daughter goodnight with their rainbow lorikeet on her shoulder. The lorikeet bit right by her daughter's eye badly. And who would look after your bird if you wanted to go on holiday?
We ended up with a sulphur crested cockatoo that hadn't been brought up right. He was my Mum's cousin's - she suffered from manic depression and ended up committing suicide. She left him to us.
We rehomed him before our daughter was born as he was just so loud and difficult, and we had no idea what we were doing.I know conjures are projectile poopers which put me off them. Ringnecks I thought were lovely, quiet birds until we were at the petshop during their active time!
Cockatiels are messy with their food and dusty, but cuddly and fun without being demanding, and if you have two they amuse each other and are less reliant on you for lots of attention. They love a good head scratch and females are more cuddly (generally). The boys have to show off and be silly, then when they are tired they get cuddly. They will love everyone who spends time with them whereas most other parrots bond strongly with one person which can make relationships difficult.
I actually love our coturnix quail more and more. The ones we hatched a little while ago are so friendly and sweet and nosy, and the Buttons that have grown up with them are much calmer (though they still don't want us touching them). I'm thrilled out of 10 birds I only ended up with 2 boys. We have some friends wanting a group so they can have a boy and four girls. They really are sweet pets (which is why I'm not sure I could ever eat them - maybe if I was hatching them out in large numbers... maybe).
Jae are quail kept contained in a run or cages, or allowed to free range? I really don't know anything about them.
When we first moved out here 48 years ago, we had deer go through the yard and pheasants - really neat. One day I saw different birds and couldn't figure out what they were till I heard "bobwhite,bobwhite." then I got all excited . That was the first & last time I ever saw them.But what a thrill.
When we first moved out here 48 years ago, we had deer go through the yard and pheasants - really neat. One day I saw different birds and couldn't figure out what they were till I heard "bobwhite,bobwhite." then I got all excited . That was the first & last time I ever saw them.But what a thrill.
All excellent suggestions! Thanks!
Although fiancé isn't that long to type, I was more meaning the whole thing I always type of "my brother and his girlfriend", now "my brother and his fiancé", it's just so long to type all that every single time haha sorry, wasn't very clear. That's a lot to type but I don't really want to put their names. Idk.
Tbh I hadn't really thought of what the bird would do if/when I eventually get a BF or husband and/or have kids or move or anything like that. It'd probably be hard on an intelligent bird? Hadn't really thought of travel and trouble finding a pet sitter either.
And you do somewhat have a point about the tasks/pressure thing. I think I've done the giving up bit with school...
Or close, not yet. Still trying, or want to try, but don't actually do much work, namely the reading cause I do the other stuff, then getting stressed about it
But I have actually done that in the past. It's why I dropped out of my last school.
But I was really depressed and struggling then.
But I had missed a few assignments and instead of doing them and handing them in late, I just wouldn't do them. Or I would but then I'd be embarrassed or think it was "way too late" to hand it in even if I HAD done it... which was stupid. But then eventually it turned into just not doing ANYTHING anymore as the late assignments built up. Even more stupid. Missed a few classes too.
Eventually I had to drop out. I was originally only going to drop out of one math class or two and try to finish the other two (at the time i think it was a trimester and 3 classes at a time right after I left it switched to a semester schedule but it might have been right before I left and I took 4 which could've been why I had a harder time that year) but then there were only two weeks left in the semester and they said there was no way I was going to be able to make everything up in that time, the one lady was really nice and tried to be helpful but there was just no way, so then I dropped out completely.
My parents were pretty upset too because I was in this special program they paid extra for that was supposed to help me do well in school and check up on me and stuff and I got copies of notes cause I was a slow writer and extra time and that sort of thing. I was on an IEP in high school. I don't have that at this one though cause it's a lot easier and chill haha and a community college.
But anyway, they were supposed to help kids succeed.
But I wasn't mad at them or blamed them because I also stopped answering their calls and going to the meetings....
How can they help if I don't even talk to them.
But I guess they thought they could have tried harder or gone to my dorm or something? But they had a separate service you paid even more for where you lived in a specific area, I think it was like an Aspergers or Autism program or something, so obviously if we didn't pay for that they're probably not going to go knock on doors. And they're busy.
