So many great approaches. I will adopt the fried chicken one.
HUSBAND vs.WIFE-Can you really complain??
- Thread starter sonew123
- Start date
- Thread starter
- #12
Yard full o' rocks :
Ok.....working from my home office today so thought I would "chime in" from a Man's Perspective.
There is NO WAY I could afford to pay someone for everything my wife does. She "substitute teaches" occasionally now that our children are teenagers, but from the time the oldest was born until a few years ago, she was a "stay at home mama". Cooked, cleaned, made Dr visits, kept the house up, did the shopping, bathed the kids, etc, etc, etc, etc
I have been the chief "bread winner" if you will, but I could NEVER do what she has done for our family. During a period a few years ago with an unexpected death in the family, she was gone for almost a week. I was playing "stay at home Mom (thank goodness I was in sales) and trying to maintain my job". For you ladies that have the ability to stay home and "multi task" the multi-tasks, my hats off to all of you. By the end of that week I was ready to pull my hair out (what little there is)
I guess that's why the Good Lord made men and women differently....we each have our "jobs" and it seems to me that in most marriages, the partners carry their fair share of the load, only in different ways
Merry Christmas y'all!!
Merry Christmas to you!
I was a stay at home mom for 5 years ...The first 5 of oldests life and first 2 of youngest...Even though my Dh was pulling in 70 hrs a week-financially-it wasn't enough
So I went back to work-I dont know what I was thinking but at the same time..I went back to college taking 9-12 credits a semester for 4 years until I graudated
Thank goodness that's all over!
Ok.....working from my home office today so thought I would "chime in" from a Man's Perspective.
There is NO WAY I could afford to pay someone for everything my wife does. She "substitute teaches" occasionally now that our children are teenagers, but from the time the oldest was born until a few years ago, she was a "stay at home mama". Cooked, cleaned, made Dr visits, kept the house up, did the shopping, bathed the kids, etc, etc, etc, etc
I have been the chief "bread winner" if you will, but I could NEVER do what she has done for our family. During a period a few years ago with an unexpected death in the family, she was gone for almost a week. I was playing "stay at home Mom (thank goodness I was in sales) and trying to maintain my job". For you ladies that have the ability to stay home and "multi task" the multi-tasks, my hats off to all of you. By the end of that week I was ready to pull my hair out (what little there is)
I guess that's why the Good Lord made men and women differently....we each have our "jobs" and it seems to me that in most marriages, the partners carry their fair share of the load, only in different ways
Merry Christmas y'all!!
Merry Christmas to you!
I was a stay at home mom for 5 years ...The first 5 of oldests life and first 2 of youngest...Even though my Dh was pulling in 70 hrs a week-financially-it wasn't enough
So I went back to work-I dont know what I was thinking but at the same time..I went back to college taking 9-12 credits a semester for 4 years until I graudated
Ok I'll bite. This is kindof fun and also think this will be good for me to really stop and think about things.
Husband:
Works full time 9.5 to 10 hours a day, five days a week. Plus a 30 minute commute each way.
Does most outdoor chores including: trimming shrubs/trees, mulching fallen leaves, weeding large rocked areas
Does all car projects including washing, and oil changes, checking fluid levels, repairs, ect.
Takes care of our daughter while I work, except some babysitting done by a friend.
Often does laundry, maybe one load a week.
Cleans kitchen occassionally, maybe three times a month.
Goes to the gym 2-5 days a week, varies a lot.
Keeps the Garage clean.
Puts laundry away regularly, at least twice a week.
Does projects with our daughter, couple times a week. Especially helpful when I am cooking/cleaning.
Pays bills once a month, keeps track of ongoing bills like medical payments, ect.
Makes the bed.
Me:
Work a varied amount of hours a week from 5-36 outside of the home. This includes dog training and caregiving, bulk of caregiving I do is an night.
Take care of our daughter bulk of the time, I am the main teacher and disciplinarian.
All of the cooking.
All meal planning and food budgeting.
All of the shopping.
Bulk of the cleaning, kitchen daily, bathrooms weekly or as needed, vacuuming, dusting.
Take care of the dog and our rabbits.
Clean rabbit hutch.
Pay bills once a month.
Keep track of bill budget, update him on our new bills.
Plan his lunches according to our food menu on a bi-weekly basis.
Organizing the house.
Bulk of the laundry about three loads a week. Give or take.
I always bathe our daughter.
Groom the dog.
I do any "extra" stuff such as planning get-to-gethers with friends, outings. Any holiday decorating.
Husband:
Works full time 9.5 to 10 hours a day, five days a week. Plus a 30 minute commute each way.
Does most outdoor chores including: trimming shrubs/trees, mulching fallen leaves, weeding large rocked areas
Does all car projects including washing, and oil changes, checking fluid levels, repairs, ect.
