Will I Ever Get Used To This???

[rebbetzin]

Living with my husband is interesting at times...
You would think after almost 20 years of marriage,
I would get used to his "knowing" things
he can't possibly know, but somehow does.

Last night about 7:15pm, Rich says "I feel like having Grouper."
(a type of fish that I have never seen here in the Grocery stores)

I said "Nobody in town has Grouper."

He said, "Call Uri at Rincon Market."
Uri is the local "One and Only Official Fish Monger" in Tucson.

But, I have never even seen Grouper at Rincon Market.
(a local specialty Grocery and Deli)

I said "Uri won't be working this time of night, and besides,
I don't think he has any Grouper either."

Rich says "Just call him."

So, I get on the phone to Rincon Market, I ask if anyone is still at the Meat Counter.
The girl says "Yes, hold on."
And lo and behold, Uri answers the phone!

I ask if he has any Grouper, He says "Yes, it just came in 20 minutes ago,
the truck was very late tonight." I told him we would be right over.

When we got to Rincon Market, I discovered from chatting with Uri,
that he had been trying for about two months to get some Grouper,
and it "just so happened" to arrive just as Rich was getting a taste for it!!

Here is what I call "Rich's Glorious Grouper"



He sauted the fish in Olive Oil, and butter with a sauce made with Lemon, Dill, Balsamic Vinegar and sprinkled with Candied Sliced Almonds

Served with Trader Joe's Beer Battered Vidalia Onion Rings,
Homemade Potato salad and Cole slaw with Ranch Dressing.

It was quite yummy!!

 

[sourland]

I am married to a woman who 'knows' things like that. She also reads my mind frequently - forces me to behave.

It's been far longer than 20 years for us, and I am still not used to her foresight.

 

[MeatKing]

hmm, see I would say, that was a set up! lol... But I am very suspicious like that!

I would've told hubby, ok if they do have, your going to get it!

 

[rebbetzin]

I am married to a woman who 'knows' things like that. She also reads my mind frequently - forces me to behave.

It's been far longer than 20 years for us, and I am still not used to her foresight.

When we were first married, for a couple of years I tried to surprise him for his birthday. Both times, he "saw" what I was getting him, in advance, which would have been fine, if he had just kept it to himself..But, he liked to "tease" me with knowing what it was ahead of time.

I spent months paying off a sterling silver belt buckle I designed for him. I told NO ONE about it. I had the jeweler who made our wedding rings, make the belt buckle.The day I brought it home and hid it, he "saw" it in his mind. As he was walking past the room in which it was hid.

Here is a photo of it.




At dinner, he, asked me "So how are Ken and Barbie?" (Ken and Barbara Newman, owners of the Jewelery Store.) I said,"I suppose they are fine." and tried to change the subject. To which he said "Yes, I like silver." Now I was mad, but pretended not to be, and didn't let on I had seen Ken and Barbara just a few hours ago.

After dinner, he went out to play with our new puppy. And while doing the dishes, I was talking in my head to the Holy One. Saying "Why in the world when I have been so careful to not say a word to anyone, would you reveal my secret to Rich?" "I really don't get it!" I was upset with the Holy One!
A few minutes later, my husband walks through the kitchen, and says "And so why are you giving the Holy One a hard time because He chose to let me know about it?"

OY!!

The next year, again, I attempt to surprise him. I wanted to get him a special jacket worn on the Shabbat by Jewish men. The very nice ones come from New York City. At that time were helping a Russian family here in Tucson, whose daughter lived in NYC. I called her about three months before his birthday to see if she could get me a catalog from one of those men's stores (this was before I had a computer).

She said, "Since you have been so kind to my parents, let me buy the jacket for you. I will send it to my mom, that way he will be surprised.
Well, the very day the jacket arrived into Tucson, (unbeknownst to me) my husband and I were having lunch together. All of a sudden, he gets this odd look on his face, then he smiled.

He then put his foot up, he was wearing cowboy boots, and he said with a sly grin, "It won't go with my cowboy boots."
I honestly had not a clue what he was talking about.. Then he said, "And by the way how is Irenia?"
Oh no.. not again.. Irenia is the daughter, in NYC that bought the jacket!! I was just flabbergasted at his knowing this time!!
Needless to say, I no longer try to surprise him on his birthday.

I was not a happy camper! I have come to think that maybe these things happen so I will trust my husband when he tells me something.

 

[nok13]

funny....

is there a large jewish community in tucson? my duaghter was there for six months she went to pima college to take courses on native american studies just for herself (grandma and grandpa paid for apartment and allowed her to use her college savings only for the courses, not for just hanging around); she found americans very unfriendly, compared to here where even strangers will invite for coffee and cake, especially a single person w/o partner... the only people in her studies classes that inivted her to events and go out for an evenign were hispanics or from the reservation hearby... i guess their cultures are more people /soical/group oriented also, like here.

she said the 'basic' americans didnt even ask her about her family life, or seemed curious about her in any way... she is still in contact with some of the peole that she did manage to make friends with... here, she is very much a people person, the center of interesting groups of people, and like many kibbutz kids, very open and trusting of most poeple.. her english is also very good.

only towards the end she went to some jewish families for shabbat because, although she isnt not at all relgiuos , most of us have shabbat dinner, light candles, ans sit around as a family, even i do with my thai husband...

she really loves tucson, visited my parents also on weekends, loves the desert (desert ecology is also a speicallity of hers) and photographing it, but she found the rest of the poeple lacking in 'openess' and 'warm heartedness'. she also tried to avoid the israeli cliques taht might have been there, who knows....

anyway, the sonoran desert has been a main subject for her art/photos..