Entirely my fault.
But anyway, my dad especially was also somewhat pissed because they sorta thought I was just being lazy. That I'm so smart and could've/should've passed. And I should've so maybe he's right, idk.
We didn't put medical on the form though, just academic.
I really should have taken advantage of the free therapy on campus haha
Thought about it but didn't. Kept getting scared or thinking I didn't need it.
ANYWAY.
Sorry for the complete detour change of subject way too personal and awkward tangent......
Back to birds....
All that said, I know that I do not have the time now so I wouldn't get the bird now. It probably wouldn't be for a few years at least if I did. Right now I'm mostly just admiring how pretty they are.
I do think though, despite being right about some things, the bit about wanting multiple birds and my reasons for it I think was misinterpreted or maybe I wasn't very clear. Yes, I do want them to bond with me, but if they don't, that's okay too, and I don't want a friend for them for my own benefit or because I want them to entertain themselves when I don't feel like it or anything like that. I really do want the friend only for their benefit. I think it's kind of almost cruel in a way to keep a flock animal alone. But that said, if I got a large parrot like a macaw or a conure or a grey then I probably wouldn't get it a friend and would just spend a ton of time working with and hanging out with the animal. The multiple bird thing was only for a smaller bird like a cockatiel or parakeets and only because I feel that parakeets especially are flock birds and would be miserable alone. Maybe handraised ones from a breeder wouldn't be? Idk. But I would still want a friend for them. But trust me, the friend is solely for their benefit and I really am only looking out for the animal's health and wellbeing and not because I want to just stuff it in a cage when I want to go somewhere and not have to play with it. Not that I would stuff it in a cage anyways. I wouldn't get a bird, especially the larger parrots, unless I had the time for one, which I don't right now, and I wouldn't be getting a friend for the larger ones, so it's definitely not cause I don't want to devote time to it. Cause one would be more work.
But that said, if I did build an aviary or buy a large flight cage and get like 4 then yeah, in that case they probably would entertain themselves, and I probably could do things but in that case, I would mostly just have them for the looks and aesthetics and pretty sounds and not really the strong bond anyways. And if I did bond with them it would mostly just be so I can check on their health, like have them step up or fly to me or something.
If I only had 2 I'd do more tricks and stuff.
But with a large parrot, I would probably never be able to do anything again, even concerts, which is why I wouldn't get one for a while or ever haha
But parakeets or cockatiels maybe, eventually, idk.
But volunteering at a bird rescue is a good idea and something I hadn't thought of. I might try that.
You have to think about what you want out of life such as a family and travel. I'd never have a large parrot around children. They just can't read the birds body language (heck, most adults can't) and those beaks do some serious damage. A friend of ours leaned down to kiss her daughter goodnight with their rainbow lorikeet on her shoulder. The lorikeet bit right by her daughter's eye badly. And who would look after your bird if you wanted to go on holiday?
We ended up with a sulphur crested cockatoo that hadn't been brought up right. He was my Mum's cousin's - she suffered from manic depression and ended up committing suicide. She left him to us.
I know conjures are projectile poopers which put me off them. Ringnecks I thought were lovely, quiet birds until we were at the petshop during their active time!
Cockatiels are messy with their food and dusty, but cuddly and fun without being demanding, and if you have two they amuse each other and are less reliant on you for lots of attention. They love a good head scratch and females are more cuddly (generally). The boys have to show off and be silly, then when they are tired they get cuddly. They will love everyone who spends time with them whereas most other parrots bond strongly with one person which can make relationships difficult.
I actually love our coturnix quail more and more. The ones we hatched a little while ago are so friendly and sweet and nosy, and the Buttons that have grown up with them are much calmer (though they still don't want us touching them). I'm thrilled out of 10 birds I only ended up with 2 boys. We have some friends wanting a group so they can have a boy and four girls. They really are sweet pets (which is why I'm not sure I could ever eat them - maybe if I was hatching them out in large numbers... maybe).
Thanks, I never thought of most of that stuff!! Good point. Glad the girl was okay. This one person, a pretty well known bird trainer, does have a husband and young daughter and they have a bunch of macaws (their own and client birds boarding), a grey, a toucan, some smaller parrots, etc. So I suppose it is possible but I also know that is really rare and being professionals, they obviously know the warning signs of the birds more than the average person would and probably taught their daughter and friends bird safety plus socialized the birds so I don't think the average person, myself included, should do it. Cause those beaks are BIG and STRONG and could probably take a finger off.
Cockatiels seem like the perfect birds - bigger than a parakeet and more cuddly but not as loud or as much work as the larger parrots.
But would I be allergic to the dust? I heard that cockatiels and I think maybe greys have like a powdery substance on their feathers that the others don't have? Like a finer dander or something?
Quail seem great too! I don't know haha
That's awesome!! I would love to have more deer and wildlife here. Though we do get deer, turkeys, fox (my mom just ran into one the other day, literally almost lol), coyotes, rabbits, squirrels, raccoons, skunks, birds of prey (hawks, falcons, and owls, mostly red tail and coopers hawks and great horned owls with the occasional perregine), and various pretty song birds. So I guess we do get quite a bit of wildlife. But haven't seen the deer in a while.
But anyway, from what I gather, I think they are caged and can't free range like chickens as they apparently wouldn't come back. Most people I've seen keep them in elevated cages like rabbit hutches and a lot say you can't or shouldn't put them on the ground but I think if I ever get some I might put them on the grouns anyway but in a super secure run with secure bottom. I've seen people do it. But yeah.
And sorry if my post seemed at all snappy, defensive, rude or anything like that. Wasn't trying to be at all but tone doesn't come across well on the internet.
Plus feeling kinda weird physically atm
Plus feeling kinda weird physically atm
B&F .. brother and fiance 
All excellent suggestions! Thanks!
Although fiancé isn't that long to type, I was more meaning the whole thing I always type of "my brother and his girlfriend", now "my brother and his fiancé", it's just so long to type all that every single time haha sorry, wasn't very clear. That's a lot to type but I don't really want to put their names. Idk.
Tbh I hadn't really thought of what the bird would do if/when I eventually get a BF or husband and/or have kids or move or anything like that. It'd probably be hard on an intelligent bird? Hadn't really thought of travel and trouble finding a pet sitter either.
And you do somewhat have a point about the tasks/pressure thing. I think I've done the giving up bit with school...
Or close, not yet. Still trying, or want to try, but don't actually do much work, namely the reading cause I do the other stuff, then getting stressed about it
But I have actually done that in the past. It's why I dropped out of my last school.
But I was really depressed and struggling then.
But I had missed a few assignments and instead of doing them and handing them in late, I just wouldn't do them. Or I would but then I'd be embarrassed or think it was "way too late" to hand it in even if I HAD done it... which was stupid. But then eventually it turned into just not doing ANYTHING anymore as the late assignments built up. Even more stupid. Missed a few classes too.
Eventually I had to drop out. I was originally only going to drop out of one math class or two and try to finish the other two (at the time i think it was a trimester and 3 classes at a time right after I left it switched to a semester schedule but it might have been right before I left and I took 4 which could've been why I had a harder time that year) but then there were only two weeks left in the semester and they said there was no way I was going to be able to make everything up in that time, the one lady was really nice and tried to be helpful but there was just no way, so then I dropped out completely.
My parents were pretty upset too because I was in this special program they paid extra for that was supposed to help me do well in school and check up on me and stuff and I got copies of notes cause I was a slow writer and extra time and that sort of thing. I was on an IEP in high school. I don't have that at this one though cause it's a lot easier and chill haha and a community college.
But anyway, they were supposed to help kids succeed.
But I wasn't mad at them or blamed them because I also stopped answering their calls and going to the meetings....
How can they help if I don't even talk to them.
But I guess they thought they could have tried harder or gone to my dorm or something? But they had a separate service you paid even more for where you lived in a specific area, I think it was like an Aspergers or Autism program or something, so obviously if we didn't pay for that they're probably not going to go knock on doors. And they're busy.
Entirely my fault.
