For all of you with mr wonderfulls..

[luvmychicknkids]

Again, no offense was meant towards anyone. I value honesty but
sometimes come off wrong or am brutal about it. Just ask my poor
wife.

Honestly (I think I am about to get myself in trouble here LOL) I think that is a very male trait!!!! LOL That is one of my wonderful hubby's BIGGEST flaws. He swears he never means to be brutal and hurtful but boy can it feel that way sometimes.

I tell him it is alright.....he is just reverting to his caveman ways.

 

[PurpleChicken]

Quote:
No offense taken.

My first marriage lasted 20 years. Only because I was not willing to leave when I knew it was over. There was no screaming or fighting so it was too easy to just stay... I have been with DH for 15 years now.
This is my 2nd marriage and my DH's 3rd...it is both of our LAST marriages!!! I told him there might be a death (remember we own a crematory) but there will be NO divorce!!! lol
I love him dearly and I think he feels the same way. I am NOT happy with him 100% of the time nor is he with me but I would not trade him for any other man on earth .
The best things about him are:
He is a hard worker
He makes me laugh
He listens to me
He would rather be with me than away from me

Excellent post!

You have been on all sides of it so you really understand.

Those 4 things you posted about him are all things all us men should
strive to be. That is really sweet.

 

[PurpleChicken]

Quote:
Honestly (I think I am about to get myself in trouble here LOL) I think that is a very male trait!!!! LOL That is one of my wonderful hubby's BIGGEST flaws. He swears he never means to be brutal and hurtful but boy can it feel that way sometimes.

I tell him it is alright.....he is just reverting to his caveman ways.

Yeah, it is a male trait.

You would be surprised how hard some
of us have to work at being nice. oo ahhh ah oo oo (Caveman speak)

 

[luvmychicknkids]

Quote:
Honestly (I think I am about to get myself in trouble here LOL) I think that is a very male trait!!!! LOL That is one of my wonderful hubby's BIGGEST flaws. He swears he never means to be brutal and hurtful but boy can it feel that way sometimes.

I tell him it is alright.....he is just reverting to his caveman ways.

Yeah, it is a male trait.

You would be surprised how hard some
of us have to work at being nice. oo ahhh ah oo oo (Caveman speak)

YES....and I could just picture you pounding your chest as you said (ummmmm....grunted?) that!!! LOL

 

[LilRalphieRoosmama]

We aren't married...yet...but I found my Mr. Wonderful when I gave up trying. Like others that have posted, I stopped focusing on TRYING and focused on learning more about myself and becoming happy with who I was. I was married for 13 years and have two wonderful children, but I learned that when you're young you don't know what you want or who you are because you're too busy taking care of everybody else.

The old saying "love comes to those who wait" can't be more true. I knew the first time I met him over two years ago that he was the only one for me, and he is truly my best friend.

The only advice I can give is that nobody is perfect and neither are you. It's all about compromise - you have to learn when to give and when to take. Look at what's inside and not what's outside because that's where it counts.

 

[luvarabhorses]

I learned a lot from my Grandmother who passed away at 96 a few months ago. She and her 8 sisters all married and not one divorced. She was born near Mountain City Tennessee, dirt poor and stayed fairly poor most of her life. Options for women then were very few. You got married and had kids, had kids. My Grandfather was a hard worker but evidently pretty fixed on women's roles. She mostly nodded her head and went along with everything. The only big argument my Dad told me about was when he bought a $600 hunting dog. He left her for long periods of time with the four surviving kids and no money while he herded sheep. She was a master vegetable gardener, livestock butcher etc...
My other Grandmother was the opposite. They worked hard together in a construction business where she drove a dump truck and could run a dozer etc... This started in the 40's and they were married 55 years until he passed. People have told me my Grandfather, Curley Reynolds, was the closest thing Cecil County ever had to a saint. He was the kindest most considerate person you would ever hope to meet.
I am wired way more like the second described Grandmom. I have a lot of opinions, lots of ideas. I can't believe, finally, I met a man like Pop Pop Reynolds. Yesterday he helped me make the following picture for my idea of reflecting light and giving my garden a jump start. It's out of a discarded satellite dish left on the property. The turtles need to look for turtles idea was great.
My marriage of almost 20 years ended last year. It had a lot of good times but it was hard! This is easy.
Lisa

also: Mr Frizzle =isn't he cute?

