Tough love. If he wants you (and I'll bet he does), then he needs to try to help you live, not drag you back down into the hell of addiction just so he can keep the relationship by destroying the woman he thinks he loves. Love does not destroy the beloved. We know what that is--it's the selfish manipulation of an addict. He's chained to this stuff and he wants you there with him with chains on, like him--the way it's always been before.
Call your son and go to him. It sounds like he loves you very much. You can live happily without a man if yours doesn't love you enough to learn how to hate and walk away from chemical dependency. I'll bet though, that if anything can wake him up, it could be the fear of losing you.