Daughter broke up with boyfriend and I'm the one depressed!

[connie1966]

How's everyone lately? I'm better I guess, less depressed less crying still think of him And miss him though , always will , but that hello from him gave me life back , I guess the thought of him hating me was killing me ..

 

[feelinglost]

I'm still mourning 5 months later I'm having a hard time accepting he won't be in my life anymore he cut all contact , which is a good thing for him but not for me, I guess I need closure too, maybe I need for him to tell me I'm ok .. I miss him everyday I'm a single mom the type that has no life always focused on my daughter that's it so I was always here with them so he was my friend my brother and my son , it sucks because he was one of the good ones she didn't leave him because of conflict or anything she just felt she was too young wants to live a bit travel experience life so it's harder to accept, I know she will regret it one day in the future to be loved and respected like that will be hard to find these days.

 

[feelinglost]

My daughter recently broke up with her boyfriend right after leaving for college. This has been so hard I feel I lost a daughter and a son. He was so good to her and our whole family loved him. We cared for him like our own. We had him on our phone plan among other things. I know they were young but I seen a future with them. My daughter hasn't said much at all about the break up and he now says he doesn't want to ever talk or be around her again. I know he is heart broken and he loved being with our family for everything. How long does this take to get over. I cry every day! I miss my daughter and him and she doesn't understand.

 

[connie1966]

I know she doesn't get it either, it depends it took me three years to stop crying ! Even though I do once in a while but not like before I was consumed with greif! It's not easy just take it day by day

 

[feelinglost]

I know she doesn't get it either, it depends it took me three years to stop crying ! Even though I do once in a while but not like before I was consumed with greif! It's not easy just take it day by day

 

[feelinglost]

...

[/quote. None of my friends understand at all. I know he is going through so much at home and I don't know what to do. I don't want to text him and upset him more. My daughter came home from college and confronted him about him hacking into her email and social media accounts and he turned so angery and I know he was just looking for answers and my daughter doesn't understand and gets mad if I say or ask what happens. I feel so out of control. We were on vacation one year ago with him and pictures keep coming up on my time hop. It kills me every time. This kid had done so many firsts with our family. I don't know if I can ever be ok with a new boy again nor do I want to be ok with a new one.

 

[connie1966]

Oh trust me I know!! I will never be ok with any boy after him , one thong I can tell you don't let this strain your relationship with your daughter that's one thing I regret we are just now starting to get along but it will not be like it use to for either of us a lot of damage was done a lot of resentment , I know it's hard but just pretend your ok in front of her don't mention him at all and support her, my daughter throws it in my face she is hurt by my reaction , I told her I'm sorry I was hurt Abd it affected me a lot she needs to try to understand, but then I think I'm the parent my job is to support my daughter my feelings are irrelevant , what's done is done I can't change it , you need to let go and whatever happens happens trust me I went through a bad depression I only hurt myself they both moved on more or less I know he still loves her but he is moving forward , if it's meant to be it will be, take care of you and your daughter and don't text him your daughter will lose it if she finds out, Abd you will be either bringing him backward it giving him false hope , you need to stay out of it, go through your mourning in private. , try to stay busy

 

[feelinglost]

Oh trust me I know!! I will never be ok with any boy after him , one thong I can tell you don't let this strain your relationship with your daughter that's one thing I regret we are just now starting to get along but it will not be like it use to for either of us a lot of damage was done a lot of resentment , I know it's hard but just pretend your ok in front of her don't mention him at all and support her, my daughter throws it in my face she is hurt by my reaction , I told her I'm sorry I was hurt Abd it affected me a lot she needs to try to understand, but then I think I'm the parent my job is to support my daughter my feelings are irrelevant , what's done is done I can't change it , you need to let go and whatever happens happens trust me I went through a bad depression I only hurt myself they both moved on more or less I know he still loves her but he is moving forward , if it's meant to be it will be, take care of you and your daughter and don't text him your daughter will lose it if she finds out, Abd you will be either bringing him backward it giving him false hope , you need to stay out of it, go through your mourning in private. , try to stay busy

. Thank you! I am trying to support her. It's not easy. Has your daughter brought anyone else into her life? My sister is taking this hard as well when we would go and visit her he came would go with us and stay her kids are attached to him and keep asking about him. She says no one else will ever be allowed back until she is married. It has been so hard. I am glad I'm not the only one that feels this way. I thought I was losing my mind.

 

[connie1966]

Yes she found a new boyfriend after 4 months ! That killed me also I lost it on her! She barely brings him over , iv seen him a handful of times Abd just small talk hi how are you Abd bye really I'm not really interested my
daughter is not interested in us having a relationship either And I don't think he is either , it's sad that she doesn't share that part of her life but it is what it is, your not crazy we took care of them fed them loved them spent so much time with them they became family you can't just unlove someone ,we are moms and we loved them as mins we worry about them the thought of him heartbroken killed me I miss talking to him hearing his voice seeing his beautiful smile and the hugs! The love he loved me too we were family I was a big part of his life Abd he lost her and me poor baby I hope he meets someone soon apparently he's not interested yet in starting a relationship , I know it's hard to support her trust me ! But fake it cause it will only push her away more And hurt her feelings

 

[feelinglost]

Yes she found a new boyfriend after 4 months ! That killed me also I lost it on her! She barely brings him over , iv seen him a handful of times Abd just small talk hi how are you Abd bye really I'm not really interested my
daughter is not interested in us having a relationship either And I don't think he is either , it's sad that she doesn't share that part of her life but it is what it is, your not crazy we took care of them fed them loved them spent so much time with them they became family you can't just unlove someone ,we are moms and we loved them as mins we worry about them the thought of him heartbroken killed me I miss talking to him hearing his voice seeing his beautiful smile and the hugs! The love he loved me too we were family I was a big part of his life Abd he lost her and me poor baby I hope he meets someone soon apparently he's not interested yet in starting a relationship , I know it's hard to support her trust me ! But fake it cause it will only push her away more And hurt her feelings

I know exactly how you feel. I just want to tell him she will regret this and everything will be back to how it was but I don't think she ever will regret it. She doesn't miss him at all and doesn't seem to care and when I asked if she was concerned about all he is going through she asked if I was blaming her for it. He doesn't have a mom in his life and he has had to grow up at a young age and I just wanted to take care of him so he wouldn't have to worry. He even talked about moving in with us in a month or 2. He went from having no support to our entire family to support him. We had him his first birthday party he has ever had. My parents took him in as a grandchild even. This sure has helped though being able to talk to someone that understands how I am feeling. I know I don't want my relationship with my daughter to suffer though.