I'm hosting christmas dinner. It will be done at noon. rant.

i love the suggestions!

I'm emailing them. I'm saying gifts are being opened at 10 followed by Brunch iat 11 ( we will wait to open gifts till they arrive if they can make it at 10.) i dont feel bad making her come all the way here RIGHT after work more or less because she doesnt go to bed till 1 and then wants us to wait till 6? nope. sorry that wont work for us- we are still a semi working farm here!

I am totally doing brunch w/ a ham. followed by coldcuts later.....and maybe a big pot of soup
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You could always do breakfast for dinner! I LOVE having breakfast for dinner, even if it were for christmas!

Either way, I would just tell your inlaws that you are doing things the way you wish and if they want to come, great. If not, perhaps even better.

Next year if you just want to keep things simple, tell your family that you would really like to have a night to yourselves, especially since money is so tight. Either that or you could suggest having a potluck sort of dinner, where everyone brings something.

Good luck! Sounds like a complicated fiasco, but it seems tha tyour inlaws are just making petty excuses.
 
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DITTO, and fax it, and leave a voicemail with some good phleghmy coughing.

Say it may be hepatitus, just so they don't decide to come 'help'.

Best of luck with THAT. We're in a similar pinch... turns out everyone on my side is coming to my house Christmas Eve... this was a wee bit of a stretch from the 'swing by and grab your gifts on the way out/back from Arkansas" that I'd originally mentioned.

My MIL called to inform me that SIL has declared that Turkey is for Thanksgiving not Christmas, and Ham is for New Years not Christmas so MIL is required to come up with fancy (like $8/lb) cold cuts and soups for the whole clan instead. We're to send soup and SIL is making soup... whatta ya know, she's making the two soups (Beef/Veg & Broc/Cheese) that I've already got made and ready and refuses to make any other. *sigh* This is precisely why we didn't bother doing DH's side for Turkey Day... too flipping stressful. My family is insane, don't get me wrong, but you could give us a spam sandwich and a bag of cheetos and we'd be happy.

So, again, best of luck with your mess... just remember you aren't the only one praying you don't strangle anyone before New Years.


Sounds like SIL volunteered to host since she has decided the menu. Call her and say that you heard that she was planning the dinner, and 1) you'd like to know what time she is expecting everyone or 2) that you are so sorry, but you already made other plans, but maybe next year. Be sure to give a big cheery "Merry Christmas!" greeting to start and end the conversation.
 
You're the host; the menu choice is yours. So is the time, and so are the left-overs. Don't ask permission to set a time or the meal--say "we're hosting a brunch at 10; we'd love to have you join us, and will miss you if you cannot make it."

Plan ahead on leftovers and get a couple of smaller containers so that you can give them a small portion of things (or even divided plates, and fix them a couple of plates to take home). Be proactive rather than reactive--don't wait for her to fix her leftovers and rob you blind--before that even becomes a possibility, portion and label some for her and hide the rest in the deep freeze behind the frozen brussel sprouts
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As for the $$ issues, most parents don't try to rely on thier young adult children, but more often provide some support for them; no idea how to fix that other than counseling for yourselves on how to not enable. But it sounds like you're already doing an admirable job at avoiding enabling.
 
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Totally off topic but cold cuts on Christmas??? EWWWWW! You can inform her that NO pork and sauerkraut are for New Years, HAM is for Christmas!

Back on topic.....I would not buy them anything on their list. I would buy something else entirely that you can afford and if they don't like it, attach a gift receipt they can take it back. I would ask "since when do I have to pay him for helping us? Not my fault he's on Probation...his bill, not mine!" and yes....we're having brunch this year! and if they try to pack up any food to take with them, tell them "that's for my work lunches all week"
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I'm mean!
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Hunter, you are much more of a gracious host than I am. I would have told them to take a flying leap at a rolling donut. Merry Christmas and Hugs to you and the fam
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Totally off topic but cold cuts on Christmas??? EWWWWW! You can inform her that NO pork and sauerkraut are for New Years, HAM is for Christmas!

Back on topic.....I would not buy them anything on their list. I would buy something else entirely that you can afford and if they don't like it, attach a gift receipt they can take it back. I would ask "since when do I have to pay him for helping us? Not my fault he's on Probation...his bill, not mine!" and yes....we're having brunch this year! and if they try to pack up any food to take with them, tell them "that's for my work lunches all week"
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I'm mean!
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Ummmm.... you know ham is a pork product right?!
 

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