Quote: That's what I said. You can only do what you can do. We can all give our opinions and advice, but you are the one walking in your shoes.
When I found Frank, I was 25 and just starting my first teaching job. I found him at night on the way for a weekend back home, and ran out into the middle of a dark busy 4 lane highway to rescue him. My only chicken experience at the time was the farm chickens we had when I was a kid that we never ate. All the extra cockerels were given to the neighbor who ate them. I watched them get killed and cleaned and didn't have any trouble with the idea of it, just had trouble with the killing. The only thing I had ever killed intentionally as a kid was a lizard that got half run over on the road, but was still alive. Its back end was squashed and it was stuck to the road, but the front end was frantically and futilely trying to scramble for cover. I smashed it with a rock to finish what the car had started, but was yelling and crying the whole time. I can still feel the rock and how loud I was yelling. That memory never has left me.
I took Frank back to live with me. He lived in a barn stall on the property where I rented a cottage. I intended to keep him as a pet and maybe eventually get a few hens for him. Didn't know what I was getting into. The other important part of the story is, that at that time in my life, I did not eat any meat. At all. For several years. Not for any other reason than I just chose not to. It wasn't a big deal and I didn't talk about it. Easy to do when you live alone. So at that time, killing him had to go to someone else, and I never even considered eating him because there was no chicken on my menu! If someone had offered to do him in and eat him, I would have jumped at the chance. Waste not, want not.
Oh, and my vegetarian days ended when a neighbor brought back some fresh salmon from the Klamath River. So fresh, they were still wiggling! He gave several huge fillets, and I devoured them in an embarrassingly short time. From there it was a slippery slope back to the land of the carnivores!
We all walk our own path, sometimes with friends, sometimes not, but we alone make our choices. Which path you choose is up to you, and if you make the best decision you can at the forks in front of you, you should be at peace with your decisions. Do what you can. Do your best. No one can judge you more harshly than you will judge yourself.
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