But anyway, my dad especially was also somewhat pissed because they sorta thought I was just being lazy. That I'm so smart and could've/should've passed. And I should've so maybe he's right, idk.
We didn't put medical on the form though, just academic.
I really should have taken advantage of the free therapy on campus haha
Thought about it but didn't. Kept getting scared or thinking I didn't need it.
ANYWAY.
Sorry for the complete detour change of subject way too personal and awkward tangent......
Back to birds....
All that said, I know that I do not have the time now so I wouldn't get the bird now. It probably wouldn't be for a few years at least if I did. Right now I'm mostly just admiring how pretty they are.
I do think though, despite being right about some things, the bit about wanting multiple birds and my reasons for it I think was misinterpreted or maybe I wasn't very clear. Yes, I do want them to bond with me, but if they don't, that's okay too, and I don't want a friend for them for my own benefit or because I want them to entertain themselves when I don't feel like it or anything like that. I really do want the friend only for their benefit. I think it's kind of almost cruel in a way to keep a flock animal alone. But that said, if I got a large parrot like a macaw or a conure or a grey then I probably wouldn't get it a friend and would just spend a ton of time working with and hanging out with the animal. The multiple bird thing was only for a smaller bird like a cockatiel or parakeets and only because I feel that parakeets especially are flock birds and would be miserable alone. Maybe handraised ones from a breeder wouldn't be? Idk. But I would still want a friend for them. But trust me, the friend is solely for their benefit and I really am only looking out for the animal's health and wellbeing and not because I want to just stuff it in a cage when I want to go somewhere and not have to play with it. Not that I would stuff it in a cage anyways. I wouldn't get a bird, especially the larger parrots, unless I had the time for one, which I don't right now, and I wouldn't be getting a friend for the larger ones, so it's definitely not cause I don't want to devote time to it. Cause one would be more work.
But that said, if I did build an aviary or buy a large flight cage and get like 4 then yeah, in that case they probably would entertain themselves, and I probably could do things but in that case, I would mostly just have them for the looks and aesthetics and pretty sounds and not really the strong bond anyways. And if I did bond with them it would mostly just be so I can check on their health, like have them step up or fly to me or something.
If I only had 2 I'd do more tricks and stuff.
But with a large parrot, I would probably never be able to do anything again, even concerts, which is why I wouldn't get one for a while or ever haha
But parakeets or cockatiels maybe, eventually, idk.
But volunteering at a bird rescue is a good idea and something I hadn't thought of. I might try that.
Thanks, I never thought of most of that stuff!! Good point. Glad the girl was okay. This one person, a pretty well known bird trainer, does have a husband and young daughter and they have a bunch of macaws (their own and client birds boarding), a grey, a toucan, some smaller parrots, etc. So I suppose it is possible but I also know that is really rare and being professionals, they obviously know the warning signs of the birds more than the average person would and probably taught their daughter and friends bird safety plus socialized the birds so I don't think the average person, myself included, should do it. Cause those beaks are BIG and STRONG and could probably take a finger off.
Cockatiels seem like the perfect birds - bigger than a parakeet and more cuddly but not as loud or as much work as the larger parrots.
But would I be allergic to the dust? I heard that cockatiels and I think maybe greys have like a powdery substance on their feathers that the others don't have? Like a finer dander or something?
Quail seem great too! I don't know haha
I know Macaws can't be kept with cockatiels and possibly African Greys due to the dander so it may be a trigger for you. Quail are dusty little things too but outside that's not a problem. My bourkes are probably the least dusty birds and they can be sweet hand reared pets but they don't like to be touched. They are neat freaks compared to our cockatiels although we have a young male who likes to wash his hulled oats before eating them, so he drops the shell in the water, which makes the water go gross.
Quail do need to be contained as they don't have a homing instinct like chickens do. I've had one escape and it did finally come back to find it's friends. I love the bobwhite call. Bobwhites need to be kept as pairs during the breeding season and need a bigger cage I believe. I love pheasants too! I've once had a covey of the Californian Valley quail come through our backyard. They are so cute. There are small wild populations here and you can keep them in captivity, or raise them to release.
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