Granny's gone and done it again

[rIrs roost]

I had grits for breakfast. With a big spoon of minced garlic, for this cold.

hope you feel better soon camping. Bad stuff is going around. Pearl is sick and now im stopped up.

 

[campingshaws]

hope you feel better soon camping. Bad stuff is going around. Pearl is sick and now im stopped up.

to y'all. I guess it's all this rain?

 

[Wishing4Wings]

Im on a cell. It use to take me back to where I left off too. Ive hit just about every alert and still cant find it.

Oh.. on the computer, when you choose Forums from the top brown bar, a menu comes up just below it and I can choose Watched Threads there. The alerts seem to be hit and miss. I use them occasionally for a shortcut, but like the Watched Threads better. (It only shows ones that have unread posts, unless you scroll down and choose Show All)
Hope you and Pearl get better soon.

 

[rIrs roost]

to y'all. I guess it's all this rain?

I think you're right. Started here last night and hasn't let since. Had to check on the fluff butt this morning and of course all the chickens run out. All but the silkie found a dry spot. Now he looks like a wet mop. Poor pitiful little dumb roo thinks hes a duck

 

[rIrs roost]

Oh.. on the computer, when you choose Forums from the top brown bar, a menu comes up just below it and I can choose Watched Threads there. The alerts seem to be hit and miss. I use them occasionally for a shortcut, but like the Watched Threads better. (It only shows ones that have unread posts, unless you scroll down and choose Show All)
Hope you and Pearl get better soon.

Thanks. Maybe I can find it on my cell.

 

[Granny Hatchet]

mornings, didnt sleep for crap last night. pain is some better, localized I guess.
Missed Twist again.

 

[Granny Hatchet]

I am in a mood, so it is best if I get off the computer and knit for a few days. People are irking me today and I hate to snap on somebody here.

 

[Granny Hatchet]

Red, I go to alerts and the first one takes me to where I left off.

 

[Granny Hatchet]

LOL Reds on page ONE . He might be a while.

 

[rIrs roost]

WE MISS RODNEY DANGERFIELD


With my old man I got no respect. I asked him, "How
can I get my kite in the air?" He told me to run off a cliff.

I went to a massage parlor. It was self-service.

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog
on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass!

Last night my wife met me at the front door.
She was wearing a sexy negligee. The only
trouble was, she was coming home.

A girl phoned me and said, 'Come on over. There's
nobody home.' I went over. Nobody was home!

A hooker once told me she had a headache.

I was making love to this girl and she started
crying. I said, 'Are you going to hate yourself in
the morning?' She said, 'No, I hate myself now.'

My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental
floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves.

I'm so ugly I stuck my head out the
window and got arrested for mooning.

The other day I came home early and a guy
was jogging, naked. I asked him, 'Why?'
He said, 'Because you came home early.'

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer.

I know I'm not sexy. When I put my underwear on
I can hear the Fruit-of-the-Loom guys giggling.

My wife is such a bad cook.
In my house we pray after the meal.
My wife likes to talk to me during sex;
last night she called me from a hotel.

It's been a rough day. I got up this morning
and put a shirt on and a button fell off. I picked
up my briefcase, and the handle came off.
I'm afraid to go to the bathroom.

I was such an ugly kid! When I played in
the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.

I could tell my parents hated me.
My bath toys were a toaster and radio.

I'm so ugly my father carried around a
picture of the kid that came with his wallet.

When I was born, the doctor came into the waiting
room and said to my father, "I'm sorry. We did every
thing we could, but he pulled through anyway."

I'm so ugly my mother had morning
sickness AFTER I was born.

I remember the time that I was kidnapped and
they sent a piece of my finger to my father.
He said he wanted more proof.

Once when I was lost, I saw a policeman, & asked
him to help me find my parents. I said to him, "Do
you think we'll ever find them?" He said, "I don't
know kid. There's so many places they can hide."

My wife made me join a bridge club.
I jump off next Tuesday.

I'm so ugly, I once worked in a pet shop,
and people kept asking how big I'd get.

I went to see my doctor. "Doctor, every morning
when I get up and I look in the mirror I feel
like throwing up. What's wrong with me?"
He said: "Nothing, your eyesight is perfect."

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed
a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me
to have a few drinks and get some rest.

One year they wanted to make me
a poster boy -- for birth control.

My uncle's dying wish was to have me
sitting in his lap; he was in the electric chair

omg twisted I just found this at the beginning of the thread. Thank God I was on the toilet or I would have definitely soiled myself lol. Love Rodney.