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Things We Learn From Our Kids

Discussion in 'Games, Jokes, and Fun!' started by BettyR, Jan 27, 2009.

  1. BettyR

    BettyR Songster 10 Years

    Mar 1, 2008
    Texas Gulf Coast
    Things We Learn From Our Kids

    There is no such thing as child-proofing your house

    If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite

    A 4 years-old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant

    If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing pound puppy underwear and a superman cape

    It is strong enough however to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 by 20 foot room

    A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.

    The glass in windows (even double pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.

    When you hear the toilet flush and the words "Uh-oh;" it's already too late.

    Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

    A six year old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36 year old man says they can only do it in the movies.

    A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day.

    Your fire department in has at least a 5 minute response time.

    A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq foot house 4 inches deep.

    Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a four year old Duplos will not.

    No matter how much Jello you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.

    Pool filters do not like Jello.

    Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

    Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.

    Always look in the oven before you turn it on.

    The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earth worms dizzy. It will however make cats dizzy.

    Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

    You never want to hear, "Watch me fly!" coming from the roof.

    Under the bed is not a good place to save snowballs for summer.

    Bugs are not a dietary supplement.

    Walnuts make the blender act funny.

    Collecting things is good. Collecting things that come out of your nose is not.

    If you hear the words, "Guess what's in my mouth." You REALLY don't want to know!

    Most toilets can not consume an entire roll of toilet paper without choking.

    Hiding parts of daddy's computer can make your butt hurt.

    Fish can not use a remote control, even if placed in their tank.

    Setting the hamsters free changes the cat's mood.

    Cats do not like to be wrapped in duct tape.

    Cats get even.
  2. hippichick

    hippichick Songster

    Apr 13, 2008
    Branch, La
    Ok, are you speaking from experience. For your sake, I surely hope not![​IMG] If you are, you seriously deserve a vacation!! That is too funny.........

  3. When my son was 4, he decided to make a milk shake all by himself. In the process, he somehow or the other ground a hole in the side of the blender. [​IMG] . . . . . . I was completely unaware of this at the time

    So, my oldest daughter comes to the barn to tell me that he has super glued all his fingers together. [​IMG] No problem !

    (The neighbor friend had taken her son to the emergency room recently because his brothers glued his fingers together for him.)

    So, I knew to use nail polish remover to get them apart ![​IMG] We worked on his fingers, got them apart, all was well. I never thought to ask him how it happened [​IMG]

    It was at least a year later when I noticed something glued to the side of the blender ! [​IMG] Here I was thinking he glued his fingers together just to see if it would really work........[​IMG]

    He had ground a hole in the side of the blender, found a small piece of plastic, God only knows where ! and repaired the blender so I wouldn't find out ! [​IMG]

    And that was only ONE of the many things he did ![​IMG]
  4. BettyR

    BettyR Songster 10 Years

    Mar 1, 2008
    Texas Gulf Coast
    Quote:No...I had 3 girls and only one son...and I thank the Lord every day!!!

    My best friend however had 3 boys...she was the one who sent me this list. [​IMG]
  5. r0xiRox

    r0xiRox In the Brooder

    Jan 23, 2009
    i got told that my daughter wishes i am indian (i have no clue why) that we are part of the gumball family, and that if you poke a spider using a pin, it will die.
  6. Ec_Prokta

    Ec_Prokta Continuum Shift Anomaly

    Jan 14, 2009
    LOL! So true!
  7. serendipity22

    serendipity22 Songster

    Jul 1, 2007
    Cats ALWAYS get even!

    How True!

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