I processed a turkey in september, but it was more of a mercy killing because the tom had twisted leg and wasnt able to get around and was hurting. I had my brother dispatch the turkey witha shot from a .22. And that was that. All I had to do was scald, pluck, gut, crop carve and finish him. I didnt have to kill the bird. Well...I have these 4 (originally started out as many more.) little white broilers lurking in a pen with the bantams and misfits. They really are quite cute, and content in there. The broilers are 4 months old. Understand that these are the ones that are advertised as "five week broilers" because thats when they get butchered usually. I got them as a meat pen for the 4-H auction, but when I messe dup a deadline on the paperwork, the market chickens couldnt go, and got to stay home, while all their other broiler contemporaries werea t the fair and then went to the processor in september. So the chickens are over 4 months old now,and yesterday I decided I should attempt to process some. But I hadnt really come to terms with whackin the head off. I got one and tied its legs, and hung it upside down..hoping he'd go sleep so could chop his head while he was out. But he didnt go to sleep and was very alert. SO I tied a rope around his neck while he was upside sown, assuming a few hard tugs should break his neck. Wrong again. SO THEN, i put the mismatched kids sock over his head so I wouldnt ahve to have him watch me kill him. then I pulled the rope taunt so his neck was straight out,and wacked him really hard in the neck like a pinata. I thought he was dead, or in a coma, and then i saw him take a breathe, and i knew i was causing him to suffer, so i took the game butchering ax, and swung hard against the tree trunk. He squawked ont he first chop. I hit his two or three times WITHIN seconds. And sat there while the flopping when everywhere, hating myself. Blood went everywhere. And then his head was in one place and his body dangling over the draining bucket. From there, processing was simple. He's all dressed out in a plastic bag in the freezer now. I noticed he had ALOT of internal fat..and around his heart there was fat. Is that a sign he was well past being ready to be butchered? Anyhow, i feel guilty now...His three siblings are fat and sassy out clucking around..and he's dead. I feel kind of guilty. Any advice for getting over that first processing blues? Or a better kill method. A .22 shot would work so much better but is expensive and tough to get 'em to hold still? Could I kill one if i shot it point blank with an airsoft gun?