The Old Folks Home

[7 Biddies]

Why offer him something that has no chance of succeeding and take away the hospice care that my mom needed?

Oooops. I goofed. See next post.

 

[7 Biddies]

Why offer him something that has no chance of succeeding and take away the hospice care that my mom needed?

In all honesty, because the drugs are still in the "trial" phase, the only patients they CAN try it on are the ones who are too far gone to really help. But, they look to see if it has any positive or negative effects at all. They then use these results to help determine if it's okay to try the drug on people who aren't as severe, as a possible cure. My brother consented to a clinical trial for his lung cancer through Sloan-Kettering. It helped for a very short time before he finally succumbed. But, thanks to him and others like him, it's now being widely used to cure people in the earlier stages of his type of lung cancer. It's the closest they can come to actual "human guinea pigs".

 

[dsqard]

7 Biddies, I am not against the process, just against it in this particular case. It was obvious that my dad did not have long to live and they needed hospice care more than participating in a trial. Like I said, he didn't even get the first treatment. I understand that they have to start with terminal patients, but if you are trying to treat someone so close to dying then how are you going to know if the drug is working? Even if he had lived another week and had made it through the first treatment, there is no way anything would have extended his life at that point. He really was that close. I am not a doctor and I knew that. You only had to look at him to know that. It made me angry that his doctor didn't consider the reprecussions of offering this "life saver" to him. She put no thought into how my mom was going to help him get to the bathroom or to the car to get to appointments. She wears a leg brace and uses canes to walk.

 

[ronott1]

7 Biddies, I am not against the process, just against it in this particular case. It was obvious that my dad did not have long to live and they needed hospice care more than participating in a trial. Like I said, he didn't even get the first treatment. I understand that they have to start with terminal patients, but if you are trying to treat someone so close to dying then how are you going to know if the drug is working? Even if he had lived another week and had made it through the first treatment, there is no way anything would have extended his life at that point. He really was that close. I am not a doctor and I knew that. You only had to look at him to know that. It made me angry that his doctor didn't consider the reprecussions of offering this "life saver" to him. She put no thought into how my mom was going to help him get to the bathroom or to the car to get to appointments. She wears a leg brace and uses canes to walk.

My father died of MS complications so I understand what you were going through.

The least they could have done would be to pay for him to stay an a care facility or hospital. Here at UCD we have a Primate Center where they do drug research. Somehow that is protested as cruel...

 

[dsqard]

ronott, he died where he wanted to die, at home. They made it through that week OK it just would have been a little better if my mom could have had help. He didn't want to die in the hospital. In fact he ran a fever over 101 for most of a month and refused to go to the hospital. I asked him why he wouldn't go to the hospital one day and he said "because people die in hospitals." I am a firm believer that people have the right to die with dignity and to chose the where if they can (not talking about suicide here, just end of life choices). In the end, he was home and he was relatively pain free. Other than that, I guess you can't ask for too much more when the time comes. Just wish he could still be here. He was relatively young (only 64) and I miss talking to him from time to time. We used to talk about once a week. He was a computer geek to the extreme, and half the time I didn't understand what he was talking about but I wasn't close to him when I was growing up so having that connection as adults was precious to me.

 

[ronott1]

ronott, he died where he wanted to die, at home. They made it through that week OK it just would have been a little better if my mom could have had help. He didn't want to die in the hospital. In fact he ran a fever over 101 for most of a month and refused to go to the hospital. I asked him why he wouldn't go to the hospital one day and he said "because people die in hospitals." I am a firm believer that people have the right to die with dignity and to chose the where if they can (not talking about suicide here, just end of life choices). In the end, he was home and he was relatively pain free. Other than that, I guess you can't ask for too much more when the time comes. Just wish he could still be here. He was relatively young (only 64) and I miss talking to him from time to time. We used to talk about once a week. He was a computer geek to the extreme, and half the time I didn't understand what he was talking about but I wasn't close to him when I was growing up so having that connection as adults was precious to me.

Keep your spirits up over the Holidays! I know this is a hard time and we really miss our loved ones(and pets) now more than ever.

I will spend plenty of time with my chickens. They make me very happy!

 

[dsqard]

Keep your spirits up over the Holidays! I know this is a hard time and we really miss our loved ones(and pets) now more than ever.

I will spend plenty of time with my chickens. They make me very happy!

Very kind words and thank you.

I do keep my spirits up most of the time. Have lots of things to be thankful for and I try to remember that every day. It has been years since he passed so it is not as hard as it used to be. BTW, my chickens, turkeys, dogs and horses are great thearapy too! Nothing like seeing a fat tom running for the pen at treat time to make you laugh!

