ATTENTION ALL WRITERS! C'MON!!!

Clucky3255: Like Miss Heny, your story isn't really in a genre I fully appreciate. But I'd say it has potential. :)

As far as constructive criticism goes, I think the story's punctuation and capitalization could use a little fixing up, but that's all easily fixed. Other than that: take time to develop the characters, use every storytelling trope you want in moderation, and have fun.
 
Clucky3255: Like Miss Heny, your story isn't really in a genre I fully appreciate. But I'd say it has potential.
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As far as constructive criticism goes, I think the story's punctuation and capitalization could use a little fixing up, but that's all easily fixed. Other than that: take time to develop the characters, use every storytelling trope you want in moderation, and have fun.
Thank you. I have had numerous people say that and Think that I might just write A different story, due to many people saying that sort of thing. What kind of thing do you guys read? Because this is not the type of story I usually write.:0
 
The question is, is this the story you want to write? If it is,then you should definitely continue. And if it isn't, you can always come back and finish it later.
 
Alaya spun around slowly, the Dark Lord Balmone’s evil
shadows began to close in on her. She pointed her armed bow at everything, afraid that it might jump out at her. Her brown braid hung down her back, and beads of cold sweat appeared on her tan forehead. Desperate but completely helpless Alaya swung out an arm at the nearest Shadow, only for it to be grasped by a ugly scarred, black hand, it’s long fingers were covered with rotting flesh. She screamed and kicked furiously but the Shadows only laughed mercilessly at the poor girl. A noise was heard and all the Shadows stopped in their tracks. Alaya’s eyes looked heavenward and into the blue sky. “Lord! If you are up there! Let that be my rescuer!” She opened her mouth but nothing but a groan came out.
The Shadow released her arm and slammed is putrid hands over their ears, or what seemed to be ears. Their body was cloaked in a black Shadowy veil, which hides all of their skeletal bodies from human sight, and leads to their name. The Shadows. Bewildered by The Shadows action she looked around her. All of the evil Shadows were doing the same. As if something horrible was hurting their ears; not only their ears. They were on the ground writhing with pain, that surged through their scarred body. A sweet sound, like singing, reached her ears. A crystalline clear voice floated through the cloudless sky as if from the heavens. No figure of any sort was revealed to her eyes, but Alaya did not take any chances. This was God’s message to her. She had to escape the clutches of these Shadows….now. She flung her brown braid behind her once more and jumped Shadow after Shadow. The did not seem to notice her as she stumbled and fell on top of them. With Each leap she sent up a prayer of thanks.



Does anybody like this kind of stuff?
I am just trying to please the crowd! LOL This is the type of stuff I usually write.:)
 
This story is definitely more in my area of expertise. Action/fantasy/scifi type stuff is something I've always enjoyed. :) I'm not so crazy about religion-y stuff, but it's not something I'm dead set against reading either.
 
Heres the most randomness story I have ever wrote XD


Once upon a time their was a potato. The potato loved to eat giant boats. One day the Potato saw a kitten and said,
“Hey! Are you a Derp?”
The kitten answered,
“No! I am a Herp Derp! Good day Mr!”
“Where are you going? Also I am a Mrs!”
The kitten turned around and hugged the potato,
“Thank you…”
The potato was happy to help. So he walked off and found a car,
“Hi car, do you eat people?!”
The car didn’t say anything, so the potato looked at it,
“Oh I understand, OK Calm down! Calm down! I will help!”
The potato jumped and then said,
“Their, now you can sing again!”
With that, the potato walked off. He ran over to the beach and saw a seagull,
“Hi! Do you wanna dance with me?”
The seagull went to the ground and started to die,
“Baby! Baby! Baby, Oh like, Baby! Baby! Baby, Oh!”
The potato said,
“Aww that’s sweet! You got the moves like Jagger!”
So the potato jumped into the ocean. In the ocean the potato found a person,
“Hi person! You seem to be happy, why?”
The person said,
“Bleky blah bleh bleck!”
“Really I thought it was a blanket? Wow! I am not too far off.”
“Yep! Thanks for helping super cheese!”
And the person fell under the waves and disapered. The potato found land and said,
“Well I can rest here while my best friend Jimmy goes and hits my mom with a lamp.”
The potato jumped into a tree and said,
“Block go bye…”
With that, the potato died.
 

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