 

[klf73]

I am 100% happy NOW, it took a LOT of work to get here on both our parts

. I have been with dh for 14 years, married 12. We have always had a friendship in our relationship, even when we fought. We are alike in enough ways, but yet different enough to keep it interesting

 

[random]

wow...seems to me in the end ur all saying the same thing...really...re read some stuff guys...my partner annoys me to tears! but i know i do too...and if hes really bothering me and i think "id be better off alone i cant wait for him to go to work!" by the time hes reaching for the door handle to go to work im missing him already so i throw the being alone thing out the window...then if i ever think...surly theres better i remember that we all have flaws and the next guys flaws will prolly be worse! and the things that bug me really arent that big...then i remember im pregnant and hormonal and hes actually dealing with more then me...i.e being a provider, a father, a husband, a counselor to me, in fact our entire backbone! and i think...hmm ok, ill let him be crabby... he doesnt drink, take drugs, isnt abusive, comes home, is loyal...so what if hes snappy...i dont think ive been too good lately...which reminds me...i might go do something special for when he comes home to say thanks!....
the best book ive ever read that always puts things in perspective is called the crimson thread...it helped me with being a mum, a partner and a christian! its an oldish book so dunno if it can be found...but thats my smack in the face when im gettin too naggy...love the cave man guy though...men r brutal...ur ment to be! we r the soft ones that say the nice things...my partner is REALLY brutal...but i love it....love the manliness...only prob with that is it has great highs and lows too! but im sure guys prolly think the same of women!

 

[Quail_Antwerp]

To the OP, I am not sure what has you concerned, or what you are looking for, but please allow me to share this.

We've been married going on 11 years now, together going on 13. It has NOT been easy. We didn't fight when we dated ever. BUT the first two years of our marraige we fought like cats and dogs. I loved when he left for work in the morning, dreaded when he came home

This is why in my earlier post I said it took a lot of work! On both ends!

We were two people who were adjusting to living together, learning eachothers quirks, etc...and we had a baby that first year...there were other stresses and things outside of our marraige that added to the problems.

Fast forward a few years. We managed to work out the kinks (ok, I grew up! I was 19 when we got married, he was 27!) My DH worked a full time job and I got to stay home with the kids. One day, he hurts his back, ruptures several discs in his back. He's unable to move for 2 days!! This is April 2005 and I am 3 weeks away from delivering our fourth baby!! DH hasn't worked in 3 years.

That first month was WONDERFUL! We went from not seeing eachother (he had been working 12 hour shifts. Left before the kids woke up, got home after they went to bed) to seeing eachother ALL DAY! The first month was wonderful. After a month, I was soooooo ready for him to go back to work! We had to get used to eachother all over again!!

Fast forward to now, 3 almost 4 years later...I can't imagine NOT having my husband home with me everyday! He is still struggling with his back, and now is on bed rest per dr. orders until he has back surgery. Back in November, after he had been denied his Disability for the 3rd time, he told his dr he was just going to try to work a job. He got hired by a tree farm.

First day of work arrives. We were soooo excited. It was like two kids at Christmas! I got up, packed his lunch, fixed him a special breakfast, had morning coffee with him, kissed him goodbye, and cried when he left. It was the worst and longest day EVER! The kids asked me all day long, "Mom, when will daddy be home." That job only lasted 3 weeks and then the company laid off everyone. DH was already feeling more pain in his back from the job, so really he welcomed the lay off. I welcomed the lay off because I finally had my husband back with me, at home.

It really feels like someone is ripping our hearts out when we are apart. We both cry if we are separated from eachother too long because it physically hurts us to be apart. He is my best friend. I can't imagine my life without him.

I have no better way to explain it except to say, you know how when you first become enammered with someone? Your heart skips, you have butterflies in your stomach? you can't wait until the next time you get to see them? That excitement you feel over "new" love? Or that first kiss? Yea...It's like that here everyday!

Perfect? Goodness no! We are only humans, after all, but I would say we are perfectly matched!

 

[luvmychicknkids]

Quote:
That was beautiful. Made me all drippy eyed.