Worst cooking experience

[Amyable]

I worked in a camp kitchen one year; we'd cook for up to 400 people at a meal. Cookie dough was made in a giant stand mixer, obviously using very large amounts of ingredients. Yet somehow I managed to translate tablespoons of salt into cups. I think we caught my boo-boo before baking and sorta tempered the salt, but oh my

In college we had dinner parties on Thursday nights, and my two roomies and I were usually the cooks. We made chicken and rice once; who knew you aren't supposed to stir the rice as it cooks? Congealed white goop is what you get.

And not really cooking, but I set fire to my folks' kitchen when I was 18. I put a cast iron pan of bacon grease on the stove to melt to pour over the dog's food. Who has time to wait for it on low heat? I cranked it up to high, and at that moment my dad came home and needed help unloading some stuff out of the truck. A short time later we hear glass breaking in the house. We both look at each other with confusion, and glance around the corner. Black smoke is pouring out the windows. Oh.....my.....Lord. THe smoke was so thick we couldn't see out the big bay windows in the dining room. The flames had just started licking their way up the cabinets, and the breaking glass was from the microwave door. The smoke alarm never went off; we joke that it must have fainted at the terror of a real fire. On the bright side, mom and dad got a refurbished kitchen that year, although doing dishes in the bathtub all summer was a downer. That cast iron pan is about the only thing that came out unscathed; it now hangs on the wall, a pair of chickadees painted on it by my uncle, as a reminder to never walk away from bacon grease.

 

[natrgatr]

Once upon a time, when I was newly divorced, but still a good cook, I was short on ingredients to make gravy for my pork chops. No Milk! No Problem! I've seen them make sauces with wine. Sauce ... gravy...same thing, right? Wine...nope, all out. Guinness Stout (very DARK beer)...I got plenty! Guinness Gravy? Not even IRON STOMACH me could eat that!

Don't laugh about a bachelor having Guinness, but not milk. You have to have your priorities. At least I never used it on my cereal!

 

[herfrds]

I started cooking at age 4, 34 years ago.
First thing I made was a can of soup.

Thinking back over these years the one thing that sticks out in my mind was catching the oven on fire.
I was making pizza for dinner and I just love cheese so I shredded the whole block onto the pizza, well it melted all over and landed on the heat element and caught on fire.
I had stepped outside, but when I came back in my oldest sister was yelling at me that the oven was on fire. She wouldn't let me rescue the pizza before she threw a whole box of baking soda into the oven. cannot remember what we ate that night.

As for the worst cook in the family it's my oldest sister.
Years ago she tried to impress this guy she was dating by making barbeque chicken, bannana cream pie and some side dish.
Well the chicken recipe was one my mom left for her. I called for microwaving the chicken for 15 minutes then putting it on the grill for so long and topping with barbeque sauce.
What was left out was it was suppose to be thawed chicken.

The pie you could eat with a straw. It sat for 2 days and it never set up.
Asked her what the foamy white stuff on top was, meringue.

Only person I know who can screw up Jello and instant pudding. Get the straws out.

I still remember her first Thanksgiving because she kept calling all morning.
To break it down.
20# turkey was not thawed out, Thanksgiving morning.
4 potatos for 6 people for mashed potatos.
Forgot to remove the giblet bag too.
Stove Top stuffing was crunchy.

Thank goodness her present hubby can cook or they would all starve.

 

[Tala]

Generally I'm a decent cook, but I've had a few doozies. I once made some "clean out the fridge" soup that was pretty awful. Not sure how I messed that up.

Since we moved into this house I burned up a teapot. Still miss that one. Can't remember what I ran off and did while it cooked, but it boiled dry and I caught it when the bottom of it was turning red (yes I remembered to grab a potholder first!!).

I usually manage to burn stuff in the crock pot. See mine doesn't have a timer, just "high, low and keep warm" settings. Well seems like most recipes call for 6 hours on low, but I either work or sleep for 8+ hours at a time. I was super frustrated! I started plugging my crock pot into a christmas light timer so it would turn off after 6 hours.

Also I put things on the oven rack to dry. Hubby does NOT EVER remeber to check before he cranks up the oven. Fortunately, I only put things in there that won't melt.
Hubbs DID set a tupperware dish down on a hot burner once, that's cheap no big deal, he THEN put the melty plastic on my BRAND SPANKIN NEW butcher block countertop!!!!!!!!!!!!

There's still a funky looking spot, despite me trying to sand it off

I made cornbread in cast iron over a camp fire that was burned on the bottom but barely done on top - but it was edible given the cirucmstances. I'd say I generally do fairly good at campfire cooking