Forgiveness

[chickened]

Forgiving also opens the door to healing.

 

[aoxa]

Quote:
Anger will make you bitter.

Any therapist will tell you it's much healthier to forgive. This does not mean you have to forget. This does not mean you have to try again by trusting them. Everyone deserves a second chance. 20 years can really change a person.

20 years of anger can really age you as well.

 

[CheerioLounge]

Forgiveness is all about making you feel better. Not the person you are forgiving. In the long run, forgiving is the way to go.

 

[TinyChickenLady]

In practical terms, it may be necessary for the offender to offer some form of acknowledgment, apology or restitution, or even just ask for forgiveness, in order for the wronged person to believe himself

I guess the way I feel about it is that forgiveness shouldn't just be granted. It should be earned, like trust and respect.

I would not be able to forgive the aunt. I could easily forget she exists, which is what I do with people who no longer deserve my respect, but can't forgive.

A man nearly killed me in a car crash and showed absolutely no remorse about it. I won't forgive him. I also won't acknowledge his existence.

My grandmother hit me. I don't forgive her, but I tolerate her because I have to.

If an aunt stole from me what I had earned, according to the deceased relative, I wouldn't forgive her either until she could show remorse, apologize and work on paying me back.

Do I think you should forgive? No.
But I do think you should be able to live your life without her stuck in the back of your mind. Get rid of her, forget her and just assume she's dead.
Harsh, but helpful.​

 

[Avalon1984]

Quote:
I guess the way I feel about it is that forgiveness shouldn't just be granted. It should be earned, like trust and respect.

I would not be able to forgive the aunt. I could easily forget she exists, which is what I do with people who no longer deserve my respect, but can't forgive.

A man nearly killed me in a car crash and showed absolutely no remorse about it. I won't forgive him. I also won't acknowledge his existence.

My grandmother hit me. I don't forgive her, but I tolerate her because I have to.

If an aunt stole from me what I had earned, according to the deceased relative, I wouldn't forgive her either until she could show remorse, apologize and work on paying me back.

Do I think you should forgive? No.
But I do think you should be able to live your life without her stuck in the back of your mind. Get rid of her, forget her and just assume she's dead.
Harsh, but helpful.

Yup, same way here.