husband being shipped out with marines

[sdtl07]

Hello. My husband is a contractor working in Iraq. He has been there for a year today. I know it is scary, especially with a baby on the way, but you have to find a way for yourself to relax. The stress is no good for the baby. My husband is able to call, email, IM, everyday. He lives on military bases so if your husband has a lap top he should be able to contact you regularly. Do you have family nearby? Maybe you could have someone come stay with you for a couple weeks when he goes, and then for a few weeks before the baby is due to be born. I knwo that you are scared that is normal, but you have to be strong, you knew he was a Marine when you married him, and that may even be part of what attracted you to him. So show him your support. This next suggestion may upset some of you but here is my opinion. Try not to lay too much at your husbands feet. Believe me he is just as worried scared nervous and anxious as you are, but he signed up for military duty and he neeeds to know that you will be ok at home while he is away. Vent to friends, relatives, websites, but try not to fall apart in front of him. Tell him your fears, tell him how much you will miss him, but always remind him that you will make it and you will keep things together while he is gone. It is very hard on them being so far away, they worry every day about bullets, bombs, and family. Especially their wives, he will hear many stories about wives leaving, about wives cheating, and there will be days that you will hear about it to deployed members cheating and such. Just hold him in your heart and lean on your family, you will get through it.

 

[Becky89*]

Quote:
I have to go to the doctors every two weeks. They have been doing a sono and since I don't want to know the sex of the baby without Josh's thoughts about it so its hard for my doctor who is in Bradford to talk about it cause he keeps trying not to use pronouns and its funny, I am very relaxed with my new doctor.

Josh has a laptop that he took with him, I've only heard from him once since he left and I know that when he gets time he'll surprise me by getting on his instant Messanger

I have a very loud dinging noise that is set to occur on both my cell phone and my computer for when Josh gets on

!!!!

My soccer team kicks not only when I lay down but when I am in the middle of a speech at work or when I am drinking my water bottle. I usually get the hiccups cause it kind of startles me

 

[Becky89*]

Josh knows everything about computers and he is the best at any electronics.

I miss him so much. I wear his dirty t- shirt and a clean pair of his boxers to bed every night. I've been sleeping on his side of the bed to!

 

[therealsilkiechick]

then the doc is monitoring the baby as a precaution. the sono's r to make sure the baby is doing good. if anything is wrong they have to tell u. don't worry and stress everything will be fine.

if josh is not contacting u don't worry it just means he is busy and hard at work.

sometimes they get so busy over there u don't hear from them for awhile. when my friend was in iraq sometimes it was 3mths before he could get on to email me or write letters home via snail mail. he should have a military email now. i know marques did after he was there and got settled in for awhile.

if so he should get emails from u faster and can check it more but they r monitored if i'm not mistaken and remember right. i think it is so they don't leak locations and forbidden info to protect the units while stationed there. i remember i wasn't allowed to ask direct info or location he could only answer general things. we could talk about everyday things though.

even if u don't hear from him write him as much as possible so when he does have free time he know's ur there and thinking of him. he can read them when he can. it so helps them when they r over there and i cannot stress that enough. they need to know back home they r loved very much and thought of all the time. send pics of ur belly getting big so he can share in with the baby comeing still. tell him how good the baby doc visits r going and about hearing it's heartbeat and kicking and things. that way he don't feel left out and missing everything. tell him how good u r doing and send pics of u too.

send ur josh care packages even once a mth if u can. bake him something, make him something, send him mabe things he could use there. a care package from home means so much to them while there too. check with the salvation army mabe i think that's who does it or red cross. they should have a list of supplies u can send to soldiers, i know some things r not allowed. that way u have a list of things u can make and send they allow him to have while there. our school does it and takes up collections and we send them to soldiers over there from our community. the school kid's write letters and make cards to go with them also.

god bless,
mar

 

[sianara]

Becky89* :

I didn't ask him about the baby thing due to timing cause he looked at me talked for two minutes and left for surgery.

I'm sure your doctor is very busy however, you have questions and concerns that need to be addressed and you must be proactive for yourself. My kids are in college and high school now but still to this day I write down any/all questions I have for the Dr. BEFORE the visit and I ask them during the visits. Their doctor once told me she loved the fact that I always came with notes and it made her feel as though the information she supplied me with was really being heeded since I was writing it down (very quickly and messily maybe) and could go back to it in my own time. I do the same thing during my own Dr. appointments.

I'm not saying you should expect your Dr. to spend an endless amount of time with you but it is not unreasonable to expect him/her to be able to give you more than 2 minutes of his/her time. If you go into the appointment prepared with your list of questions/concerns it will actually make the process of getting the information you seek much quicker and efficient. If you're unsure of something he/she is saying, do not be afraid or intimidated to ask for clarification or the correct spelling of a term you don't recognize and then you can do some online research yourself. Empower yourself, you're the only one that can do it.

I got married at 19 but didn't have my first child until 27. Even at the ripe old age of 27 I was a little intimidated by some of "those in the know" in the medical field. I went through 5 years of infertility treatments and 3 different doctors by the time I found the right one who could help me. Because of my young age, I didn't get the respect that I get now as an "old" lady. With the first Dr. I was told since I was so young there was no real rush for me to achieve pregnancy which infuriated me. It was inappropriate for him to say that and I left his practice soon after. I learned how to use that fury in a positive way and "armed" myself with the knowledge I needed to get the knowledge I seeked. I was ALWAYS respectful which I'm sure helped me in the long run.

Over the years I have recognized that I needed to be proactive to get the answers I needed because nobody else was going to do it for me and rightfully so. You're going to be a mother soon so it's time to start stretching those wings now. When you learn something new regarding the pregnancy, birth, baby or anything share it with hubby. Knowing that you are doing well and feeling in control of your life will help alleviate any stress for you that he might be feeling too.

Good luck and keep us posted. You'll do fine...

 

[horsejody]

All will be well. He will be back before you know it. I was in the Marines, my husband was in the Marines, and my son is currently in the Marines. Your guy is doing a service to his country and the world. Be proud. Take care of yourself and the baby. If the truth be known, he is probably just as worried about you and the baby as you are about him. Keep the faith. You will get through this.

 

[Becky89*]

I went for another appointment today and the baby is still in the wrong direction. They want me to start holding my belly to see if that will help.

I am sitting here at 1 am eastern time and I just finished watching a home video of Josh and I

I'll write more later, I was thinking about fixing him a care package but the savation army told me nothing that will help me.

 

[Becky89*]

I recieved a snail mail letter from Josh saying that his troop might be pulling out cause he's with the data teams he's no longer a patrolman.

Is this a dream or does the letter I hold in my hand speak the trueth. Josh has told me things before just to make me feel better I hope he's not doing it again with this.

 

[menkot]

Ok, I know this has been mentioned before but evidently it needs mentioning again. If your dr. is worried about your baby's position at 20 some odd weeks then your dr. is an idiot and you need to swap drs. Most babies are nowhere near position yet. I don't know of any dr. that would be concerned before at least 34-36 weeks. Even if your baby was in position at this point there is a really good chance it would turn several times before birth. That is just crazy! As for holding your stomach to get it to change position.... that is even crazier. I think you need to run not walk to another practice. I am on baby number 5 so I do have a little experience here.


My advice to you is to know as much as your dr. or at least be as educated as you can about the whole pregnancy and birth experience. No one should go in blindly trusting any dr. They are all human and all make mistakes.

Sorry to sound harsh but your dr is really worrying me.

 

[Becky89*]

I am going to start doing my own research and take your advice I am in a small area and there are very few baby doctors around.