Things you wish you could say

Or. Put her on leash and give her a sharp tug and say NO! Hopefully they will feel awful when they see that she gets corrected for their bad behavior, and she'll learn not to accept goodies from anyone other than you. Also hopefully it won't take more than one or two corrections.
I like this though
 
It was summer and for reasons the crew got a day off work.

For reasons known only to yourself you chose not to tell your wife, instead you chose to pretend you still had work and instead left for the river to “hang out with the bros” which is where you took numerous pics of yourself and your bros at your fun nude beach party at the river and for even more unfathomable reasons then consciously shared them with your coworkers and your boss and then your boss’s boss.

You unknowingly picked up a fun new respiratory infection from your fun beach party with your bros that your wife didn’t know about.

A few days pass and you realize you’ve come down with something, you know you’re sick but again for reasons known only to yourself you decide to go back to work anyway, don’t tell anyone you’re sick, and you expose the crew.

A few days go by, everyone’s sick and you choose to admit that you’re probably the source because one of your bro’s was sick at your fun beach bro party that your wife isn’t supposed to know about.

Some of the crew are getting really sick, your boss is really sick, family members of the crew and boss are getting really sick. The hospital says it’s “community acquired pneumonia” specifically chlamydia pneumonia.

Most of the crew is out sick now, but you’ve gotten over it, most of the crew being out sick effectively shuts the job down which is financially bad for everyone but it really sucks just for you because you’re feeling better and you don’t think it’s fair that you're going to miss a paycheck because everyone else is sick and unable to work which shut the job down, so you get on your phone again and complain to your coworkers and your boss and your boss’s boss who you also sent those fun photos to of your fun beach bro party your wife isn’t supposed to know about.

Now your wife knows.



Your wife isn’t speaking to you now that she knows and that may be a good thing because HELL HATH NO FURY and you don’t understand who or why someone snitched to your wife about the fun bro beach party where you caught the Bro cold and then shared the Bro Cold with half the company and then were mad at the company for shutting down over the Bro Cold that you gave everyone.
Update: Mr. Bro Cold is now divorced….and much to my disappointment my source had no more tea to spill on the subject.
 
Or. Put her on leash and give her a sharp tug and say NO! Hopefully they will feel awful when they see that she gets corrected for their bad behavior, and she'll learn not to accept goodies from anyone other than you. Also hopefully it won't take more than one or two corrections.
The thing is, unless they call her and show her the food she lays quietly, I'd feel bad for correcting her just for getting up to get closer to family members calling her. I'd rather not have to punish my dog for humans not listening. Although this is a good idea. And I'd like Dawgs said they'd take issue with it
 

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