I have a pair of 2 year old golden Italians and the female is definitely the boss! She will chase him around and peck at the back of his head if she doesn't want to be mated, and she always eats first. She even scalped him when I set up a pen with new birds coming into maturity next door to them. I don't know of I set off her territorial issues or if she just wanted a new, younger mate
I think quail just need a lot more time to get used to people, the older they are, the more of a relationship I've been able to build. When I bring this pair some greens they make cute little chittering noises and the female shakes her tail feathers while she eats, it's freaking adorable. Neither mind being held or petted, I managed to hatch out two chicks from them in this past couple months, fertility has declined rapidly, and I never thought I'd be retiring any quail to pet status, but I think we will. We started out mainly for meat and eggs, but I have focused on breeding for temperament for the past few years, mostly focusing on calm, quiet birds (all my boys have very quiet calls now). Just getting into colors and understanding genetics now too.