Feeling really guilty right now

[Xtina]

I just wanted to remind people to keep it respectful before it turned into one of those arguments about the topic.

 

[sianara]

Quote:
I remember thinking of a five hour stretch of solid sleep as "sleeping through the night". As far as I was concerned, it was!

 

[Xtina]

Demetri's sleep just gets worse and worse. He spends more time in my bed every night because there's no amount of crying it out that will get him to fall asleep in his crib, nor will he allow me to put him down if I try rocking him to sleep. I don't know what to do about it. It's so uncomfortable having him in my bed. I hate it. I just want him to find comfort in his own crib. I'm venting here, but I'm tired of "methods." There's the ferber method, the cry it out method, the Sears method, the no cry sleep solution method...a million methods that you have to buy the book and spend time reading it, and no suggestion that tells me how to make him comfortable in his own bed. Just wanted a place where I could say that.

 

[mom'sfolly]

I wish I had a good suggestion. For me, baby #2 sleep through the night at 4-6 weeks, baby one was 4-6 months. They both slept in our room in a bassinet until they were at least 4 months old, it may have been longer. The first one had an amazing appetite, and still eats a huge amount and is nocturnal. He's now twelve and a half, 5'6 1/2", and 125 pounds. If allowed he will be up to 11-midnight and sleep to 11 am. The younger needed less food and slept better. Now, at nine, he sleeps so deeply he has bedwetting issues and has a BMI of 5. He rarely sleeps past 7:30, no matter how late his night.

It is so hard when you are sleep deprived and you have this person who for no rational reason is unhappy. I wish you the best. The only other suggestion I have that might work for you is one of those bed add-ons that gives the baby their own space, but still allows for co-sleeping.

 

[Xtina]

Thanks for the empathy. I've been resisting the co-sleeper, but I may have to break down and do it. Right now, I'm researching sleep aids. These all seem like last-ditch efforts and scams designed to get money from desperate parents.

 

[Sonoran Silkies]

Several ideas;

First, you do not have to choose a single method; put together a combination of things that works for your family. If a person does not live in your household, then their opinion is irrelevant.

Try getting a toddler or regular bed for your child rather than a crib. You can put us side rails to prevent falling out, or simply line the floor with pillows. Lay down there with your baby and once asleep, you can probably get up.

Try putting a bed or mattress in your room, either immediately adjacent to your bed or separated, or remove one side of the crib and place it adjacent to your bed.

Bring the child to bed, or tell him that he can come to your bed on his own (if crawling or walking) when/if he wakes up.

Try to remember that they are only little for a very short while.

 

[Xtina]

Great ideas, thank you. I've often thought that if I could just get into that crib with him for a while the problem would clear up. But it's not a drop-side crib and they're even trying to make those illegal after the recall this year.

 

[newfoundland]

Don't despair, I'm sure most mums know what you're going through but it does get easier. Don't do anything that you are uncomfortable with or upsets you. Babies catch on to tension very quickly and will 'wind themselves up' when they sense it is bedtime. Get as much sleep as you can when the little chap is asleep. I really don't think you can keep a sleepy child awake when he needs a daytime sleep and not make him miserable and over tired. 6 months is very young and I think he certainly needs those daytime sleeps. Don't lose confidence in yourself. We were all first time mums once. It's my opinion that night time sleep will come as he develops. Try the usual bath, bottle/breast and bed. Keep his sleeping area dark and quiet. If he has had fresh air exercise and has a full tummy, he is neither too hot or cold, he should fall asleep. If he wakes after only a couple of hours try going into him and just rubbing his back gently while soothing him. He may just awake and wonder where you are. I don't think it is unusual for a 6 month old to need a night feed still, you could try giving him one night time feed, and just soothe him at other wakeful times. Trust me, you will look back one day and wonder where the years went. My best advice is enjoy!