How many hubbys or boyfriends...

[joebryant]

I should probably add this about Division of Labor. I have a large, well-maintained (by ME) home and 6 1/2 acre all planted for wildlife and maintained by ME. There's no way on this planet that I would EVER let my wife drive either the large farm Kubota tractor or the large Gravely mower. That being said, when I was young I never once said to myself, "Gee, wonder if I can somehow find a girl who's so beautiful to marry me and have my children even if she's all that and too good to know how to cook for the family meals, sew on a button or clothing repair, and a clue/interest in cleaning house."
I don't know why any girl would marry a guy who isn't trained in a money-making profession and the rudiments of lawn and home maintenance, and I don't know why any guy would marry a girl who doesn't know how and is willing to fix meals and maintain a home.

 

[OrpingtonManor]

I am not good with division of labor. I'm good with helping each other. Most of the time, problems can be solved by saying, "Can you grab a towel and dry if I wash?" DSO and I work well together, even to the point of each having a drill driver, one with the pilot hole bit, the other with the screw. This is supposed to be your friend, your love, not an adversary.

 

[joebryant]

It has nothing to do with being an adversary or not; it has to do with who has the primary responsibility for the jobs' getting done. If my wife asks me to do do something to help her, I do, but it's not MY job, and if it doesn't get done so be it. It's not my fault if the house ends up looking like a dump anymore than if the yard's looking like a trash dump would ever be her fault.

 

[Reinbeau]

Running a household (that's inside and out) isn't a 'job', it's a responsibility for everyone who lives there. I am perfectly capable of running any machine in the driveway or the garage, my husband is perfectly capable of it, too, as well as the washing machine and the dish washer. The jobs get done by the person who has the time to do them. As long as your wife is happy to be a 'housewife' then fine - but if she wants to mow that lawn a particular way, then she should be able, and capable, of doing it. I need to be able to run the snow blower, if my husband is at work, the driveway still needs to be cleared - I should make him work all day and then come home and snowblow the driveway? I don't think so. Hard divisions of labor are foreign to me.

 

[OrpingtonManor]

Quote:

you are my twin and I think I love you!

 

[joebryant]

Quote:
I'm not saying whether you should or you shouldn't. I'm saying that if the driveway never gets blown, it should be considered his fault, not yours.

 

[Hillsvale]

Mine loads and unloads the DW unless my oldest DS gets to it first. He is the king of laundry, pretty good at folding etc including my knickers..

though if he has worn something that can be worn the next day (weekend clothes) they lay on the floor

... he vacumns and washes floors (swiffer), paints, cleans ovens and does toilets. He is the taker outer of dogs at 5am, 7pm and 10pm, digger of holes and fencer of property, clearing of land dude and master of the REMOTE.... and makes the best curry ever

He brings me coffee in bed every day at 5:30 even if I groan at him to bugger off!

I am the main cook and do everythings from scratch (more so when I have my own meat) and we share most household chores but the heavier one's he mostly gets since I had spinal surgery (he repremands me if I lift stuff

)

What doesn't he do....?

I do the electrical wiring, new switches, thermostats etc.
I do the plumbing
I do the renovations and building
I am the inventor
I am the keeper of the bestest of workshops and all the toys ... errrr, tools going.

We can both do flooring...

And being a Brit... calls me doll. I love him...

 

[OrpingtonManor]

Quote:
I'm not saying whether you should or you shouldn't. I'm saying that if the driveway never gets blown, it should be considered his fault, not yours.

Fault over a snowblower? No thanks. Someone is exhausted, and the tag-team plan is fantastic!

ETA -- I realize that we will just have to agree to disagree. There is more than one way to do this. It's entirely up to the couple to negotiate for themselves.

 

[Mahonri]

Quote:
My thoughts exactly.

Other than wash I do LOTS OF HOUSEWORK.

 

[Hillsvale]

Quote: