Weird ? - what would make a package of sausage blow up?

Just to be clear...I would never feed potentially tainted sausage to turkeys. I like turkeys. I'll have to test the sausage first to make sure it's okay for them. Hey Em! Come help me test this sausage.
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Wait...there's gonna be turkeys there too?!?!?!


RSVP...Sorry Gritty, Em can't attend either. I'm gonna be doing whatever Imp is doing AND having my teeth pulled. Just split my share up between SirBird and MFB.

But Em, if you feed the sausage to the turkeys, either they will love you and make their relatives and co-horts not come near you ever again OR it'll kill them off, which will in turn terrify the relatives and co-horts making them run far, far, FAR away from you.

You've made a fatal mistake in that you assume turkeys have normal, rational thinking. they do not. Turkeys only have horrid, evil, hatred of me. That's all they think about 24/7. Raising babies? "These poults will be perfect Em killers." Eating? "If I eat enough maybe I'll be large enough to give Em a heart attack." See? That's all they think about.
 
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Gritty, I don't eat sausage normally. I definitely would not eat tainted sausage. I'll send Bird, Spook, Sourland, and MFB over though.
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But Em, if you feed the sausage to the turkeys, either they will love you and make their relatives and co-horts not come near you ever again OR it'll kill them off, which will in turn terrify the relatives and co-horts making them run far, far, FAR away from you.

You've made a fatal mistake in that you assume turkeys have normal, rational thinking. they do not. Turkeys only have horrid, evil, hatred of me. That's all they think about 24/7. Raising babies? "These poults will be perfect Em killers." Eating? "If I eat enough maybe I'll be large enough to give Em a heart attack." See? That's all they think about.

Mr Turkey says he is a gentle, kind and loving bird who wishes to see you happy. He's also a 10 y/o (or 11? I forget) BBB who was supposed to be on the Thanksgiving table, but he's too stinking nice. So he's a pet now instead.
 
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You've made a fatal mistake in that you assume turkeys have normal, rational thinking. they do not. Turkeys only have horrid, evil, hatred of me. That's all they think about 24/7. Raising babies? "These poults will be perfect Em killers." Eating? "If I eat enough maybe I'll be large enough to give Em a heart attack." See? That's all they think about.

Mr Turkey says he is a gentle, kind and loving bird who wishes to see you happy. He's also a 10 y/o (or 11? I forget) BBB who was supposed to be on the Thanksgiving table, but he's too stinking nice. So he's a pet now instead.

He's a double agent! He's not really nice, he's just sending information back to the enemy. Eat him quick!



And don't tell him I said that.
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Mr Turkey says he is a gentle, kind and loving bird who wishes to see you happy. He's also a 10 y/o (or 11? I forget) BBB who was supposed to be on the Thanksgiving table, but he's too stinking nice. So he's a pet now instead.

He's a double agent! He's not really nice, he's just sending information back to the enemy. Eat him quick!



And don't tell him I said that.
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I've rocked him the same as my kids. He walks on a leash. He's just a big puppy in a turkey suit. WUV my baby turkey wurkey.

Plus, if we eat him now, he's going to be all nasty and tough.

The reason he will NEVER been served on a dinner plate and when he gets too old to go on, he will make a trip to the vet same as the dogs - Grant was 18 months old and was about 3 feet from stepping on a 7 foot rattlesnake. Mr Turkey RAN over, bowled the baby over and killed that snake. DH ran out when Grant shrieked and was ready to kill Mr Turkey then and there when he saw what Mr Turkey had in his beak.

Mr Turkey is NOT dinner. Never, ever, ever.
 
You guys will never be able to convince that turkeys are anything but pure evil. that turkey probably PLANTED the snake there to begin with! Setting a trap for me!
 
Only on BYC could we take a thread from expanding sausage, to southern foods, to moonshine, to evil turkeys.
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