Those abominable bragging Christmas letters !

[The Chicken Lady]

I HATE those vile letters. Whatever happened to a simple, "I hope your family has a blessed Christmas" and fun cards with cardinals and stars on them?

Our family gets one from a (particularly snooty) aunt every year. It's just as you described. UGH.

Bragging Christmas letters...bah, humbug!

 

[Picky Chicky]

Oh man... I might need to rethink my strategy on Christmas cards this year. Yikes! We usually send the letters to family we haven't seen in forever...

Tough crowd! hehe

 

[mirime]

Quote:
I have many friends and acquaintances whom I don't talk to that often...life is busy, and people move across the country or internationally (I used to work at a college; staff and students leave every four years or so) So I appreciate well-thought-out letters, even if they are xeroxed. Now I don't receive a lot, but the ones I do, they're well done and there has always been a little extra personalized note attached. I appreciate them.

Just my two-cents.

 

[ChickaD]

Buff, this is really good stuff!

I think Christmas Snoozeletters have to be very carefully done so they're down-to-earth (rather than finger down-the-throat!

)! Years ago my daughter used to screen the snoozeletters that would arrive from old "friends" and decide whether or not I should read them, or if they would just depress me with "bragitis".

I also think they should avoid sounding like a medical thesis...IMHO.

 

[Fudgie]

I want one that reads like this.........

Hi everyone, Since I have not spoken to you all for like years, I want you to know what we are up to our eyeballs in.

Well here is life at the JMajors household.
Ticked at the hubby right now because he won't let the girls keep the pygmy goats they bought for 7 bucks each, they are crying profusely and I wanna take a 2X4 to his head. Can't get him off his butt to build a bigger pen for the peacocks that is varmint proof. Danged chicken and duck waterer is leaking and cannot/will not figure out why. Danged raccoons are tormenting the chickens and ducks. OH some good news, we did sell some of the Extra chickeys.

The girls .... well, 4-H is their life. This year we gotta buy a new cow and bull for the show season and figure out how to pull some money out of a buttcheek to pay for that grain bill, and goats and pigs and chickens oh yeah and don't forget the 5 dogs and 2 cats. All 5 of the dogs were in the house the other day while I was trying to do laundry. Had the towels folded 4 times and yes had to refold them again because of the rucus of them running rampant throughout the house growling and wrestling.

Got baby chicks on the way. Going to have a baby shower for Bertha. 41 of the little critters are on the way and we need, paper towels, bedding, a new heat lamp and another brooder would be nice. Anyone want to donate to the little girls and boys, they are registered at Orscheln's farm and home?

We have purchased some incubators over the last year and are ready to mass incubate next spring. Got all my connections for eggs and such and just waiting for February!

Tax bill came in and therefore we will not be purchasing any worthless Christmas gifts that you all don't give a dang about anyway. I won't have to spend gas money getting them and you won't have to spend it taking them back to the store. You just have to put up with my smiling face at Christmas time and like spend time TALKING to me instead of wasting 7 hours opening up each present and taking pictures of each danged one! How's that grab ya!

See ya at Christmas at mommies! Love the Jmajors

 

[Rosalind]

I'm always tempted to write about my many failures. They're so much more amusing and educational. Like the time I penned the dog in the swimming pool area, and then went skinny dipping. The dog, knowing exactly which part of the fence was weak, busted through the pickets and ran into the neighbor's yard, then refused to come when called, running joyfully through the neighborhood. I had to streak down the road to catch him, with only a flapping towel for modesty.

There's also the time my mother found my, uh, marital aides, the Great Soup Explosions of '99, '00, '01, '02 and so forth, and the time DH walled up the chipmunk nest under the floor without ensuring that it had been vacated first. Or the many cross-cultural moments at work, where someone from another culture says something horribly inappropriate in America, but which is OK in their culture. And of course, I should close with the admonition that I am NOT pregnant no matter how the picture looks, just FAT, thanks.

 

[banter]

:lol
LOVEDDDDDDD IT!!!!!!!!!!!

I have had many of "those" letters and I have found out later through the grapevine that
the bragging families were more than dysfunctional!

 

[The Chicken Lady]

Quote:

Ha ha ha! Thanks for the awesome laugh. I'd definitely appreciate a humorous letter like that.

In fact, I totally want to hear the chipmunk nest story. Ha ha.

 

[skand]

You are all HIRED to do my Christmas cards!!!!
Poor me and my limited wording to paper talents. I get the cards, sign all our names, then throw the cards in the trash, I sit and stare at that blank side of the card, trying so hard to think of something clever to say other then, wishing you all a wonderful holiday season full of warmth love and good food.
I hate those ones that have the dog put his foot print inside, like the dog really wants to do it, and like they love that wonderful one black paw print that goes all over the house.

 

[lesliet]

these are just to funny, had to show a co-worker. she is still laughing