Takes care of our daughter while I work, except some babysitting done by a friend.
Often does laundry, maybe one load a week.
Cleans kitchen occassionally, maybe three times a month.
Goes to the gym 2-5 days a week, varies a lot.
Keeps the Garage clean.
Puts laundry away regularly, at least twice a week.
Does projects with our daughter, couple times a week. Especially helpful when I am cooking/cleaning.
Pays bills once a month, keeps track of ongoing bills like medical payments, ect.
Makes the bed.
Me:
Work a varied amount of hours a week from 5-36 outside of the home. This includes dog training and caregiving, bulk of caregiving I do is an night.
Take care of our daughter bulk of the time, I am the main teacher and disciplinarian.
All of the cooking.
All meal planning and food budgeting.
All of the shopping.
Bulk of the cleaning, kitchen daily, bathrooms weekly or as needed, vacuuming, dusting.
Take care of the dog and our rabbits.
Clean rabbit hutch.
Pay bills once a month.
Keep track of bill budget, update him on our new bills.
Plan his lunches according to our food menu on a bi-weekly basis.
Organizing the house.
Bulk of the laundry about three loads a week. Give or take.
I always bathe our daughter.
Groom the dog.
I do any "extra" stuff such as planning get-to-gethers with friends, outings. Any holiday decorating.
- Thread starter
- #14
Jaime...ummmm..I'd fuss!
Your a good wifey! You win the war in your house
Your a good wifey! You win the war in your house
Quote:
Haha, I actually don't look at it that way.
Sometimes I ask for more from him, but his job is very stressful and very physically demanding. He's the Manager of a large Autoshop. He deals all of the managment duties: hire/fire/scheduling, plus keeping up with sales quota, car repair times and dealing with any customers that aren't happy. Then he also has to do a lot of teaching and hands-on repair himself when he's got new mechanics -- which is quite often. He has a lot of people he answers to above him. All the yard maintinance is hard work too because we do not have a lawn and to keep the rockery areas looking nice is a lot of upkeep.
As for me I have periods of being very inconsistent with my own "duties" and so I suppose the complaining can go either way. For the most part we work well together and in our "areas" we have agreed on.
Haha, I actually don't look at it that way.
As for me I have periods of being very inconsistent with my own "duties" and so I suppose the complaining can go either way. For the most part we work well together and in our "areas" we have agreed on.
My husband I were married for 28 years - divorced for 8 - and have been remarried for the past 5 years. We learned the hard way that holding grudges and keeping score doesn't work. When something starts to irritate me, I ask myself if it's important. Will it matter tomorrow, next week, next year? Although I actually had a lot of fun during those 8 single years and they were good for me in many ways, I also realized that I'd much rather be with my husband.
"Love is patient and kind - it does not envy or boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."
I would guess that if people totaled up what each person does in the marriage, that many would be surprised at how much their spouse does.
Don't know why I thought of this - but writing this reminded me of a woman I taught school with many years ago who would talk about the arguments she and her husband had, and she said she always told him that her job was more important than his since she was affecting children's futures. I would not be surprised if that couple isn't already divorced.
Anyway - glad to see that most everyone here has worked out the division of chores/responsibilities in their family.
"Love is patient and kind - it does not envy or boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."
I would guess that if people totaled up what each person does in the marriage, that many would be surprised at how much their spouse does.
Don't know why I thought of this - but writing this reminded me of a woman I taught school with many years ago who would talk about the arguments she and her husband had, and she said she always told him that her job was more important than his since she was affecting children's futures. I would not be surprised if that couple isn't already divorced.
Anyway - glad to see that most everyone here has worked out the division of chores/responsibilities in their family.
Quote:
Beautiful post, thank you Carol!
Beautiful post, thank you Carol!
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My husband is disabled with emphysema and can't do much. When he was healthy we had a fairly equal division of chores. Now I pretty much do everything. BUT I am not complaining. I am absolutely CERTAIN that if the tables were turned, HE would be the one taking care of me and our home.
Ladies, appreciate your men. Men, appreciate your ladies. You never know when they will be gone.
Ladies, appreciate your men. Men, appreciate your ladies. You never know when they will be gone.
- Thread starter
- #20
Quote:
Beautiful post, thank you Carol!
X2--I created this post not to say who wins -per say-but to verbally admit my DH is a good hard working man
I gripe and complain but looking at what I wrote about him-how could I?
I can and do but I should be a wee bit more in tune with reality and how good I have it!
Beautiful post, thank you Carol!
X2--I created this post not to say who wins -per say-but to verbally admit my DH is a good hard working man
I can and do but I should be a wee bit more in tune with reality and how good I have it!
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