 

[HeatherLynn]

Thats really odd that she found them that way. We took a road trip out west and met some of the friendliest people. Only places not as friendly was a town in Utah and one in New Mexico. My sister lived out there for several years and loved it though. She still has some come visit her now and again. Its a great place for artistic inspiration. She would hike and then come home and paint or sew ( quilts).

 

[rebbetzin]

funny....

is there a large jewish community in tucson? my duaghter was there for six months she went to pima college to take courses on native american studies just for herself (grandma and grandpa paid for apartment and allowed her to use her college savings only for the courses, not for just hanging around); she found americans very unfriendly, compared to here where even strangers will invite for coffee and cake, especially a single person w/o partner... the only people in her studies classes that inivted her to events and go out for an evenign were hispanics or from the reservation hearby... i guess their cultures are more people /soical/group oriented also, like here.

she said the 'basic' americans didnt even ask her about her family life, or seemed curious about her in any way... she is still in contact with some of the peole that she did manage to make friends with... here, she is very much a people person, the center of interesting groups of people, and like many kibbutz kids, very open and trusting of most poeple.. her english is also very good.

only towards the end she went to some jewish families for shabbat because, although she isnt not at all relgiuos , most of us have shabbat dinner, light candles, ans sit around as a family, even i do with my thai husband...

she really loves tucson, visited my parents also on weekends, loves the desert (desert ecology is also a speicallity of hers) and photographing it, but she found the rest of the poeple lacking in 'openess' and 'warm heartedness'. she also tried to avoid the israeli cliques taht might have been there, who knows....

anyway, the sonoran desert has been a main subject for her art/photos..

They say there are over 50,000 Jews here in Tucson. Less than probably 10% of them are affiliated with a synagogue. Here in the Southwest, most of the "founders" of the early cities and businesses were Jewish.

Hmmmm? There could be some reasons why people are not so "open and friendly here"... Being we are close to the border of Mexico, there is heavy drug traffic, human smuggling, car theft, home invasion robbery. We are a very high crime area. People tend to be suspicious of stangers. For sure most don't open their homes to people they don't really know. Lots of people running "scams" to get money, lots of identity theft, kidnapping, etc. I don't even answer the door when I am here alone in the Daytime! We get "Tweekers" with all sorts of stories of why they need money. At all hours of the night too! Recently at 2:00am my husband answered the door, to have some obviously "high" fellow asking for money. So.. when you have that kind of enviroment, you tend to not be real open to strangers.

For the most part, though, I find people in Tucson to be friendly. I wouldn't judge all Americans by how one is treated here in Tucson. It does pay to make friends, and to choose them wisely when you do.

 

[nok13]

:0 and then poeple aske me if its safe to come visit here because the travel advisory people put out warnings constantly; i get them in my email... but here, we dont lock doors (in the city , yes, but still not that kind of security that u are talking about. people answer doors, phones, will strike up conversations with u on busses, invite u over, most conversations here eventually get to asking where u live and do u know so and so... and where are they and do u have their phone number etc... although i can see changes here also. )...it all seems a bit isolating; i guess im used to being surrounded by people and doing everything in groups/herds... my parents really like it in their 'gated' neighbhorhood; i just find it wierd that u dcant just pop over to someone , knock on a door and ask for a cup of sugar or milk. here, even if u dont know the poeple, u still can do that without them thinking u are scamming them, and terrorists dont come knocking ont he front door.

 

[cassie]

:0 and then poeple aske me if its safe to come visit here because the travel advisory people put out warnings constantly; i get them in my email... but here, we dont lock doors (in the city , yes, but still not that kind of security that u are talking about. people answer doors, phones, will strike up conversations with u on busses, invite u over, most conversations here eventually get to asking where u live and do u know so and so... and where are they and do u have their phone number etc... although i can see changes here also. )...it all seems a bit isolating; i guess im used to being surrounded by people and doing everything in groups/herds... my parents really like it in their 'gated' neighbhorhood; i just find it wierd that u dcant just pop over to someone , knock on a door and ask for a cup of sugar or milk. here, even if u dont know the poeple, u still can do that without them thinking u are scamming them, and terrorists dont come knocking ont he front door.

My mother lived in an upscale gated community for years. Made her feel safe and secure. I thought the whole idea was silly and I really hated going through a security checkpoint every time I went to visit my mother. Then there was a rash of thefts and burglaries. Security was stepped up on the borders because no one knew where the thieves were getting in. Turned out the thieves were already there. It was a bunch of spoiled high school kids that were residents. Since they lived there, they knew the time of the comings and goings of each of their neighbors and, in many cases, knew where the spare keys were hidden. I forget how they got caught. Maybe somebody came home early. I thought the whole thing was funny. My mother didn't.

 

[nok13]

beware the enemy from within...