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Oh My!! I wasn't going to tell about my moment in the spotlight.... until I read yours!!!
I was 13 yrs old, 7th grade, and I was feeling a little cramping/nauseated, but didn't know why. I started my first cycle right before we had practice for Square Dancing. While we were dancing, I felt something wet run down my legs and I heard a classmate ask what was on the floor, I said it looked like ketchup, then I realized it was from me! At the time, we were learning about our changing bodies in class (boys in another room learning), but during dance we were all together.....some of my classmates giggled/snickered, and our teacher hushed them and she had me go to the nurse's for needed supplies and clean-up. I was xtremely shy at the time and that day was so very embarrasing. I totally feel for you!
well my most embarassing moment was well before I got into chickens or ducks. I was going to the mall with my six children. My six your old son saw a teenager, with a mohawk, hanging out by the door. We had to pass this teenager as we were going into the mall. All of a sudden my son stopped and ask the teenager why he had a chicken head. Thank god the teenager happen to be a nice one and explained why and how he got his crop to stay up. I kept telling him I was sorry. But the boy stated that he liked it and was the only one that he knew that has a chicken head instead of a mohawk.
I couldn't actually think of any till I read all that were posted so far. Here are a few:
1. As a young single woman out on her own when I was in my early 20s I decided to join a gym. I was there for the first time and this really cute guy was showing me around and teaching me how to use some of the equipment. Another trainer came over and I was enjoying the attention of the two of them when suddenly one said, "Um, I think you need to use the bathroom." Sure enough, that time of the month had come early....I hadn't signed up for a membership at that point and I never went back.
2. I was in 5th grade walking home from school. I was a crossing guard so I got home much later than the other kids. One day I had to "go" really bad and I didn't quite make it home. And of course the boy down the street I had a crush on rode by on his bike just as I let loose. He stopped and just said, "I think your lunch box is leaking." That was 34 years ago now and it still haunts me!
I tossed my old hosiery (with snags) in the "rag bag" to use for tomato tie-backs in the summer. My young boys (ages 3 and 5) found them and took them outside. Without my knowing, they filled them with sand from the sand box, stood up on the picnic table, and hurled them through the air onto the roof of the house. Several days later, I'm outside with the neighbors and I look up and see my pantyhose strewn across the roof of the house! My husband had to get out the ladder to get them down!
Walking in grass is tricky for me, as I seem to find the valleys and things hidden by long grass and I stumble into them. Walking to work with my 2nd oldest son (we worked night shift together for a few months during spring/summer), I followed him instead of going my route, walking along a ridge near the highway (no sidewalks yet). Rush hour, all traffic at red light got to see me stumble and fall while my son laughed hysterically at me, and take his time helping me up.
Same week, same area, same highway at red light, same time, same son, my route has me going down a hill in front of a Rally's drive-thru....a very busy drive-thru, with a outdoor seating area, also very crowded. Not until then did I trip my foot against a peice of metal barely poking up thru the ground. I fall forward down the hill and roll towards Rally's, in front of traffic at red light, while my son sat down in the grass because he was laughing so hard..... I had to help myself up that time, he couldn't........!
Oh I forgot one...well, this one involves my dog Moses.
When I had to go back home for my father's funeral I'd asked my friend Toni to take care of Moses while I went home. When she came over I was giving her the tour of the place, food, water bowl, etc, etc...
She grabs me and says, "I got it...it will be fine.", then hugs me. I hug her back thanking her when suddenly Moses comes up, from behind and under her butt to come up through the front in between her legs. So, all you see is his BIG black nose below her crotch. She looks down and then looks at me. Her eyes are about to pop out of her face.
She laughs and says, "Whoa buddy...not on the first date!"
I sheepishly apologize and she just bats it off. I felt my face burning I am sure it was a FIERCE red in color.
I have NO idea where he gets that from but I always warn people (men OR women) that he's a crotch dog. He'll go there whether it's the front OR back. Especially when we're interacting and happen to exclude him...like hugging!
OK, most of you have me beat, some of what you wrote I can totally relate to though.
The moment that comes to mind is when I was in a large chain grocery store with my then three year old son (he's 21 now and it still makes me blush) Anyway, he was sitting in the front of the cart and we were chatting, my husband was with us. I got into the check out line and realized that I had forgotten to get a pack of frozen peas. I turned to my husband and asked him if he would go get some peas while I started to unload the grocery's onto the grocery check stand. My son looked up and me and then at his dad walking away, he then leaned around and saw a man standing behind me. He said to the guy. "Hey!" and the guy says "what" and my wonderful child says. "Did you know my mommy's pees has hair?" I turned beet red and prayed the guy didn't get what my son had just said..but apparently other people refer to that part of the anatomy as peeps or some sort of "Pee" area....anyway, I turned to see if he caught the comment and saw that he had his back turned, I was relieved until I saw that he was semi hunched over and his shoulders were shaking....apparently in laughter.
Well, ill have to think about my "corkers" Word for the day!
Though i always ask friends when they are due when I see their muffin-guts (fat tummies) and they say "im not pregnant". But i will add to this later on. as you could imagine, I have MANY.
Wow! My husband was looking at me like I was a bit off last night when I was reading these. I can't breathe when I laugh really hard. Hilarious!
When I was 5, in kindergarten, my teacher would not let us use the restroom at all that day since some kids in the class were goofing off in the restroom the day before. We couldn't even go individually. There was even a potty in the room - but it was her special potty. So, our chairs are up on the desks, we're waiting for the bell and I couldn't hold it anymore. Wide eyed and crying, I let loose. Everyone laughed. The teacher then screamed that she'd have to clean up my mess. She told me to leave and get on the bus. She wouldn't let me call my mom to come get me. I paraded out of the room with my wet sweats and all the way to the bus.
When I was 19, I had a mustang. I just got back from putting the sand bags in the truck at my husband's work since it was rear wheel drive and snow was expected. I hop back in the car and snow just starts coming down like crazy. I, of course, had my sport tires on and hadn't switched to my all weathers yet. I managed all the way to the 55/270/255 interchange. A big interchange. So, I, going 30 mph, do several 360s and end up blocking 3 lanes of traffic feeding into each highway. I couldn't get out, so I hop out of the car and start digging. Everyone was honking. Luckily a tow was only a few cars back and got me right again.
And, the best:
My daughter is just about to turn two. She has an amazing mimic ability and vocabulary. I joke with her that her feet are stinky. When ever we get dressed, she sticks her feet in the air and I smell them and say, "Pew - Feeties!" Then she learned to smell mine and jokingly say the same. She recently started walking in the stores instead of in her stroller. She comes up to me in line at Kohl's and sticks her face in my butt. She then yell, "Mommy butt PEW PEW! Whoa, Mommy!" Of course, people came out of the woodwork laughing.