Anyone experienced dead bodies?Update photos/home #149

[I have WHAT in my yard?]

Saw too many deaths, found too many dead, even worked in a morgue for a while.

Death itself can be beautiful, dead bodies are just that - dead. One other person said the something that made you you is missing, and that is very true.

Dead bodies that have been around a while smell awful, no matter what. Most people who die suddenly loose their bowels. this makes a stink too. People who drown are the worst. DH is on a water retrieval team. That is something I could never do! BUt, he says the sooner they are retrieved the sooner the family gets closure.

I too am appalled that the body was brought out of the house uncovered. That was unprofessional. No matter how bad the smell is you cover the body as soon as the ME says you can. I also agree with vicks under your nose, but breathing through my mouth just always seemed to make me taste the stench....

Sorry you had to see that. Sorry for the family. The house could be salvageble, a firm like servpro can get the stink out..

 

[EweSheep]

Well the house is quiet.....no one is there to clean up yet. Either the woman had to find someone or getting the insurance papers going or she is giving the house up totally. She only came just for some clothes but that is about it.

As for the newspaper obit, nothing yet....and the newspaper do NOT charge for any obits. That is very kind of them. Will look into more in the whose who.

 

[justbugged]

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I don't think that it will be possible; they would need to leave ownership of the grave sites to one of the family members. My father owns both his mothers and her sister’s plots, because he was sole heir to them. I have a feeling that ownership will be very difficult to establish after their passing. I don't anticipate my father living to be much older than about 80, but my mother is one of those people that I think will live to be 120. I am not sure that I will outlive her.

She for all her irritating quirks is one of the happiest people I have ever known. She has no idea how passive aggressive I find her behavior. I no longer even attempt to engage when it happens, or point it out to her. I find myself finally giving myself the freedom of not having to be what they wanted me to be. I have always failed at meeting whatever expectations they seemed to have of me.

Now I look back and I know I have been successful at raising my children and running my home, and I can't rely on them to give me validation. My sister has agreed to take on their care as they age, and I am going to let her.
As for shattering her ashes at the gravesite I don’t think that the cemetery allows it. It is a very active cemetery and it is not worth it to me to get caught. It is going to be okay with whatever does happen in the end. I have a few other ideas, and when it is the right time it will be better than what I could have done at the time. I would now rather keep her ashes far from any spite, and anger, and people that don't care for me as much as I think a parent should.

 

[justbugged]

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For a mother to allow her son to live, and die in a place like that could indicate very sick relationship that she had with her son, or it could be that she doesn't have it together enough to even acknowledge that he even existed. Or she is angry that he did that to himself. Either ideas maybe why the family doesn't want to acknowledge that he was loved and care for, because it doesn't really seem that was the case.

 

[TheChickenCameFirst]

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For a mother to allow her son to live, and die in a place like that could indicate very sick relationship that she had with her son, or it could be that she doesn't have it together enough to even acknowledge that he even existed. Or she is angry that he did that to himself. Either ideas maybe why the family doesn't want to acknowledge that he was loved and care for, because it doesn't really seem that was the case.

Allot of parents with morbidly obese children probably don't want to admit that they were/are enabling their children to become like that. I bet the mother thought she was doing good... if he was bedridden, then she must have brought him food

It's very sad. Maybe she is ashamed now and does not want the public knowing anything.

I am sorry you had to see that... must have been horrible. I have never seen a dead body besides those that are all "Prettied up" for funerals. I can't imagine going through that. I hope you're able to get those mental pictures out of your mind, and focus on positive things! It can help us realize how VERY precious life is!

 

[phaethona]

what an intriguing conversation you guys!

we all have very different levels of sensitivity to death, and I think maybe we are so interested when it's around us because we are trying to learn how things relate to our own deaths, and our loved ones. death is scary, we all naturally fear it to some degree, if we didn't, our survival instincts might not have carried us through the evolutionary process. I personally have learned to deal with my own mortality by jumping out of airplanes on a semi-regular basis. It is a very safe sport, but just like any other activity, carries an inherent risk of death. Timing is everything, when I jump, I feel alive. And although I have no control over when or how I'll die, I would rather it happen while Im doing what I love as opposed to a long-suffering disease or drunk driver, etc. I recently lost a friend skydiving, and that has forced me to think about it more thoroughly, but I still jump. his time was cut way too short, as his first son was born a month after the accident, but it is a remarkable thing to see someone die doing what drives their spirit to feel alive, rather than simply trying to not die.
By now it seems I'm rambling, so I digress...

as for the OP, that's truly sad to watch that happen, not just the body, but the whole idea of another fellow man succumbing to his toxic environment.
I agree that the body should have been fully covered, but the responders might not have had a choice, I doubt they were being lazy or unprofessional. It is too bad you had to see it though, that'll probably be one of those weird back-of-your-mind memories for a while to come. maybe it helps to remember that where there once was misery and torment(both physically and emotionally i would imagine), now there is not.

 

[MysticScorpio82]

Death itself can be beautiful, dead bodies are just that - dead.

Well said! I worked at both a nursing home and a hospital. I am no stranger to death. Most of the deaths I witnessed were peaceful, with their family by their side. It was what I would want when my time comes. After the death the bodies become nothing more than the empty shell of the person. For someone who is not used to seeing death, it can be humbling. It forces you to face your own mortality, which is why I think alot of people freak to see a body (barring any emotional attachment).​

 

[TheChickenCameFirst]

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Probably true. It's natural to be interested in it I think. But...

I have to say... Death does not scare me at all!

"No Guilt In Life, No Fear In Death, This Is The Power Of Christ In Me!"

 

[phaethona]

Quote:
Probably true. It's natural to be interested in it I think. But...

I have to say... Death does not scare me at all!

"No Guilt In Life, No Fear In Death, This Is The Power Of Christ In Me!"

Death doesn't really "scare" me either, it's not so much being afraid, there's no point in being afraid of something that is guaranteed(even more than taxes)
I just don't like thinking of me or my kids being without each other, but that's my motivation to make it worthwhile while I still can.
There's a popular quote among skydivers: "Skydivers don't defy death, they ring the doorbell and run away"

 

[Royd]

Quote:
Probably true. It's natural to be interested in it I think. But...

I have to say... Death does not scare me at all!

"No Guilt In Life, No Fear In Death, This Is The Power Of Christ In Me!"

Death doesn't really "scare" me either, it's not so much being afraid, there's no point in being afraid of something that is guaranteed(even more than taxes)
I just don't like thinking of me or my kids being without each other, but that's my motivation to make it worthwhile while I still can.
There's a popular quote among skydivers: "Skydivers don't defy death, they ring the doorbell and run away"

You're too busy saving your own life, to worry about death.