what and how should I say it?

[TexasChickenLady]

Thank you all! I honestly belive she's doing it for spite because I know her. However there is one thing I haven't tried yet and thats pray about it. I do know that I am better than this and I do know whats most important. But I still feel that one day one day something will be said and Im gonna explode. So I think maybe dh and i really need to pray for her and ect. Thank you. Oh yeah by the way, I was fine with my ds going to sunday school at her church, however, she messed up by lieing to me. How can grown woman lie such a silly lie? Ok Im done with this subject and I've got chores waiting. Thank you all!

 

[Henrietta23]

I haven't read all the posts but I understand your point about your daughters name, which I think is beautiful! I am Kristin, not Kris or Krissy or Kristie. As a very shy kid it was very hard for me to correct people who didn't call me by my true name. I had to get over it!

I'd agree with those who say just keep reminding people what your daughter's name is and that you don't care for the nickname. She'll reach a point when she decides for herself what she likes.
A bit off track but have to share. I have a beautiful niece named Julie. MIL really wanted her to be named Katherine. SIL caught MIL calling Julia Katherine under her breath numerous times when she was an infant!

 

[Harley's girl]

I would politely every time say it's Delaney grandma.

My daughter is Alexis, so many people want to call her Alex. I smile politely and say HER name is Alexis. And now that she is old enough she does the same thing. We do occasionally call her Lexi. And my mom refuses to spell it the way we do. I try to keep things as short and simple as can be. Lexi. My mom insists on putting an "E" at the end of her name. I tell her every time, granny we spell it Lexi. And Alexis will correct her too. You could set down and have a heart to heart. Tell them how it makes you feel when they call her Laney. Best of luck to you. It is a hard thing to understand until you have gone through it.

 

[rooster-red]

I'd let it go.
Someday your child will correct "granny" and it will have much more impact than anything you could say to her.

 

[ruth]

The more people who love your children - the better your children will be - and your children will be even better if they don't have to grow up hearing you talk bad about the grandmother they know and love and who loves them. Remember that and let everything else go.

 

[Mom 2em All]

Sounds like your stepmother has a lying problem. A dear friend of mine is a chronic liar. I used to get upset, however, her lies are minor- and nobody is ever harmed by what she says. Her lies always make her stories seem a little more dramatic, etc. I can even tell now when she goes from truth to lie, but it has taken years. I honestly do not think she can help it. Because I value our friendship, I let it go.

As far as nicknames go, I would let it go. I have experienced both sides of the nickname game. My brothers name is Christopher. We always called him Christopher, not Chris. Whenever anyone called him 'Chris', my mom would correct them. His wife now calls him, 'Chris'. Ugh. But its not his nickname that truly bothers me- its his wife. I have issues with her on other areas. He himself isn't bothered when someone calls him Chris.

His son's name is Robert. My mom called the baby, 'Bobbie'-and instantly his wife had my brother correct her. No way were we to call him anything but Robert. Being on the corrrected side, I can say that the nickname thing shouldn't really matter if it is not insulting in any way. My brother has always always called me, "Sissy". So, I called myself "Aunt Sissy" to the baby. Oh no- his wife won't allow that. I am Aunt Kim. Terms of endearment is what a nickname is.
My husbands family is full of nicknames, in fact, if you ask someone what his and his brothers real names are-they have to really think hard to get them right.

My kids also have nicknames. My stepdaughter has been called 'Bug' since she was born. Even her coaches call her Bug. My youngest kids have been given versions of their own names ie; Kay for Kayla, Ry for Ryan, Tiff for Tiffany...also Tiffy, Princess,Punkin etc. heh heh heh...my youngest answers to Tater, Kayla Potata, Katie, Kaylala, etc.

Our oldest is pregnant with her first child. I truly do not like the name she has chosen. At all. It isn't an easy name to make a nickname out of either. But when one comes up, I hope I will be allowed to use it- or else he will be called something like Pumpkin.

 

[Rhett&SarahsMom]

My grandfather hated my given name and told my mom that he was going to call me "Molly"
My mom said "That's fine. But you wont be seeing Martha"

I grew up having a great relationship with my grandfather.

Some names "need" a shortened version. Delaney is not one.(I love the name BTW)
When I was pregnant withg our daughter my MIL wanted us to name her after her mother, who had passed. As is the tradition I guess. I refused. I didnt like the name, for my daughter anyway. Not even as a middle name. For the first few months of her life my MIL saw little of her granddaughter because every time she was here she would call her "Anna" Not her given name Sarah.

I would correct her. You named your daughter Delaney. Not Laney.

 

[Buff Hooligans]

Why not throw Granny a whammy and start calling your daughter "Bob".

 

[Becaco]

From what I am reading she IS doing it for spite. If you correct her, she will just keep on and it probably will give her great satisfaction knowing she is getting to you.

I would say just ignore it.

 

[Chicken Boo]

Your daughter will let people know what she wants to be called soon enough. It may change several times as she grows up. Mine did. Have you asked her if she minds the nickname? I have a few friends that I am still in touch with that still call me by one of the old itterations of my name. I see it as a special connection with them that only they have.

As for the other issue, I am all for children being exposed to as many religions as possible. However, mom SHOULD KNOW where her child is at all times. The lie should be addressed and it should be made clear that it is inexcusable and unacceptable and may not happen again in as direct but not emotional way possible.

Just MHO.