It wasn't long ago that the topic about how much money to spend on Xmas gifts on the kids came up in our family, via livechat cam (we live far from the family so we get to see each other this way and chat). The topic was started by my sister in law, which was very surprising to me and my husband since of course we know they have fallen on hard times like many other people we know. and even us, things are quite tight.
Anyhow I had already had a short discussion with my dh in regards to xmas gifts for my kids, something I posted on another thread on xmas frugality. But as my family began to share how much they are planning on spending on each kid I began to feel inadequate. Even more when they asked me what we were planning. So I told him, this year, both kids combined, just 100 dollars, not counting a few stocking stuffers which is budgeted to 25 and under. GASP....was I serious...that is the looks I got!!!! They are prepared to spend between 300 to 400 per kid!! They said I wouldn't have much under the tree and the kids would be disappointed :-(
I have been going over board for years in buying them toys and other things they barely touch, so this year my dh and I decided its time to teach them what xmas is really about. we are buying them a bunch of craft items, colouring books, paints, blank canvasses etc...they love to paint, and colour and do crafts, build things etc...so instead of buying all those action figure toys that will lose its luster within the first day we agree don something they use on a daily basis.
We also agreed at least one gift will have to be hand made, so for my little guy who loves chalk we are making a wall chalk board, and for my daughter we are making her a jewellery box for all her costume jewellery she had laying around. these 2 items will cost us nothing as we already have those supplies laying about, the chalk paint was bought in spring, as I was going to put a board outside but it rained soo much I never got around to it.
Even the kids have to make a gift if they want to put something under the tree for mom and dad. I will help them make their dad's gift and dad will help them with mine. I explained to them I want them to know its not about how much people spend on them, its about the gesture and the thought, and spending time together as a family doing things.
I told my dd that this year she and I can make xmas cookies and place them in nice xmas tins we have and give those out for gifts to her teacher and principal as well as her bus driver and the mail people, this I shared with my family and they said that while it was thoughtful its just had CHEAP spelled all over it.
I mean my sister in law, she makes less money than I do, I am full time at my job and she is part time at her job, and still she rather not pay her bills and spend a couple hundred dollars on each kid. I mean there is nothing wrong with spending more if you have it to spend, but when you don't, you just don't.
so I was livid over this, my family thinks changing my ways for xmas is just being a grinchy cheapo!!!
but it doesn't end there, I brought it up at work and the girls at work apart from 2 of my closest coworkers think the same...everyone around me is prepared to skip out on household bills just so they can spend that 200 to 400 bucks per kid. I rather pay my bills and provide them with a stress free holiday throughout and not worry about having my hydro cut or telephone etc... or having to deal with the bank over late mortgage payments (which I do not have, but my family members do, and 3 of them are already behind on their hydro by a couple months)
Am i being a grinch?? I don't think I am, but now I feel bad and doubtful that my kids will enjoy xmas day gift opening. This is why I moved 16 hours away from them, I should have just avoided the conversation!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ema
Anyhow I had already had a short discussion with my dh in regards to xmas gifts for my kids, something I posted on another thread on xmas frugality. But as my family began to share how much they are planning on spending on each kid I began to feel inadequate. Even more when they asked me what we were planning. So I told him, this year, both kids combined, just 100 dollars, not counting a few stocking stuffers which is budgeted to 25 and under. GASP....was I serious...that is the looks I got!!!! They are prepared to spend between 300 to 400 per kid!! They said I wouldn't have much under the tree and the kids would be disappointed :-(
I have been going over board for years in buying them toys and other things they barely touch, so this year my dh and I decided its time to teach them what xmas is really about. we are buying them a bunch of craft items, colouring books, paints, blank canvasses etc...they love to paint, and colour and do crafts, build things etc...so instead of buying all those action figure toys that will lose its luster within the first day we agree don something they use on a daily basis.
We also agreed at least one gift will have to be hand made, so for my little guy who loves chalk we are making a wall chalk board, and for my daughter we are making her a jewellery box for all her costume jewellery she had laying around. these 2 items will cost us nothing as we already have those supplies laying about, the chalk paint was bought in spring, as I was going to put a board outside but it rained soo much I never got around to it.
Even the kids have to make a gift if they want to put something under the tree for mom and dad. I will help them make their dad's gift and dad will help them with mine. I explained to them I want them to know its not about how much people spend on them, its about the gesture and the thought, and spending time together as a family doing things.
I told my dd that this year she and I can make xmas cookies and place them in nice xmas tins we have and give those out for gifts to her teacher and principal as well as her bus driver and the mail people, this I shared with my family and they said that while it was thoughtful its just had CHEAP spelled all over it.
I mean my sister in law, she makes less money than I do, I am full time at my job and she is part time at her job, and still she rather not pay her bills and spend a couple hundred dollars on each kid. I mean there is nothing wrong with spending more if you have it to spend, but when you don't, you just don't.
so I was livid over this, my family thinks changing my ways for xmas is just being a grinchy cheapo!!!
but it doesn't end there, I brought it up at work and the girls at work apart from 2 of my closest coworkers think the same...everyone around me is prepared to skip out on household bills just so they can spend that 200 to 400 bucks per kid. I rather pay my bills and provide them with a stress free holiday throughout and not worry about having my hydro cut or telephone etc... or having to deal with the bank over late mortgage payments (which I do not have, but my family members do, and 3 of them are already behind on their hydro by a couple months)
Am i being a grinch?? I don't think I am, but now I feel bad and doubtful that my kids will enjoy xmas day gift opening. This is why I moved 16 hours away from them, I should have just avoided the conversation!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ema
