I am a great cook! I think so anyway.
My Thanksgiving Turkey
I was killing a turkey for thanksgiving a few year back. I had 2 cement blokes with a tub of water sitting on the blocks and had a fire going under the tub. After I chop the birds head off I would dip him into the hot water, witch would allow the feathers to be pulled out easy.
I start out wearing shorts and sandals, I grab the bird by his feet, I chop off his head and he starts flapping his big wings and beating me with them, So, I drop the big bird and he is flopping around & flops right under the tub and into the fire.
Hes still flapping his wings and throwing red-hot coals all over my legs and feet & the yard.
Now fires are starting all over the yard [because the grass is dry.(Fall)] I cant get to the bird the yard has got about 10 small fires that are rapidly growing into larger fires.
The people that live next door think my house is on fire and call the fire department. By the time the fire truck get to my house Im standing there in the mist of a blacken burnt yard holding the water hose in one hand and a blacken turkey in the other hand. All the firemen had a good laugh that day.
This is true story about how I Deep fry a turkey / [husband]
In my home I have a very large fireplace 4foot wide x 4 foot high. One day I decide I would deep-fry a turkey breast in a 2 gal cast iron pot in my large fireplace. [My wife said, I dont think this is a good idea. I know what Im doing I proudly say.]
So! I place the frozen turkey into the pot, I add water from a pitcher and mark the pitcher so I will know how much oil to put into the pot with the bird so it will not overflow by just filling the pot with oil then adding the bird. [Im no dummy!].
The next day the bird is thawed out, I place the right amount of oil into the pot, and I place the pot in the fire to heat the oil. I have a wire run through the bird and I start to lower the bird into the [too] hot oil, it starts to boil over. When boom!
The oil burst into flames. Burning oil is all over the hearth; the flames are lapping up to the shelf over the fireplace. my kids come running from there rooms and are sitting at the top of the stairs watching the show and call out to my wife, who is in the kitchen.
Mom! Dads burning down the house. To witch my wife replies. I know, Ive all ready called the fire department.
. I put the lid on the pot; this puts out the oil burning. I grab the little shovel that is used to shovel ash and start shoveling ash onto the burning oil. This puts out the oil and allows me to shovel the oil into the ash bucket and get it outside. About this time the fire truck drives up and the driver says you again!
PS. No one got hurt in this mishap. And just some oil stains on the hearth to remind me never to do that again. [Not indoors at leas]
My Thanksgiving Turkey
I was killing a turkey for thanksgiving a few year back. I had 2 cement blokes with a tub of water sitting on the blocks and had a fire going under the tub. After I chop the birds head off I would dip him into the hot water, witch would allow the feathers to be pulled out easy.
I start out wearing shorts and sandals, I grab the bird by his feet, I chop off his head and he starts flapping his big wings and beating me with them, So, I drop the big bird and he is flopping around & flops right under the tub and into the fire.
Hes still flapping his wings and throwing red-hot coals all over my legs and feet & the yard.
Now fires are starting all over the yard [because the grass is dry.(Fall)] I cant get to the bird the yard has got about 10 small fires that are rapidly growing into larger fires.
The people that live next door think my house is on fire and call the fire department. By the time the fire truck get to my house Im standing there in the mist of a blacken burnt yard holding the water hose in one hand and a blacken turkey in the other hand. All the firemen had a good laugh that day.
This is true story about how I Deep fry a turkey / [husband]
In my home I have a very large fireplace 4foot wide x 4 foot high. One day I decide I would deep-fry a turkey breast in a 2 gal cast iron pot in my large fireplace. [My wife said, I dont think this is a good idea. I know what Im doing I proudly say.]
So! I place the frozen turkey into the pot, I add water from a pitcher and mark the pitcher so I will know how much oil to put into the pot with the bird so it will not overflow by just filling the pot with oil then adding the bird. [Im no dummy!].
The next day the bird is thawed out, I place the right amount of oil into the pot, and I place the pot in the fire to heat the oil. I have a wire run through the bird and I start to lower the bird into the [too] hot oil, it starts to boil over. When boom!
The oil burst into flames. Burning oil is all over the hearth; the flames are lapping up to the shelf over the fireplace. my kids come running from there rooms and are sitting at the top of the stairs watching the show and call out to my wife, who is in the kitchen.
Mom! Dads burning down the house. To witch my wife replies. I know, Ive all ready called the fire department.
. I put the lid on the pot; this puts out the oil burning. I grab the little shovel that is used to shovel ash and start shoveling ash onto the burning oil. This puts out the oil and allows me to shovel the oil into the ash bucket and get it outside. About this time the fire truck drives up and the driver says you again!
PS. No one got hurt in this mishap. And just some oil stains on the hearth to remind me never to do that again. [Not indoors at leas]
