Writing goals

[Lacy Duckwing]

Now I kinda want to check my doc for repetitive things... Thanks to ProWritingAid, I realized that I use "was" a lot, but I'm not ready to start cutting those out, when they probably should all go.

 

[Isabella7Storm5]

I don't think it has to do with her being non human

I feel like she’d have less options when it comes to writing the distaste for socialization tho
Just based on what she looks like I guess
Idk

 

[Lacy Duckwing]

I feel like she’d have less options when it comes to writing the distaste for socialization tho
Just based on what she looks like I guess
Idk

I have actually discovered that it's harder to write human emotions than animals... Like with a dog, it can growl, whine, put ears forward, tuck tail between legs- a human? What can they do? Cross their arms? It doesn't help when they only have one arm.

 

[Somewhere_In_The_Clouds]

And then you forget her eyes were closed and start writing things that she could only describe if she saw it, then write her closing her eyes when they're already closed... I've done that too many times.

That's actually beautiful. Maybe there's places it needs to be cut, but I wouldn't cut that piece.

That's probably one of my favourite ones I definitely don't feel it's super over used at this point. In fact, in what I have with the actual story it's not really been used yet? Except for like her falling a sleep or pretending to sleep a few times. I just know with everything else I've written it's a default action, mostly for trying to block stuff out.

 

[Isabella7Storm5]

Arr naarrrr
There’s like a million of theeemmm

(I’m being sarcastic)

 

[Isabella7Storm5]

I have actually discovered that it's harder to write human emotions than animals... Like with a dog, it can growl, whine, put ears forward, tuck tail between legs- a human? What can they do? Cross their arms? It doesn't help when they only have one arm.

it’s so fun to make a human mad

Jaws tightening, cheeks burning, rapid blinking, pulse in ears, pulse in fists, biting onto the inside of your cheek, Stuttered speech, heavy breathing.

And then when I try animals it’s like…he growled…aawwww man he was sssoo angry…his fur stood up…uh…yeah…

 

[Lacy Duckwing]

Arr naarrrr
There’s like a million of theeemmm

(I’m being sarcastic)

Real quick with "the," it's often secretly misused. Most of the time, what is needed is an "a" or "an", but we accidentally use "the" instead. (I often fail at this myself as it's still new to me!)

"The" is often used when there's something the character knows and is familiar with. She held the key tightly. Letting go would be like letting go of life itself.

"A" or "an" is often used for something unfamiliar to the character, or is not entirely important. A raindrop fell, sliding down the window like a little stream of blood. Or reusing the above: She picked a a key. Hopefully it could get her out of here.

 

[Lacy Duckwing]

it’s so fun to make a human mad

Jaws tightening, cheeks burning, rapid blinking, pulse in ears, pulse in fists, biting onto the inside of your cheek, Stuttered speech, heavy breathing.

And then when I try animals it’s like…he growled…aawwww man he was sssoo angry…his fur stood up…uh…yeah…

Maybe it's just because I'm move familiar with animals than people? Or at least have written them more? Those are definitely wonderful examples. I need to work more with people and get more comfortable with writing them.

On those though, the clenched jaw is a bit repetitive for me. Jintao seems to always be doing it, and nothing else.

 

[Isabella7Storm5]

Real quick with "the," it's often secretly misused. Most of the time, what is needed is an "a" or "an", but we accidentally use "the" instead. (I often fail at this myself as it's still new to me!)

"The" is often used when there's something the character knows and is familiar with. She held the key tightly. Letting go would be like letting go of life itself.

"A" or "an" is often used for something unfamiliar to the character, or is not entirely important. A raindrop fell, sliding down the window like a little stream of blood. Or reusing the above: She picked a a key. Hopefully it could get her out of here.

A/an doesn’t work for plural nouns tho so thankfully the is an invisible word for the most part

 

[Lacy Duckwing]

A/an doesn’t work for plural nouns tho so thankfully the is an invisible word for the most part

Good point. Like I said, I'm still new at that, and oftentimes "the" just feels like it reads better.