Are there any care givers out there like Me?????????

[oesdog]

Quote:
You dont know how true this statement is! Sometimes I think I'm snorting alot of water lol. I hate to hear that you stopped going to church, Church is where everyone should be welcome no matter what. Does your minister/reverand ever come to visit with you? Maybe you could request that.

I also wanted to add its wonderful to talk to someone who understands when your life is always your home (no going out, no ladies day out type of things). I do wish you were closer it would be wonderful to create a support system wouldnt it.

We have moved away from were we lived and we haven;t gone out of our way to find another church here. We just watch it occationally on TV. Few ministers have much training in care issues and I think a deal of them feel uncomfortable with the ultimate questions it throws up.( Like is God good? or do we have children of a lesser god?)

So No as yet no minister though we laugh and say our boy has JESUS locked in his bedroom! - He is obssesed with religious music and will say he wants Jesus when he really means his CDs on! When he shouts Jesus at the top of his voice my other kids try to get him to wave his hands up in the air just like the old time preachers did. It is very funny!!!!!!!

We are a support system through BYC -!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Distance is something you feel, it is nothing to do with miles! - Grab a coffee and have a chat on BYC - whenever you feel like venting and I am sure someone will pick up. We should make a point to be a support to each other on this thread!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oesdog -

 

[oesdog]

Quote:
Really touched by your story - You are a great girl. I am so sorry that you lost your brother. -

As for my daughter and SIL - they do have a long way to go and lots to learn. That will come with help. You are doing great with your child. I was a young mum too so understand. By the time I was 21 yrs old DH and I had 4 kids and I was nursing my mother- in - law who sadly died of Cancer when my daughter was only 6 months old. Things are different in this new generation of young folk though and so there are a lot more expectation. My daughter has to take a lot on yes and take responsibility of were she is at. She also has a heart condition which means at the moment in the later stages of her pregnancy and the birth will need more care than I did!!! She is a good kid and certainly helps me out a lot!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SIL is trying his best ( They are not married - so he could have walked away, he is only 19 yrs old and this is his first girlfriend so he is very scared indeed!)

Oesdog -

 

[cheri222]

I have 2 sons with Mental Health issues. One of my favorite sayings is "I feel like im in jail" or "they're holding me hostage". I work full time nights as a nurse and dh works full time days. I stay up all day and deal with life. It's very hard to take "me" time but you have to do it. If something happens to you, they will all go on! Even if its only 1 hr a day, take it and do something for you. Cup of tea, read, watch a show. Caregiver stress is the worst and it can make you hate those you love the most. If its church you want, find a way to get there. Maybe as a trade off to your daughter she could come to your house while you go to church. At church you may find people to help or least gain comfort. I have a chair and table at the back of our property along the woods, they can't see me when im there. I take a coffee and sit and relax. Its funny to hear them looking for me, this is always the last place they look. I would invite you over for some me time but Ireland is just too far. Hugs.

 

[oesdog]

Glad you found a nice place to hide and rest.

I hide in the chicken coop or the greenhouse! - yeap good to take those all important me times!
To be honest church isn;t on the top of our adgenda right now. Anyhow I believe you find God within the hearts of others sometimes its hard to find him within the walls of a church biulding?

Oesdog -

 

[cheri222]

Ok you said it, I hide!!! Gave me my smile for the day. Thanks

 

[oesdog]

I am kinda finding it all a wee bit hard right now. Danny is off adult centre for two weeks and it is awful not having that rest -bite. He wont sleep at night and we are trying to get things ready for our daughters new baby and my other son seems to need endless support right now as the brain injury team are sorting suppervised work placements for him. I am soooo tired the eyes are actually burning in my sockets! DH is still really poorly since the heart op and I don;t like him doing too much at all so I try to do a lot of the heavey tasks while he isn;t looking! I have a blinding headache tonight and I can;t seem to relax? Thank God Danny goes back to adult centre Monday - but Dottys date for inducement for Baby is Monday - Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Then the following Monday I have to see a specialist about my arthritis as I am very sore and stiff again - well I wouldn;t think stress has anything to do with that at all! -

This is just a rant

For all the other caregivers out there - AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok I can stop now!

On the up side i have nearly completed all the baby outfits and cot blankets I have been making - will have to take photos and put them on a hobby thread! Of course I will also get some photos of the new baby modeling them!

Oesdog -

 

[TyrannosaurusChix]

you have a lot to deal with.. your bones must be made of iron, woman!

 

[oesdog]

No thay are not and today I just want to cry -

It is really hard work and I think I have changed and showered Danny at least 9 times in the last 12 hrs! He never stops rocking and is always always wanting music soooooooo load! He found the volume so were putting a new system in that is high up out of his reach! He loves gospel music - DH and I often say if they have music constantly in Heaven were asking God for ear plugs!

Its a really hard few weeks!
Thanks for caring!

Oesdog

 

[WingingIt]

Quote:
Maybe the next time you have a checkup for Danny you can ask his doctor about melatonin. I have two friends who have SN children (younger than Danny) that have been told by their doctors to give them small doses to help them sleep. It's supposed to be natural (I've never used it, so I'm not pushing it, please check with the doctor) but it might be something to help him and you both get some sleep.

 

[oesdog]

Quote:
Maybe the next time you have a checkup for Danny you can ask his doctor about melatonin. I have two friends who have SN children (younger than Danny) that have been told by their doctors to give them small doses to help them sleep. It's supposed to be natural (I've never used it, so I'm not pushing it, please check with the doctor) but it might be something to help him and you both get some sleep.

Thanks but we already use it and it doesn;t work!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We are reluctant to give him other stuff as we don;t want to go back to the days were he was bombed out of his skull and had no learning and living quality!

Oesdog