 

[Cynthia12]

Cynthia, my heart goes out to you. That is tragic. I had a German Shepard who got a rare agressive cancer. We got his tumor lazered off and gave him some meds. He was like a puppy again for a month ot two then got worse then before. He was near 11 but he was heslthy as a horse. Well before the cancer. Had to take him to be put down...seeing the life go out of him was horrible...but to not expect the death and witness it? That must be far worse... I have a Dachshund... best dog I have ever had.he is my bestt friend... I often find myself having conversations and dressing him up. We snuggle and do almost everything together. I can't imagine him gone....with Doxies their little backe are prone to have inverted discs.. He is a little over a year old. We know a main cause for doxxie back probs are over weight weinies. So he is kept at a good weight. Try to minimize the jumping off of stuff but it is hard tostop him. I am hoping he is like my fiends dachshund and live problem free. But I fear he might have problems in the future... I want to get him treated, but I juet thinkbof the pain he will have to suffer, when sugery, recovery, and the chance of it happening again. Also the funds to pay fo his surgery. As I know it is expensive. I would like to think If I put him down after his back goes out so he doesnt have to suffer that. But often think How that would be bad ownership. ...also loowing him ould devestate me.

Thank you Country...I have a Dachshund too! He is a year this month. A pie bald in coloring. What a character. I know what you mean about trying to keep them from jumping from furniture, just not going to happen. I worry about the things that can go wrong too! I never thought I would want of these breeds, but my daughter has one, and I just love him. So, found myself getting one this year.
A couple of pictures. How about you? Pics?

This is Brody..his first snow! It's like he's thinking, what's this mom? That's our Shnoodle
back there..he's been around for a while and knows what it is.

This little Doxie has taken to me. I can't go anywhere without him right there. He's right
here beside me right now. Very protective of me. Doesn't want to share my lap..with Ziggy
the Shnoodle. Nope.

 

[Arielle]

Didi-- sorry you are reliving the loss and frustration with the doctors. I see doctors in a new light; many are self serving while others are truly benevolent. THe former have cawsed me to be a bit jaded about doctors and I no longer put any of them on a pedastel. Research is not pretty.


Cancer is a devistating disease. My mother still suffers from chemo brain-- a brilliant woman mentally slowed by the effects. I vowed to avoid cancer. If possible. I've had my high risk organs removed: detecting ovarian cancer in the early stages is nearly impossible. I decided to dump the tissues that grow the cancer; an interesting tidbit was that the cancer actually starts in the tubes.

I have lived my adult life knowing I will get ovarian and breast cancer; I am part of a new generation that is trying to prevent the onset of the disease. A new concept. I don't need chemo brain, I struggle as it is. I am using diet and lifestyle to keep the cancer from starting. Dana Farber has started a new research program, so I heard, to study diet as a prevention. WHile I'm glad they are doing the study, I think it is way over due.

ENd of life decisions are never stright forward. I feel for your mom , Didi, struggling iwth MS already. Anyone will reach for the last hurah, it is our will to survive, I think. THe doctor was being self serving and I've seen that manipulation before. Glad your dad passed at home. Hugs. I know it's been years. but the loss of a parent leaves it;s mark.

 

[7 Biddies]

7 Biddies, I am not against the process, just against it in this particular case. It was obvious that my dad did not have long to live and they needed hospice care more than participating in a trial. Like I said, he didn't even get the first treatment. I understand that they have to start with terminal patients, but if you are trying to treat someone so close to dying then how are you going to know if the drug is working? Even if he had lived another week and had made it through the first treatment, there is no way anything would have extended his life at that point. He really was that close. I am not a doctor and I knew that. You only had to look at him to know that. It made me angry that his doctor didn't consider the reprecussions of offering this "life saver" to him. She put no thought into how my mom was going to help him get to the bathroom or to the car to get to appointments. She wears a leg brace and uses canes to walk.

I don't advocate for the practice, except when the patient understands exactly what the purpose is. Unfortunately, most times, patients and their families don't. They somehow believe they still have a chance. I just wish the doctors were more honest and describe what they're doing as clearly as I did. I agree that he needed hospice more than any treatment (hospice is WONDERFUL - very compassionate with the focus on comfort) and hate to hear how he was treated. My only intent was to answer your question about WHY they try these new treatments in cases of terminal cancer.

It's a shame you weren't able to be there to help them negotiate this horrible time. He deserved to spend his last days in dignity and comfort.