I can't stand it. Thinking of giving up chicken keeping. It is just so horrible.

Discussion in 'Emergencies / Diseases / Injuries and Cures' started by DarkWater1929, Nov 10, 2015.

  1. DarkWater1929

    DarkWater1929 Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Jan 27, 2015
    Redding, California
    Each time I develop a special relationship with one of my chickens, it dies. I am heartbroken. Again. My Q-Tip, the first chick ever hatched here, at home, had a sudden seizure about 15 minutes ago, and died in my arms. I have not yet told my husband; he loves her so much. I can't stand to tell him! Q-Tip was hatched about 8 months ago. She was the most beautiful, lavender colored, Polish hen I have ever seen. She was a pet, and came in and out of the house at will. She was at worst tolerated by dogs, cat, turkeys, cows, sheep and goats alike. Most humans simply adored her. She would alight, without warning, on shoulders, heads, laps.... And now she is gone. No, I cannot afford to have a necropsy done. I do not have the heart to perform one myself.

    My Looloo, as I have said here before, was killed by a hawk recently.

    Mama chicken succumbed to Marek's after a valiant fight that went on for months. Her mate, Rasta, followed her in the same way about a month later. They, also, were precious pets more than livestock.

    We have 30+ healthy, robust, hungry, demanding chickens. Not one of them has dropped dead, or been killed, unless it was a favorite. I really can't stand it. I grieve them so intensely. I still cannot stand to go to the part of the garden where my husband buried Looloo. Although in each case, I did all I could, or was unable to do anything at all, I am overcome with guilt. I feel that I, as their caretaker and keeper, should have kept them safe. I did not, and it is just awful to bear that.

    I only tell you folks these things because no one else I know would understand, even a little bit. To grieve a chicken would baffle most people, and I could not stand to be teased about this. Not yet.

    I notice, in reading posts about similar tragedies, that when a chicken dies unexpectedly, it is OFTEN the very favorite. I wonder why that is? I begin to feel that the surest way for me to end a chicken's life, is to get too fond of it. I love Q-Tip. The idea of putting her into the cold ground has me weak with misery.

    Thanks for listening.
     
  2. Bridebeliever

    Bridebeliever Chillin' With My Peeps

    You poor thing! I'm so sorry! [​IMG] This thing is rather my worst nightmare. I'm very attached to two of my 10 chickens and I don't know how I will handle it when this happens. But the sad fact of life is this WILL happen. Be it 5 minutes or 5 months or 5 years from now. I don't know what time frame would be easier! If you are a person who gets attached to your animals you have to get used to this sad fact. You must console yourself that you gave them the best love/food/life they ever could have anywhere. You treated them fabulously! They were cared for! They probably are predisposed to a certain life span...but they got to live with YOU! You've done great, keep on loving them!
     
  3. Jesusfreak101

    Jesusfreak101 Chillin' With My Peeps

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    I am so sorry, hugs keep on loving them its better to have known them then having not.
     
  4. beetandsteet

    beetandsteet Chillin' With My Peeps

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    I am so sorry! [​IMG] I understand. Chicken keeping--the same as keeping any other animal, heck even loving human beings--is subject to loss, and when it comes, it is super painful. Chickens are so easy to get attached to. Don't fault yourself though. Q-tip especially sounds like a wonderful bird. BTW is Q-tip in your profile pic? That chicken is gorgeous.
     
  5. minichicks05

    minichicks05 Chillin' With My Peeps

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    The think I tell my self before I get chicks is I cant get attached to them they will pass away at some point so I try to give them treats and make them happy so when they do die They will have wonderful lives and I am sure you did that too but you know at least she had a wonderful happy life and God took her away for a reason and I am sure that it was a good reason.
    p.s. I hope you have much luck in the future with your poultry [​IMG]
     
  6. medic lynny

    medic lynny Out Of The Brooder

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    Im sooooo sorry.I would be sick.
     
  7. DarkWater1929

    DarkWater1929 Chillin' With My Peeps

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  8. DarkWater1929

    DarkWater1929 Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Hunh. Somehow, my text didn't make it into that post! So, here is what I meant to say. If I am wrong, and this is a duplicate, forgive me, please!

    Thank you ALL so much! I really do appreciate your kind words and thoughts.

    Yes, Q-Tip had a very happy, indulged life. She was one of those who stuck around after the treats were gone, just because she liked to socialize with us. When she got Bird Pox about 4 weeks ago, I was sick with fear. I installed her in the bathroom, so she would be warm and safe, but my husband had her in the bedroom nearly all the time. I have never washed bedding so often, despite having shower curtains spread over the bed. But Q-Tip came through the pox smoothly. She only had one bump beside her beak when she died, yesterday.

    She had been sitting in her favorite spot, under the woodstove. I glanced over, and she was on her side, with her head arched back, horribly. I once had a dog that got into a neighbor's snail bait. The gruesome posture was the same. I scooped her up, and ran to my husband, who is the de facto vet for the 100+ cattle we babysit. He always seems to know, somehow, what to do. In this case he did not, though. I took her into the bedroom, to get on line and beg you folks for emergency advice, but before I had even reached this site, she was gone. I thought I would explode from the horror of it.

    I have scoured the house. There is nothing I can find that could have poisoned her. I have researched and read all about heart attacks, impacted crops, eggs getting stuck or bursting internally, and all sorts of other possible causes of death, including "sudden chicken death syndrome." Some sound similar, due to the seizure, but Q-Tip did not vomit or poop green stuff, as did every other case I read about. I have no clue what significance that has, if any.

    I have another sick bird, who is also a favorite of mine, though for different reasons. This one is likely to die, and I have known it for quite some time. I will post about her later, because I am baffled by a new turn she has taken. I am braced for her possible death, because she has struggled valiantly for a long time, but is losing weight, and she can't go on like that very long. Poor baby. But I was totally blindsided by Q-Tip's death. Totally blindsided.

    No, Q-Tip is not the bird in my profile photo. That crazy-looking specimen is our Polish rooster, "Bird." He has always been ... well, I cannot really call him "friendly." He sometimes goes utterly mad and attacks someone for no reason that we can grasp! But, he has some interest in us, I guess I could say. He comes and observes us from time to time. He will even consent to be held and petted, if he is in a mellow mood. And he is a lovely thing. I have taken more photos of him than of any other chicken I have had! So photogenic! But he has got to go. He is becoming a menace. Our other roosters can co-exist, in a tense sort of way. Not so, Bird! He is a pervert, a trouble-maker, and a total wimp when he gets the whipping he absolutely begs for from his brethren. He is going to end up hurt, or hurting someone else, and I cannot have that. So, he is on the block. (Auction, not chopping!) Even the hens won't suffer his attentions. He really has to chase them down to get his social needs met. Those are some speedy birds when properly motivated! But he is not edible, so I have his price high enough to prevent that, which is also delaying his sale. He is confined, and he hates that.

    I will post a couple of photos of my Q-Tip here. I miss her so much, already. Thanks for listening to my rambling. It helps. Yes, God has a purpose for everything He does. I just wish, sometimes, He would be a bit more gentle.... But I am blessed, and I know it, and I am grateful! Thank you so much again for your kindness.

    Patience
     
  9. wildwestcoast

    wildwestcoast Out Of The Brooder

    oh I am sorry to hear about your loss. It sounds like you gave your chicken a wonderful life though, I hope that brings you some comfort (big hug)
     
  10. minichicks05

    minichicks05 Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Your welcome wishing you prayers [​IMG]
     

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