Funniest Things A City Slicker Has Ever Said To You?

[MattalynsBarn]

When I was first learning about chickens I asked my friend, who had over 30 chickens, some very funny questions. Mind you we were kids, really hyper, and for a lot of them I was joking, but they're funny none the less. One of the more funny ones was Me "If you startle a chicken will it lay an egg?" Friend "Hahahaahahaha noooooo if you startle a chicken it's more likely to not lay the egg, and wait until it knows it's safe." Me "Okay, and what if you squeeze a chicken?" Friend "Hahaha what?? No. If you do that the egg is likely to break inside the hen and could kill her." Me "Oh dear... Okay I promise I will not squeeze my chickens" Then we collapsed in a fit of giggles.

 

[Gallusfarm]

A deer hunter friend of mine was talking to a guy about the deer he got that morning, etc. etc. Well the city guy asked "when do they sleep?" Of course the hunter explained. Then the city guy asks, "What do they do when they sleep? Dig a hole or something"?

 

[kelseygirl707]

Quote:
I would pay GOOD money to see that!

What can I say, I chase Bulls in Style

NOT

 

[lauraclaire]

When I first got chickens 1 1/2 years ago, everyone thought I had lost my mind. I told them I was thrilled that I would know where the eggs came from and what the hens were eating as well as knowing they would be treated far better than the poor dears laying eggs for commercial producers. One acquaintance proceeded to tell me that ALL eggs are brown........ the white ones are bleached before being sold!!! I've got 2 Easter eggers in my flock of 6 but unfortunately, they're both laying brown eggs. I would have loved to see what he said about green or blue eggs!!

 

[reveriereptile]

This isn't the funniest thing ever but I thought it was funny at the time. I was on the phone with my sister and she was asking what the difference was between a hen, rooster, and chickens was cause my mom who grew up around chickens couldn't explain it. I thought she was nuts for asking that especially since she is a lot older than me. She didn't know if a chicken was a hen or a term for all of them. I did go on and tell her about pullets and cockerals while on the subject. She then got asking about ducks and geese and what the male and female were called. Then she asked "Are tom turkeys male turkeys?" I couldn't stop laughing over that. Since I was a kid and heard someone refer to a turkey as a tom I knew they were talking about the male especially since Tom is a guys name. I should of probably brought up that you don't need a rooster to get an egg and seen what she would say. Maybe I'll have to bring that up sometime just to see what her and my mom both say or better yet post it on my FB to see what people say.

 

[Skittlez]

I like to give my daughters friends from the city flashlights and send them out to the woods to go "snipe" hunting. Then my husband and I sit around the bonfire watching them and have a good laugh. My daughter participates for fun even though she knows that is a trick. It keeps them entertained for a while. Oh, my woods are safe, no children eating beasts live in the small patch I have.

 

[silkiechick236]

My cousin's wife asked if I was going to kill the turkeys before I plucked them

 

[can you hear me now?]

Quote:
Ouch. Ask her if she likes having hair pulled. Could you imagine plucking something alive? The pain of the bird and the trouble.we would have trying to pluck. No thank you.

 

[Tala]

Quote:
Tom cat = male
Tom turkey = male

duh

 

[mamawolf544]

I had a friend coming over. Mind yoou I have geese chickens ducks turkeys guineas that all free range. And she said will I get poo on the bottom of my shoes? Because I don't want poo on my shoes.
I told her to stay home.