I need to vent

Frost Homestead

8 Years
Jul 9, 2011
Lago Vista, TX
Hi BYC friends. I'm so upset. Hopefully this is ok to talk about here, if not I apologize.

One of my 6 brother-in-laws "Rob" is a lowlife druggie. He is in jail right now and has been since before Hanukkah. It all started when he moved back to Tx from Colorado after not being able to pay his rent. (he had no job and his wife is an "exotic dancer")

He moved all of his things into my mother-in-laws garage. Her one rule was that they not have over any guests. Rob's two younger brothers also live in the house. Rob's wife invited another man over while Rob was gone. When my MIL discovered he was in there she demanded they leave, when they refused to do so she said she was going to call the police. They locked the garage door that leads to the house and cut the circuit breaker knowing that she only has an internet phone and would not be able to call without electricity.

Rob ends up coming home and defending his wife. So MIL calls the police. Of course Rob says he has been allowed to live there so they say she has to legally evict them. Over the course of the evening/night the cops were called a total of 5 times. Rob, his wife, and the other man show up at our house at 2am. My husband tells them they are not welcome (his wife is a thief and I would never let her in my home) so they scream and curse him and leave. I guess by this time they decide to go back to MIL house. Once they realized the house had been secure they try to break the garage door, when Rob's little (19 yr old) brother hears someone trying to break in, he grabs the shotgun and yells for the person to leave. Rob breaks the door and comes in the house. When he sees his bro with the shotgun he threatens to come back later and shoot his mother and brothers and then burn the house with everyone inside.

The next day when we hear about it all we convince her to call the police again and the two younger brothers make statements. He's arrested later that night. He's been in jail since and it has been nice and quiet, very similar to how it was when they were living in Colorado.


Well. I'm here at work, and I get a call from my husband to say that he called his mother to talk and ask about the situation. Although she says Rob is still in jail, she informs him that Rob is going to buy a house that's ON OUR STREET. Of course, my husband asks how that's possible since he's in jail and has no job. He also has terrible credit and could never purchase a home on his own. As if she's out of her mind, she tells him that it's a free country and Rob can buy a house wherever he wants, and she denies that she's going to buy it for him.

We are on good terms with MIL, always have been. There is no logical reason I can see that out of the whole bloody world he has to move onto OUR street. His trashy lifestyle is so repulsive to us that we don't even want him around AT ALL, much less living near us and bringing his criminal friends to the area. I am infuriated. I called her and ask her myself how he was going to buy a house when he has no job. She repeated the same mantra that it's a free country and he can buy a house wherever he likes, then she hung up on me!


I spoke to one of the younger brothers that lives with her and he said "Ben", one of his older brothers who had been in Europe for the past year had come home and was trying to convince her not to pay Rob's 10K bond and get him out of jail. Especially since she was the one who put him in there in the first place and he needs to learn there are consequences to his actions. She then freaks out and begins throwing Ben's stuff outside (which is over the guardrail & down a cliff because of the way her house is).

After speaking with the youngest brother I couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't hold my tongue and be polite. (I'm usually well mannered lol) I wrote her a furious letter online. I figured if I called she would just hang up again which has never happened before. I told her in no uncertain terms that if she helps him in any way to obtain property near ours that I would never speak to her again. I told her that it's beyond comprehension to think that we would want their kind of scum around us and that she is assisting someone who openly disrespected her and her home, to the detriment of US (we're always good to her & the family, the only ones who visit for Passover, etc.).

I told her that she behaves like an abuse victim, she denounces him, but later she goes right back to the same routine. No matter how Rob treats her she ends up caving and giving him what he wants, usually because he threatens her with violence (which he can't really do while in a cage!). I also kinda vented as you can imagine and added a big "HOW DARE YOU!" at the end.

We have a pretty informal relationship, we're all adults. It's nothing she hasn't heard before from one of family member or another but this will be the first time she hears it from me. I HAVE HAD ENOUGH. If she encourages him to move near us I'll never forgive her.
wow I feel for you... "IF" the sale of the house does go through I would contact the local police and explain what has happened... this man has threatened his mother and younger brother and you live in fear of him...

If you have kids make sure the police know that too... make sure all your ducks are in a row to protect you and your family
thank goodness I don't have any kids (yet
anyway). after the came over at 2am we secured the house even more, we live in a small town so usually the house is pretty open. got extra locks for the fence gates, put a light out in the backyard. we are gun owners, I hate to even bring that up, but with the kinds of people they like to hang around you never know...
Wow, I am so sorry you are going through this! I can't really relate to the severity of the problem, but I can relate to having block headed family members. By blockheaded, I mean people that continously put up with rediculous behavor over and over again. All you can really do is look out for yourself and your immediate family. It looks like you have done all you can do, and I commend you for sticking up for yourself(and family). I think your mil is stuck in a situation of denial. Although her son is abusive, it is still her son. Many parents in this situation are blinded by that. I'm not sure what to tell you, but be safe and hopefully your mil will come to her senses and not help her son out. Maybe a restraining order, against your bil? That might keep him out of your neighborhood. Good luck!
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I'm glad you don't have any kids just yet (less to worry about). I'd make sure everything you own and care about are very secure, animals included. I'd not only worry about my property, but my pets being harmed, too. Btw, don't own guns myself, but I sure the heck would if I were in your situation. More power to you!
Very good observation.
Funny how some of us(like me) are so eager to give advice. I think we are just eager to help and let the op know that he/she are not alone. But very true, sometimes people do just need to vent. Sorry op
Very good observation.
Funny how some of us(like me) are so eager to give advice. I think we are just eager to help and let the op know that he/she are not alone. But very true, sometimes people do just need to vent. Sorry op

oh don't worry about it! I'm just happy to have people to talk to about this
That sucks. What about a restraining/no contact order? He might not be able to habitate a home on your street if you did that.
Contact the seller/agent and neighbors about their potential new neighbor. If its an owner finacing deal
the seller would love to avoid getting mixed up in that mess and I'm sure your neighbors might think of
how to keep them from moving in. Maybe you live near a school and there is law prohibiting felons from
living withing a certain distance. MIL is the source of your trouble, but I would find equivelent cheaper housing or better
deals and try to push her in that direction. I can't imagine a more aggravating situation. I rent apartments and
what I find, is people like your brother and sister and law don't stay long anywhere before they are evicted or get
foreclosed on. This kind of person drags everyone down with them. Just keep your head above water and eventually
he will move on to cause havoc somewhere else.

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