Explaining Chicken Math

[sepaditty1]

When I was a kid I caught my sister & her friends smoking. She didn't want me to tell so what did she do? Gave me one too!

All you have to do is get your hubby addicted too! Mine is getting in just as deep as I am and we may just have to build another run.

 

[potagergirl]

Dearest Lord,
Before I explain my failure to be good and follow my wonderful loving hubbies orders I wish to point out that you did create
me in your image. I can only imagine how much you love chickens as you are the one that created them. So in light of that
you of all people should understand the chicken math I am about to present.
As you know I ordered the chickens hubby wanted white crested black polish and because they are not all hens also the fact
that a minimum order of 15 is required I had no choice but to order 10 instead of 5.
Then as I said the minimum order is 15 I had to order 5 more chickens thus I added 5 splash cochin standard bringing the required total to 15.
I have followed posts with chicks showing up weak the poor little things have even past to visit you.
Thus my brain (which you created to be prepared for anything) thought about those lonely 5 splash cochin. What if a couple are ill? What if the hens meet demise and I am left with roosters? What if this heat wave causes any problems for those 5 lonely little splash cochin? What if later in the summer they are free ranging and a hawk takes one away?
By now you see my dilemma.
Due to all my what if's (my brain conjured you know the one you gave me) I called Cackle and had 5 more splash cochin added to my order.
I know what your going to say, hubby told me I could only have 5 white crested but the circumstances are just out of my control.
Please show hubby the light and let him know you do not fault me (beings you made me and all). I know it will be a surprise when he counts 10 white crested and notices the other 10 he don't know about look completely different and that they aren't supposed to be in the order. It's only 20 chickens and 20 is not that far off of 5. So even though I acted knowing I would have to ask forgiveness after wards just remember you made me with free will and its easier to ask for forgiveness after the fact because I just didn't do it before the fact!
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Dear potagergirl,
I created chicken math and how it works, who do you think put the if's in your head???......all is forgiven.
THE LORD
P.S. Now about that Coca Cola addiction you have...................

 

[LPeaslee]

Look at it this way, when I ordered chicks several months ago I received 7 packing peanuts, the variety of which I did not have a say. So you simply took a preemptive action and selected the breed of your preference.
Also because the hatchery selected my peanuts, they were all males and I had no choice but to get rid of them, thus breaking up the small family of chickens that I was now responsible for their well being. You on the other hand with your wisdom, have a good chance of not needing to put your chicken family through that type of painful sepperation.

God will bless you for your kindness.

 

[flyladyrocks]

Lord help me, there are free chicks listed on Craiglist. How many can I get without hubby noticing?

You see I was good and got 6 chicks, hubbie said 5-6 chickens this year. So since they are just chicks, and not laying then I really have NO chickens right?

So how many chicks make the equivalent of one chicken - at least 6, so then I figure could get another 30 chicks right?

I live in a city with NO restrictions on flock size (woohoo!).

 

[sepaditty1]

I'm pretty sure free ones don't count.

 

[potagergirl]

I agree free chickens don't count.

 

[flyladyrocks]

Totally makes sense - free ones don't count - Yipee!

 

[afarhat8]

flyladyrocks, potagergirl, and sepaditty1: i think that free ones count as minus 1 each. this is because you didn't deliberately get them, they were foisted upon you, so you don't have to add them to the number of chickens you have. but they're there, so you have to acknowledge them somehow. subtracting 1 for each freebee from the total is therefore only logical.

 

[potagergirl]

 

[Anigozanthos]

I love this thread, I have been sitting and laughing half the morning. I am absolutely going to show it to my DH to show him how restrained I've actually been

You see, we started with three eggs in a little incubator as an experiment for the children. Only one egg hatched and you can't have just one chick in the brooder so we got two more chicks to keep it company.

Two turned out to be roosters and while we were swapping them for two pullets, we were offered three more eggs. Two hatched but one died and you can't have just one chick in the brooder so we got another chick to keep it company.

Meanwhile one of the 'pullets' we gained in the rooster swap started crowing and back he went. That's when we said four is enough. Sadly, the chick we hatched (a beautiful little Welsummer pullet) had an unfortunate accident. The chick we bought to keep her company was now lonely and (say it all together with me) you can't have just one chick in the brooder!

This is only my first six months of chicken ownership, who knows what chicken math will spring up in the future!